Summary

Dennett, a caregiver and vegetarian with multiple food restrictions, struggles to balance her dietary needs with those of her dialysis-patient partner, Ben, leading to personal health complications and frustration with the complexities of their contrasting diets.

Abstract

In the 17th chapter of "Our Dialysis Story," Dennett details the challenges she faces in managing her diet alongside her partner Ben's strict renal diet. Ben's diet, necessitated by dialysis, is high in protein but low in sodium, potassium, and phosphorus, with additional restrictions due to diabetes. Dennett's own dietary limitations, including vegetarianism, food allergies, IBS, and colitis, compound the difficulty of preparing meals that cater to both their needs. The effort to find suitable recipes and the time spent shopping and cooking have led to significant food waste and personal health issues for Dennett, who has resorted to fasting and consuming bland foods to alleviate digestive problems caused by eating foods that irritate her conditions. The narrative reveals the emotional and physical toll of navigating complex dietary restrictions while caring for a loved one with severe health issues.

Opinions

Dennett expresses frustration with the extensive research and trial-and-error required to accommodate Ben's dietary restrictions while adhering to her own.
She feels overwhelmed by the time and energy spent on meal preparation and grocery shopping, which has led to increased food waste.
Dennett acknowledges that her own health has suffered as a result of mindless eating and consuming foods that are not suitable for her dietary needs.
There is a sense of resignation and exhaustion in her desire to stop eating completely, highlighting the emotional strain of managing two sets of complex dietary restrictions.
Dennett's body's negative reaction to foods outside her dietary restrictions underscores the severity of her conditions and the importance of maintaining a strict diet.
The author's experience suggests that caregivers may neglect their own health while focusing on the needs of their dependents, emphasizing the importance of self-care even under challenging circumstances.

Ben’s Diet Made Me Sick

Our dialysis story — chapter 17

As a dialysis patient, Ben has diet restrictions. Mostly, high protein and very low sodium, potassium, and phosphorus. And he’s diabetic.

Prior to dialysis, his diet was limited due to his pickiness and his diabetes. He mostly consumed beef, potatoes, lettuce, tomatoes, radishes, bananas, watermelon, tuna, yogurt, bread, graham crackers, Glucerna, protein bars, and whatever I baked. He also liked canned Progresso soups — but only three types.

Since dialysis, he can’t have any potatoes, bananas, or watermelon and can only have very limited amounts of tomatoes, radishes, anything dairy, protein bars that contain nuts (all the ones he likes have nuts), Glucerna, or anything canned.

Do you see my dilemma?

To increase his protein, besides beef, he’s eating more eggs, chicken, and pork, but I have to get very creative for that to happen. He also reluctantly eats more rice. I let him have a total of 6 cherry tomatoes and 6 thin radish slices on his salads each week. Otherwise, he’d only be eating lettuce as a vegetable. I also let him have one can of low-sodium soup that doesn’t contain potatoes or tomatoes and one container of yogurt each week. He’s decreased his Glucerna from two a day to one. And I have to be very careful about the ingredients in the items I bake.

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Still, his blood tests show he’s getting too much phosphorus.

I’m spending an incredible amount of time researching foods and recipes for his limited diet, going grocery shopping several times a week, and cooking. There’s a lot of trial-and-error going on in our kitchen and, I hate to admit, a lot of food going to waste.

I’m a vegetarian. I also have food allergies, IBS, and colitis. My restrictions are:

any meat, including fish wheat (limited) oranges olives (but olive oil is okay) melons bananas raw vegetables (very limited) peppers, onions, and garlic — raw or cooked (limited) anything greasy, like chips all cruciferous vegetables (cauliflower, broccoli, Brussels sprouts, etc) anything spicy raw fruit (limited)

I can’t eat most of what Ben eats or what he refuses to eat. That’s why there’s so much waste, which I hope will decrease as I find recipes that work for his restrictions and his tastes.

Photo by S O C I A L . C U T on Unsplash

It’s been too much to keep up with his restrictions and mine. I’m really tired of thinking about and preparing food. By the time I put together a meal for Ben, I have no time, energy, or interest in preparing a meal for myself.

I’ve been mindlessly grazing or eating some of what I prepare for Ben, including too many salads and spiced-up rice. I have a bowl of washed grapes always in the refrigerator for Ben, and I grab a handful several times a day. One handful might be okay for my system but several is an overload. Salads of raw vegetables several times a week create havoc in my colon. I even ate potato chips that a client offered me the other day. Potato chips! I never eat chips and I shouldn’t eat chips.

I’m eating more than usual but not eating well, and I always feel hungry. Hence, the damn potato chips.

Photo by Emiliano Vittoriosi on Unsplash

Not surprisingly, my body revolted.

For two weeks my digestive system has been very unhappy. None of the over-the-counter digestive remedies that I tried worked. Finally, I stopped eating. It was the only way to cleanse my body of what I shouldn’t have eaten.

One day of fasting. Two days of very small amounts of non-irritating, bland foods.

Today is my fourth day and the first one when I haven’t felt sick. Not 100% well but much, much better than I was. I’ll add a little bit more food to my diet today and see how I do.

I think salads, too many grapes, and rice cooked with onions and garlic, as well as those damn potato chips, were my downfall.

Somehow I need to find a way to take care of myself and my diet while also taking care of Ben and his diet. And I have no idea how to accomplish that. I simply don’t have the time or the energy to do more than I’m doing.

What would I like to do? Stop eating — completely.

Life would be so much simpler without food.