Heart-Centered Guidance | Community Engagement | Newsletter

This Is Why You Should Stop Caring What Others Think

And how it could be ruining your life

“The eyes of others our prisons; their thoughts our cages.” ― Virginia Woolf

Hello, beloved readers and writers!

How are you? Is your week off to a splendiferous start? I hope so. Drop into the comments and tell us what’s cookin’ in your world! Do you need a cyber hug or two? Do you have something to celebrate? Are you making progress on your Really Big Dream coming true?

Please share! Let us lift, encourage, or cheer for you!

Before diving into this week’s topic and other goodies, I want to apologise for having been mostly MIA recently. I’ve not been reading and commenting on your work because of a health issue. On Sunday, I thought it was under control but last night it decided to become more painful.

My body is expressing some of the emotional shifts and Big Decisions that have been playing on my mind lately. All is as it should be; I just need time to heal.

Please forgive my absence on your beautiful profiles. I miss reading your work — and I miss writing, too — but am too distracted to fully enjoy doing either of these beloved pastimes.

A Short But Important Message

I’m sure it’s a safe bet that you enjoy having your own thoughts and opinions. And I’m sure it’s a safe bet that you don’t appreciate others telling you what you should think about things.

I’d also hazard a guess that you don’t like it when someone tells you what they believe you think — especially when they’re wrong. And worse when they continue to insist they’re right.

Well, here’s a cool thought! It’s the same for everyone else on the planet!

All those other people will enjoy having their own thoughts and opinions. None of them will appreciate you telling them what they should think about things. Nor will they be too happy when you tell them what you believe they think, and when you insist you’re right about it.

And they will especially not like it when you’re wrong.

Whatever the topic, they don’t have to agree with you and it doesn’t matter who’s right. Besides, there might not even be a “right” or “wrong.” You can cram your opinions down their throats all you want. It won’t change the fact that they’re entitled to have all their own thoughts — just as you are.

If you expect others to feel the same way when it comes to you and your thoughts, then you must give them the same respect in return. Stop bothering yourself with what anyone else thinks. If it’s people who really care about you, they’ll support you even if they disagree with your choices.

And if it’s not someone who particularly gives a rat’s @$$ about you, why on earth would you care what they think? You’ll be tearing your hair out for nothing.

So cut yourself a major break and let it go. They’re probably too busy with their own lives to give much thought to what you do anyway.

The bottom line is simple: What anyone else thinks is none of your business, just as what you think is none of theirs.

The invitation: I would love to see your submissions on this topic. All too often, many people turn themselves inside out worrying about what other people think. It can make them take jobs or choose careers they don’t want — or even hate. It can impact their choices of partners, their hobbies, their spiritual paths.

It can even make people hide their true selves, their sexual orientation, gender identity, interests, even their opinions — anything that is deemed “wrong,” unpopular, or controversial. Or that simply might go against the approval of their families and friends.

Maybe it’s due to a fear of being rejected, embarrassed, cast out, not loved.

Or a long list of other possibilities.

Have you ever wrestled with “What will they think of me??”

I’m pretty sure you have. How did it impact your life? Has it ever adversely affected you or your decisions?

Let’s open up a conversation about this and see where we go.

I hope — I trust — that we will discover we’re a lot more the same than we are different.

Did you miss last week’s “newsletterish”?

Celebrate our growth in followers!

• Shorties But Goodies — 230
• Hope, Healing and Humour — 145
• The Witchy One — 54

Thank you for your ongoing support of our Pub Family! Every week, new followers, new writers, our family is growing!

As always, we had some fantastic submissions in the past week covering a wide range of topics. I am such a lucky pub owner with great writers who share their stories, hearts, and souls so beautifully. 🎁 🙏🏻 💝

Take a look!

BichoDoMato can’t even write a recipe without cracking me up (right along with the eggs):

And he’s discovered some more Medium weirdness…has anyone else noticed this yet?

Neha Sonney, Author offers a very cool poem, complete with a fantastic message AND a built-in puzzle!

Christina shares a short and very sweet story of a deeper truth about grace and gardens…

And Tyra Jaide has hopped on the self-care bandwagon with a simple but powerful piece to inspire you!

