Thanksgiving Sex and Relationship Shenanigans Lead to Lockup

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find her sex toy of choice, the women had a heated argument that ended with hands and ironing boards flying. Instead of having the hot, holiday sex she craved, Donaldson ended up being charged with misdemeanor assault and battery.</p><figure id="e1e4"><img src="https://cdn-images-1.readmedium.com/v2/resize:fit:800/1*kkPOdd3UqcLBmnK8voHDUQ.jpeg"><figcaption>Photo by <a href="https://depositphotos.com/portfolio-1010613.html?content=photo">AndreyPopov</a> on <a href="https://depositphotos.com/137857474/stock-photo-wife-hitting-husband.html">DepositPhotos</a></figcaption></figure><h2 id="bd90">The Fellatio Fumble</h2><p id="590f">A couple was enjoying a nice session of Thanksgiving <a href="https://readmedium.com/20-thoughts-i-had-while-giving-my-first-blow-job-595821b02aa3">fellatio</a> when the woman’s phone rang. And that’s where the trouble started: Instead of continuing to do the deed with her boyfriend, she decided to answer her <a href="https://readmedium.com/that-time-the-obscene-phone-caller-hung-up-on-me-bad-phone-sex-f17b74858958">phone</a>. Then, when asked who was on the line, according to police, she “lied to him and told him it was a girlfriend, but it was really another guy.” The <a href="https://readmedium.com/common-lies-we-tell-our-partner-to-avoid-sex-27b094cec3b6">lie</a> didn’t fly because the boyfriend heard the other man’s voice, so he put an end to his holiday blow job, “stood up from the couch,” and slapped the woman across the face. When the police arrived, the man did admit that his girlfriend’s “story was correct regarding the <a href="https://readmedium.com/3-times-oral-sex-led-to-a-hospital-visit-fellatio-cunnilingus-f15f5ad176bb">oral sex</a>,” but he denied hitting her. <a href="https://www.thesmokinggun.com/buster/south-carolina/when-trysting-couch-best-let-call-go-voicemail">No charges were filed</a> because the woman refused to cooperate and there was no physical evidence of assault. No word on if there was evidence of <a href="https://readmedium.com/20-more-quotes-for-national-orgasm-day-20f982e6bebe">orgasm</a> either.</p><p id="0e8b" type="7">The dispute started when her girlfriend “began looking for her detachable latex penis.”</p><h2 id="5fcd">Leftover Lividness</h2><p id="5c4f">What happens when you go to the kitchen a couple of days after Thanksgiving and find that your leftovers are all gone? If you’re <a href="http://www.thesmokinggun.com/documents/stabbing-over-thanksgiving-leftovers-578341">Taz Miller</a>, you pull out a kitchen knife and deal with the scofflaw who had the audacity to deprive you of another tryptophan-laced meal. In this Thanksgiving dinner disaster, Miller threatened, and then stabbed and tried to strangle his mother’s boyfriend, Christopher Teer, after learning he had eaten the leftover turkey. Now the only leftovers he’ll have from that Thanksgiving are a criminal record that includes charges of battery with a <a href="https://readmedium.com/quotes-about-death-4021b06100f5">deadly</a> weapon and

