Of Ego BOOSTS, Envy, and Engagement

Confessions from a 7x boosted writer since September 2023

Update: just received an 8th boost!

Ruby Noir 😈asks: How do you measure success on Medium? Number of followers? Number of reads? Earnings? Email subscribers? Claps? Highlights? Boosts? Comments? What means the most to you?…

“I should be so lucky,” as Kylie Minogue once sang, right?

On one hand, I have indeed been quite fortunate. For those of you who don’t know my story (literally and figuratively), I didn’t begin writing actual stories, or rather articles, until late May after one of my cats, the glorious Duchess Georgiana, was unexpectedly euthanized. As I blogged about the lives of every single one of my departed cats for a book that I was planning to write on cat loss (that was ten stories on four cats), I was disappointed by the lack of views and reads. I felt fortunate just to get a 100 claps. So I decided that as soon as I completed my last story on my cats, I was going to leave.

But slowly, I began to discover publications, starting with Catness in June, before branching into other publications in mid-July. You can say it was a slow learning curve as I only began to hear about the importance of publications for views and the upcoming Boost program. It was then that I discovered The Storyteller’s Vault, A Taste for Life, In for a Penny, Modern Women, The Honest Perspective, Age of Empathy, Promptly Written, The Challenged and Read or Die.

There were promising signs by the end of August. This was when my story, How it Feels to be Asian Me was selected for Best Article at Promptly Written. Then in late September, I received my very first boost for Lessons I learned from my Osteoarthritis at Middle-Pause. Just two days later, I was notified that another story written a few weeks earlier, Back to my Future, had been boosted as well. Then three more came by biweekly intervals: Racism in the Ivory Tower at An Injustice; Help, Help, Help at Counter Arts; and A Ghosting we will Go Lessons from History. Finally, in December, I was boosted for The Skinny on Skinny Shaming on Fourth Wave and Holiday Cheers, Holiday Tears at The Challenged. I honestly did not expect so much: especially since the vast majority of these articles have been quite long, ranging between 7 minutes and 12! [Edit 1/1/2024: Just got The Last and Best Gift boosted!]

I was thrilled. After all, the vast majority of my writing since college had been academic — except for my half year at Substack in 2021 when I wrote about my grieving process after the death of my mother. (I have yet to complete the narrative.) But I suppose my book editing experience this past year had probably helped more than I realized as I learned to write in a more popular style — and of course, reading all of the great stories on Medium (more on that later). So, on that front, I’m happy and grateful to have accomplished as much as I have in that timespan.

Sometimes the Grass is Greener…

Yet, I have to admit that I am quite jealous of those who get thousands of views, claps, and earnings for stories of the same length: especially since I need the money so badly for my leaking roof! This is where I sorely wish I had a more attractive profile pic. I’m sure some of you have noticed as I have (won’t mention any names!), that more conventionally young and pretty white women (slim and/or blonde) — or PoC who conform to those standards — get far more attention! They have readers, particularly, men swarming to their comment section. (Although I suppose I’m not jealous of the sometimes unwelcome attention these female writers get too!)

Think I’m crazy? There’s evidence for this — if you didn’t already know that better looking women garner earn more and get promoted more often. In fact, a Medium writer has also commented on this phenomenon in her article.

Hmmm…perhaps that’s why I’m not drawing tens of thousands of views on my boosted articles? Why I’m left to languish and not getting hundreds of comments? Ah, to be blonde and gorgeous! Maybe it’s time for plastic surgery? Or more simply…a re-VAMPed AI avatar? (Seriously, this has been suggested in another Medium article too!)

This feeling of abject failure, of being fucked in the physical gene pool, however, is counterbalanced by the fact that in several publications where I post very long stories, I do manage to get far more views and claps than others, even when not boosted. So, yes, I can achieve — in spite of appearances!

I am happiest when…

Nonetheless, at the end of the day, it’s not the claps or views that matter. Or the money. And believe it or not, not even the boosts.

It’s the combination of thoughtful comments and highlights I get on my stories. I am never so thrilled as when someone shows they truly understand and appreciate my points. Or perhaps more importantly, when they understand my feelings and emotions. Over the past few months, there have been a number of comments that have provided fresh, enlightening perspectives — and have helped to inspire me further.

Because, let’s face it, boosts can sometimes be unpredictable. We’ve all encountered surprises when one story we truly liked got a much more favorable response than another which we didn’t value as highly.