Carrie Kolar wrote a “punch you in the face” compelling piece about her years-long battle with frequent suicidal thoughts and feelings. It left me in floods of tears as she shared powerful details about how she fought her way through it to a much happier place, and how you/others can do it, too:

Carrie’s also got a splendiferous idea about a fun way to help those who could use some assistance:

Gary L Ellis has written a lovely poem and offered an inspiring message for those dark and despairing moments. If that’s you right now, or someone you know, it’s well worth a look:

Niall Leah shares thoughts on a topic that I’m sure all of us will understand. No doubt we’ve been on both sides of this. Awareness is half the battle:

Suma Narayan has written a fun poem that’s sure to make you smile! Such a sweet scene; I could see the entire story in vivid detail:

Mary V shares some FAB insights to keep you moving — on all levels! I love this short, perky piece:

And wait till you see another of Mary’s short but punchy messages!! Need a little boost of encouragement? An insightful reminder? Here it is!

Sahil Patel wants to offer some encouragement for those times when our writing mojo has gone on holiday:

And he’s also written a piece on how to do battle with perfectionism if it’s having an adverse impact on your writing:

Sahil has also contributed a short poem about how to move forward, even when life is hard:

And he shares an interesting poem on rejection:

This short, lovely poem by Asim Nori serves as a powerful reminder of something that is so important to our writing, and to every other aspect of our lives. If you can come from this place in everything you do, you will transform your life in ways you cannot imagine.

Witchy interviewed our Pub Family member, Jimmy Misner Jr., and he offered some thoughtful, inspiring answers:

She’s also shared another, uh… “highly questionable” Tarot reading — with some useful messages in spite of herself (hmm, go figure!):

Annnnnd as always, Witchy wants to share a little story, too. She doesn’t like it (nor does she understand it) when people call her drawings “jokes.” To her, in each drawing she shares a story about trying to understand life and how things work in a strange, new country.

This was the result of her watching an old Western film:

I hope you have a wonderful week filled with everything you wish for yourself!

And…a heartfelt “Thank you!” to our beautiful Pub Family:

Dr Andrea Polzer Kris Bedenian Rodney Brazier Patti Murray Voncannon Carrie Kolar Croix Sather Deb Fiore Dina Alexander DL Nemeril Donnette Anglin Loren Lieberthal Jimmy Misner Jr. Judy Millar Julie Gaeta Pene Hodge Karen Schwartz James Knight Laura Izquierdo Dr. Preeti Singh Radhika Iyer Sam Branstner Sharon Sayler, Author Umme Salma Susie Kearley Tamil T Mann Vidya Sury, Collecting Smiles Lion~ Wendy S. Bradfield Yana Bostongirl Jo An Fox-Wright Maddox Suma Narayan Penny Walsh Shameem Anwar Irene Fassler Sandy Peckinpah Trista Signe Ainsworth Slow train A.H. Mehr Alex Frederickson Ashley Nicole B.R. Shenoy Carolyn Hastings Christina Christine Vann, MSc. Ellie Jacobson ✍🏻 The Soulful Scribbler Isabel Young Kaz Rochford Nia Simone McLeod Nicole Hilbig Patricia Wright Pam Winter Rachella Angel Page Jodian Marie Thomas, MS, Bsc, Asc L Burton Muhammad Abdullah Kate Aries Danielle Hestand Sahil Patel Jessica Rabel Sharing Words Malky McEwan Belinda Castle Barbara Cook Tyra Jaide Megan Llorente Eko BP Drashti Shroff Evergreen Eden Bernie Pullen Hamsalekha Rhea Anglesey CARMEN F MICSA Robin Oakman Mary Vraa Libby Shively McAvoy Kristina God Niall Leah Debbra Lupien, Voice of the Akashic Records Toya Qualls-Barnette June Kirri Dawn :) Divya Goswami BichoDoMato Evon Carole Olsen Cosmin Firta Jennifer Dunne Kylie van Gelder Neha Sonney, Author Christina Sponias Ian Hanson Ira Robinson JF Danskin Patrick OConnell Mary V Elvie Lins❤️ Carmellita Roopleen Esther Friolo- Guirao Gauri Sirur Kristie Leong M.D. IJaveria Ansari Asim Nori Dipo Adebayo Andreia Damian Berthran Benaiah Jenine Bsharah Baines Jodi Marie Ximena Paz Paredes Mahein Kazi Gary L Ellis Mario López-Goicoechea Raine Lore