Quickie: The Real Reason Your Partner Falls Asleep Right After Sex

Being tired may only be part of the equation

You and your partner just had sex and no sooner than you orgasm, they roll over and before you know it, they’re snoring. No lovey-dovey pillow talk. No cuddling.

No nothing.

You may just chalk it up to your partner being exhausted after the great sex you gave them. And maybe you’re right. But that may not be the real reason for their behavior, according to a study in the Journal of Social, Evolutionary, and Cultural Psychology.

During their research, Daniel Kruger and Susan Hughes surveyed 456 people about who in their relationship was more likely to fall asleep first after sex, as well as who was more likely to fall asleep first when the couple didn’t have sex. The study authors found that when someone’s partner fell asleep before they did, they were more likely to want post-coital cuddling and pillow talk. On the other hand, the person who fell asleep first may have a very specific psychological reason for doing it.

“Falling asleep before one’s partner may be a non-conscious way to foreclose on any commitment conversation after sex,” Hughes explained.

“Reproductive strategies don’t end with intercourse; they may influence specific behaviors directly following sex.”

Before you assume that it was just men who did this — that is the stereotype after all — researchers found that women and men both tended to use this avoidance strategy. However, according to Hughes, when men do stay awake, it may actually be to get specific needs met.

“Perhaps men stay awake longer as an artifact of mate guarding — making sure the woman doesn’t leave them for another partner,” said Hughes. “Men may also stay awake longer in an attempt to entice their partner into having sex.”

Although researchers were able to get some clues about why people fall asleep immediately after sex, they admit there’s still more work to be done to get a full understanding of post-coital behaviors.

“The vast majority of the research on the evolutionary psychology of human reproduction focuses on what’s before and leading up to sexual intercourse,” Hughes said. “But reproductive strategies don’t end with intercourse; they may influence specific behaviors directly following sex.”

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Source:

Sleep vs. cuddling: Study looks at what happens after sex. ScienceDaily. https://www.sciencedaily.com/releases/2012/01/120121120112.htm