My Friend Found This Red Flag on Her Boyfriend’s Cell Phone
It’s something women should check for when dating.
My friend shows me her cell phone.
“That’s not good,” I say.
“I know,” she says.
We’re out with a group of girls.
She’s trying to have fun but she’s bummed. She’d rather be with her guy because she thought they had a date scheduled. They’ve been seeing each other for a month. It’s been a rapid relationship.
They seem crazy about one another.
Until now.
She’s confused by this.
He seems to be putting on the brakes. She attempts to clear things up with him but the conversation goes nowhere. Instead, she tries to address the confusion about the date.
Here’s where things get crazy.
You either need to shake your head at his stupidity.
Or he arrogantly doesn’t care.
The dumbass (sorry but in this case, there’s no other word for what he did) attempts to cover his ass by forwarding her a text conversation between the two of them.
My friend reads it.
He believes it proves they didn’t have a formal commitment on this night. He thinks he’s making it clear he did nothing wrong. He’s off the hook and she’s making too big a deal of this.
The dumbass neglects to delete how he’s got her listed in his contacts.
He’s given her a man’s name.
In his defense, he’s been clever enough to start the man’s name with the first three letters of her name. It’s definitely a good way to remember which woman you’ve created this particular man’s moniker for.
My friend is devastated.
“I’m sorry,” I say. “But we know this isn’t a good sign. There’s likely only one reason a man would list you in his phone under a man’s name.”
“Yes,” she says.
“He’s seeing other women,” I say.
She texts him back.
I’m paraphrasing but it was essentially, “What the hell?! Why am I listed in your phone under that name?”
No response.
It’s been nearly two weeks.
The moral of this story is obvious.
If you’re dating a guy you might want to determine how you’re listed in his contacts. If he’s given you a nickname or a man’s name or something else that makes zero sense it’s a red flag.
He’s either married, dating someone seriously, or seeing multiple people.
My friend fought back tears.
It’s disappointing to find out someone isn’t who you thought they were.
It’s worse when you believe the relationship felt like something special. It makes it harder to let go of. In that way, breakups were easier when we were sixteen.
We were more resilient in some ways.
She knows she deserves better.
But the heart has no reason.
We’ve tried to dissect what made things in their relationship take a turn. It more than likely happened when she began asking if they were committed to one another.
She was ready to jump off the dating app.
In retrospect, after realizing he was making her incognito on his cell phone, I have to wonder if something else might have contributed to it. She had stopped by his house one day unexpectedly.
A man who is keeping the playing field open can’t have that.
But does it matter?
He did her a favor.
My friend is beautiful, fun, funny, smart, and many other good things. She gets more than her fair share of attention from men.
It’s his loss…
But sadly, her broken heart makes it feel like hers.