What Sex Conversations Do Couples Want to Avoid?

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Abstract

ncept-of-skeleton-in-the.html">DepositPhotos</a></figcaption></figure>According to Certified Sex Therapist Casey Tanner, it’s not surprising that the number of sexual <a href="https://readmedium.com/consumer-research-experience-resume-13b12bb7199d">partners</a> people have topped the list of the most uncomfortable topics to discuss with a partner, given the baggage that can be associated with this issue.“In reality, the numbers themselves aren’t the problem; you’ll meet someone who has slept with three people carrying just as much shame as someone who has slept with 50. The issue is the story we tell ourselves about our number — a story rooted in a larger cultural dynamic of sexism and purity culture,” Tanner explained. “If you do decide to share, there’s no objectively right or wrong time, but it’s important to have a foundation of <a href="https://readmedium.com/how-a-word-association-test-predicted-relationship-success-63a62e66c040">emotional</a> safety before asking someone else to share.”In fact, people were so uncomfortable sharing information about past lovers that 32 percent of survey respondents actually changed their number and 17 percent changed their own number in an attempt to match their partner’s. Why did they go through all this trouble? Twenty-one percent of participants said that fear of judgment from their partner was the motivating factor.“The issue is the story we tell ourselves about our number….” — Casey TannerDespite there still being several sticky topics that couples want to avoid talking about in their relationship, LELO Brand Manager Sara Kranjčec Jukić says it’s still encouraging that they recognize how important it is to have these conversations, uncomfortable though they may be.“<a href="https://readmedium.com/3-ways-to-use-emojis-when-communicating-with-potential-partners-on-dating-sites-c779e8d4219e">Communication</a> is the cornerstone to healthy and fulfilling sexual and <a href="https://readmedium.com/9-ideas-for-holiday-romance-d780fc7ab8ec">romantic</a> relationships and it is essential to remember that your partner is not a mind reader, and your wants and needs must be expressed or otherwise they may not be fulfilled,” she said. “Our sexual well-being is an important part of our lives and it shouldn’t be disregarded because it is a ‘touchy subject.’”More from Kiki Wellington:<div id="fcf4" class="link-block">

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    </div><p id="cced"><b>Sources:</b></p><p id="d69e">Turner, D. (2020, November 19). <i>What’s Your Number? Most People Lie About How Many People They’ve Had Sex With</i>. LELO. <a href="https://www.lelo.com/blog/sex-number-study/">https://www.lelo.com/blog/sex-number-study/</a></p><p id="8214"><i>What’s Your Number? New LELO Study Reveals That Most People Lie About Their Sexual History</i>. PR Newswire. <a href="https://www.prnewswire.com/news-releases/whats-your-number-new-lelo-study-reveals-that-most-people-lie-about-their-sexual-history-301185219.html">https://www.prnewswire.com/news-releases/whats-your-number-new-lelo-study-reveals-that-most-people-lie-about-their-sexual-history-301185219.html</a></p></article></body>

From kinks to sexual partner numbers, survey reveals what sex topics couples least want to talk about

As much as we may love whiling away the hours talking to our partner, there are just some topics we may not feel comfortable addressing — especially in the early stages of the relationship. Despite that, people recognize that having these conversations is important and needs to be done. To find out what these topics are, intimate lifestyle products company LELO asked 2,000 sexually active Americans what subjects they felt were most important to talk about with their partners, as well as which ones they least wanted to discuss.

“It is essential to remember that your partner is not a mind reader….” — Sara Kranjčec Jukić

When it came to topics that should be discussed in a relationship, respondents believed the following were the most important:

Sexual preferences (59 percent)

Consent (53 percent)

What they can do better in bed (41 percent)

Kinks (35 percent)

What I can do better in bed (34 percent)

When asked which topics they were least comfortable speaking to their partner about, these issues topped the least:

Number of sexual partners (45 percent)

Past sexual experiences (45 percent)

Sexual preferences (33 percent)

Kinks (32 percent)

What they can do better in bed (27 percent)

Past Partners, Present Problems

According to Certified Sex Therapist Casey Tanner, it’s not surprising that the number of sexual partners people have topped the list of the most uncomfortable topics to discuss with a partner, given the baggage that can be associated with this issue.

“In reality, the numbers themselves aren’t the problem; you’ll meet someone who has slept with three people carrying just as much shame as someone who has slept with 50. The issue is the story we tell ourselves about our number — a story rooted in a larger cultural dynamic of sexism and purity culture,” Tanner explained. “If you do decide to share, there’s no objectively right or wrong time, but it’s important to have a foundation of emotional safety before asking someone else to share.”

In fact, people were so uncomfortable sharing information about past lovers that 32 percent of survey respondents actually changed their number and 17 percent changed their own number in an attempt to match their partner’s. Why did they go through all this trouble? Twenty-one percent of participants said that fear of judgment from their partner was the motivating factor.

“The issue is the story we tell ourselves about our number….” — Casey Tanner

Despite there still being several sticky topics that couples want to avoid talking about in their relationship, LELO Brand Manager Sara Kranjčec Jukić says it’s still encouraging that they recognize how important it is to have these conversations, uncomfortable though they may be.

“Communication is the cornerstone to healthy and fulfilling sexual and romantic relationships and it is essential to remember that your partner is not a mind reader, and your wants and needs must be expressed or otherwise they may not be fulfilled,” she said. “Our sexual well-being is an important part of our lives and it shouldn’t be disregarded because it is a ‘touchy subject.’”

More from Kiki Wellington:

Sources:

Turner, D. (2020, November 19). What’s Your Number? Most People Lie About How Many People They’ve Had Sex With. LELO. https://www.lelo.com/blog/sex-number-study/