In fact, there is a recent one I’d written on an obscure 18th-century English anarchist that I hoped would get boosted: I thought it was pretty brilliant at drawing the parallels between inequality then and now. (Yes, inequality is a huge issue today!) It was backed up to the gills — like my other essays on history, literature, and politics — with facts and stats. Responders seemed to admire it too. (Hey, boost curators/gods/goddesses, please, please read it — even if you don’t boost it!)

Instead, a shorter article that I had written at the spur of the moment received the coveted boost. But hell, I’m not going to complain. It was the best (and only) Christmas present I got this year!

So, what is real success?

Ultimately, I think the true measure of success lies in how much we’ve learned and improved. Because success, as I’ve argued elsewhere, can only be assessed on a more internalized scale than external one: “have you given the best of yourself, regardless of the obstacles?”

Quite arrogantly, I didn’t think it was possible for me to be a better writer than I already was. After all, I’d been teaching for over 20 years and published a book along with a number of articles. I’d even gotten compliments from Jay Parini, a distinguished professor, critic, novelist, and poet! And as mentioned earlier, I began editing books when I wasn’t teaching. What else could I learn?

Actually, quite a lot. Here, on Medium, I was struck not only by fresh insights (I didn’t think I could learn any more!) and the experiences of so many writers around the world, but the excellent crafting of essays and stories with an effective beginning, middle, and end. I marveled at the way in which even very short stories, both fiction and nonfiction, were able to incorporate suspense, climax, and resolution. I relished the ready wit, puns, and well-constructed prose. To my surprise, I frequently found myself thinking, “damn, why didn’t I think of that?”

It wasn’t until I recently looked at a letter I had written for promotion at work that I noticed a significant difference. The sentences and paragraphs were all very long, cluttered with a number of adverbs and prepositional phrases; sometimes, paragraphs occupied as much as 3/4ths of a single-spaced page. The latter was not unusual — it was my typical, academic writing style, one I had used for years. And although I doubt I will apply my Medium writing style 100% to my academic work, I believe my newly acquired skills will add an oomph to it. I felt like Jekyll encountering his more youthful, direct side, Hyde.

I may have lost my sweet Georgie in May, but I gained all of you in return. I’d like to give a special shout-out to some folks whose writing and support I’ve come to enjoy regularly during my time on Medium. There are no doubt a few more that my stressed-out brain has probably forgotten. Here’s a toast to everyone! This list is in chronological order of acquaintance:

Karen Schwartz (I admired your tribute to Skye which I read after having lost Georgie), Lynn L. Alexander (You are the best punster around, HANDS DOWN!) But I am also always moved whenever I read about your mother.) Patrice Walker (You embody abundance to the core!) Adrian CDTPPW (who knows, maybe one day you’ll be the CEO of Medium!), Randy Pulley (you are witty, charming and sharp as a knife!) Jimwebster (bravo to a fellow Oxonian and great writer, and thank you for teaching us about boosts!), Sweet Honeylu (your knack for story-telling backed up by research make your stories on badass women have been such a treat to read!) Nathan Chen (I always enjoy your positivity and your insight on Asian life!) @Ashlynn T. (I love your whimsical, informative stories on NYC and Christmas!) Johnny Poitras (you are young but wise! I always enjoy reading your stories and comments!) Britt E. (You write some of the best, most suspenseful fiction around on Medium — always a treat!) Toni The Talker (you are a superb writer who’s also taught me about the ins-and-outs of Medium!) Sophia Tell- Stories 🤓📢🤓(Your stories are always such brief, but perfectly packed gems brimming with insight!) ✅ Doc Samurai Sam 🍿(I always look forward to seeing your emoji in my comments! Your positivity and insight always shine through!) OCTAVIA EVER AFTER (I love your intelligence and passion!) Amanda Melheim (finish up that doctoral dissertation — I KNOW it’s going to be outstanding!) Shanté Nixon (I am always struck by your well-informed stories on race — and life!), Deb C. (I LOVE your badass politics: you’re always on target!) Maria Rattray (you are so gifted with intelligence, wisdom, and empathy!) Victoria Kjos (your stories on Medium never fail to teach me good strategies!) Bette A. Ludwig 🔍 (I love your snark and insight!) B.R. Shenoy (Thanks for your great writing and photography — always a treat!)

And also a great holiday cheer for all the superb pub editors I’ve worked with this year: Louise Peacock, Melanie J., Chelsea Marie, ADEOLA SHEEHY-ADEKALE, Jason Edmunds, Nancy Oglesby, Marilyn Flower, Debbie Walker, Nicole Bedford, Zuva Seven, Reece Beckett, Sadie Seroxcat, June Kirri, Patsy Fergusson, Daniel G. Jennings, Sal, Christian Nelson, Samuel Sullivan