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strangulation.</p><p id="4759"><b><i>More from Kiki Wellington:</i></b></p><div id="771c" class="link-block"> <a href="https://readmedium.com/sex-and-the-florida-woman-bef8b8604a91"> <div> <div> <h2>Sex and the Florida Woman</h2> <div><h3>She’s not as well-known as the Florida Man, but her antics are no less outlandish</h3></div> <div><p>medium.com</p></div> </div> <div> <div style="background-image: url(https://miro.readmedium.com/v2/resize:fit:320/1*QohuQBDAjAZ_5v0toLybcg.jpeg)"></div> </div> </div> </a> </div><div id="2cb4" class="link-block"> <a href="https://readmedium.com/sex-and-the-florida-man-arrested-dde0a8d735fa"> <div> <div> <h2>Sex and the Florida Man</h2> <div><h3>7 times Florida Man got horny…then arrested</h3></div> <div><p>medium.com</p></div> </div> <div> <div style="background-image: url(https://miro.readmedium.com/v2/resize:fit:320/1*0CY2_FNsjNtvqFvbKu1Orw.jpeg)"></div> </div> </div> </a> </div><div id="89fd" class="link-block"> <a href="https://readmedium.com/mannequin-thefts-f774deef49ed"> <div> <div> <h2>Just Another Manic Mannequin Mugging</h2> <div><h3>3 cases of criminal mannequin manhandling</h3></div> <div><p>medium.com</p></div> </div> <div> <div style="background-image: url(https://miro.readmedium.com/v2/resize:fit:320/0*-7VgMTN0dttkL7sS)"></div> </div> </div> </a> </div><p id="92cd"><b>Sources:</b></p><p id="dffd"><i>Cops: Missing Sex Toy Triggered Domestic Assault</i>. The Smoking Gun. <a href="http://www.thesmokinggun.com/documents/assaulted-over-missing-sex-toy-785631">http://www.thesmokinggun.com/documents/assaulted-over-missing-sex-toy-785631</a></p><p id="6de9"><i>Cops: Woman, 47, Stabbed Boyfriend For Starting Thanksgiving Dinner Without Her</i>. The Smoking Gun. <a href="http://www.thesmokinggun.com/buster/assault/thanksgiving-stabbing-897631">http://www.thesmokinggun.com/buster/assault/thanksgiving-stabbing-897631</a></p><p id="01c6"><i>Man Stabbed Victim Who Ate Turkey Leftovers</i>. The Smoking Gun. <a href="http://www.thesmokinggun.com/documents/stabbing-over-thanksgiving-leftovers-578341">http://www.thesmokinggun.com/documents/stabbing-over-thanksgiving-leftovers-578341</a></p><p id="542e"><i>When Trysting On The Couch, Best To Let That Call Go To Voicemail</i>. The Smoking Gun. <a href="https://www.thesmokinggun.com/buster/south-carolina/when-trysting-couch-best-let-call-go-voicemail">https://www.thesmokinggun.com/buster/south-carolina/when-trysting-couch-best-let-call-go-voicemail</a></p></article></body>

When holiday passions run too high, legalities ensue

Now that Thanksgiving is over and we’re using leftovers to make turkey sandwiches, we’re hearing stories about how people spent the holiday. Some stuffed their faces all day. Some enjoyed holiday sex with their partner. Some had failed attempts at turkey deep frying. But for some people, the holiday was plagued by relationship drama and sexcapades that led to a holiday visit to a holding cell. These are their stories.

When the police arrived, the man did admit that his girlfriend’s “story was correct regarding the oral sex”….

Turkey Time Treat Turns Turbulent

Although it’s more polite to wait for your significant other to join you at the Thanksgiving table before you dig in, sometimes you just can’t wait. But there will most likely be consequences, especially if your other half has anger issues like Jack-Lyn Blake. When she discovered that her boyfriend, Benjamin Smith, began feasting on their Thanksgiving meal while she was passed out drunk, she flew into a rage, chased him around the dinner table with a knife, and stabbed him. Smith called the police and when they arrived, Blake boldly let them know the truth: “I stabbed him.” She was charged with reckless endangerment, making terroristic threats, and aggravated assault with a deadly weapon.

Sex Toy Squabble

The desire for a hot Thanksgiving tryst led to an assault with an ironing board when Arteesha Donaldson and Latoya Hudson got into a knock-down, drag-out fight over a missing sex toy. Hudson told police that the dispute started when her girlfriend “began looking for her detachable latex penis.” When she couldn’t find her sex toy of choice, the women had a heated argument that ended with hands and ironing boards flying. Instead of having the hot, holiday sex she craved, Donaldson ended up being charged with misdemeanor assault and battery.

The Fellatio Fumble

A couple was enjoying a nice session of Thanksgiving fellatio when the woman’s phone rang. And that’s where the trouble started: Instead of continuing to do the deed with her boyfriend, she decided to answer her phone. Then, when asked who was on the line, according to police, she “lied to him and told him it was a girlfriend, but it was really another guy.” The lie didn’t fly because the boyfriend heard the other man’s voice, so he put an end to his holiday blow job, “stood up from the couch,” and slapped the woman across the face. When the police arrived, the man did admit that his girlfriend’s “story was correct regarding the oral sex,” but he denied hitting her. No charges were filed because the woman refused to cooperate and there was no physical evidence of assault. No word on if there was evidence of orgasm either.

The dispute started when her girlfriend “began looking for her detachable latex penis.”

Leftover Lividness

What happens when you go to the kitchen a couple of days after Thanksgiving and find that your leftovers are all gone? If you’re Taz Miller, you pull out a kitchen knife and deal with the scofflaw who had the audacity to deprive you of another tryptophan-laced meal. In this Thanksgiving dinner disaster, Miller threatened, and then stabbed and tried to strangle his mother’s boyfriend, Christopher Teer, after learning he had eaten the leftover turkey. Now the only leftovers he’ll have from that Thanksgiving are a criminal record that includes charges of battery with a deadly weapon and strangulation.

More from Kiki Wellington:

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