avatarJ & J (Jessica & Joshua J. Lyon, BSQP, CNP)

Summary

The text discusses the concept of the "perfectly developed man" and the importance of moving on from past relationships to fully engage in a new partnership, emphasizing the need for emotional and spiritual severance from exes.

Abstract

The article, titled "The Ex Talk Breakdown: Start Your Engines!", is the first part of a 4-part series exploring the idea of the "perfectly developed man." It challenges the notion that a woman's exes should remain a significant presence in her life, suggesting that holding onto the past hinders the formation of a true bond with a new partner. The author argues that a woman should view her past relationships as concluded, allowing her to fully commit to a new, spiritually aligned connection. The text underscores the importance of transparency and honesty in new relationships, while also advocating for a clean break from previous partners to ensure a healthy and victorious future together.

Opinions

  • The author believes that a woman's focus on her ex indicates a lack of commitment to her current relationship and can be detrimental to building a strong connection with a new partner.
  • The concept of a "perfectly developed man" is introduced as someone who expects his partner to be fully present and not emotionally entangled with her past.
  • The author expresses that real men encourage growth and development in their partners, expecting them to be feminine and developed women in return.
  • There is a strong opinion against maintaining friendships with exes, viewing it as a form of disloyalty and a barrier to fully embracing a new relationship.
  • The text suggests that holding onto the past, particularly through ongoing connections with exes, can prevent personal and relational victory.
  • The author emphasizes the importance of spiritual alignment in a relationship, indicating that God's view of partnership should be the guiding principle for moving forward.
  • The article posits that women should sever ties with their exes, both for their own well-being and to honor the sanctity of their current relationship.
  • The author criticizes the societal acceptance of stepfathers as secondary parental figures, advocating for a more definitive and primary role for men in children's lives.
  • The text implies that men are willing to protect and provide for their partners, but expect loyalty and a clear break from past relationships in return.

The Ex Talk Breakdown: Start Your Engines!

It’s the moldy lettuce in the back of your fridge, it’s time to take it out.

This is Part 1 of the 4-part single-topic Medium story: Is There a Perfectly Developed Man?

Photo by Lukas Medvedevas from Pexels

It’s true that women who are marriage material make strong mem rise up and make weak men crack and dry up.

Let’s kick this awesome story-series off with breaking a myth.

If your ex is in the picture still, you are with a meerkat, not a lion. No exceptions. You just cut his balls off.

But, congratulations on your relationship! That’s so great!

Not.

Anyways.

The VICTOR (the only perfectly developed man — a little spoiler) hates a woman’s exes, because at some point, one of the other three men as you will read in Part 2, were inside her, due to her judgement that they were good men, and that’s cringe and BS, to say the least. “Now they stand next to me?” the victor says. “I think, f-no. Now I’m scared her brain will tweak and she’ll make another bad move.”

We can’t trust you unless you know who God has placed you with. My heart’s not being transplanted to you unless you’re ready. Let’s take this from one of my older posts:

To reiterate. If there is trauma I understand and give all the needed grace your brain requires to heal. Key word is “heal”, not “postpone”, “think about it”, or “oh, it is unnecessary, you have to live with me this way, it’s who I am”. Hearts are severed completely and cleaned thoroughly before transplanted wholly into the other, completely owned by that new recipient (per the Bible, marriage, is “dying to myself” and “my body is yours” and the U.S. Law of heart transplants states the heart does not belong to the donor anymore — because the donor died). I want a heart transplant, regardless how ugly you might think yours is, I want it. Let me carry you. I choose it. I would not choose yours if I did not want yours.

I don’t care how thick your past is. I’m a freaking warrior, I got you. Your past is no factor. The only factor is, is your past, your past? Or is it your present?

We are your 1 MAN, now. In our mind, you have no ex — rather, you have been rescued and we do not want to hear about your captor and Stockholm Syndrome (in the beginning when we are getting to know you, yes, sure, because you need to talk about it, to get it out and in the open. And for us to also be transparent with our story, too, of how we “kick a** and chew bubble gum”. Honesty and transparency builds connection and friendship. The reason we share our backgrounds has differences, neurologically, per gender). It’s only about getting to know you. Not living a rerun.

But, you are severed by GOD from him and God does not see you and him as anything. If God did, you both would still be in a permanent vow and bond. You know, marriage? God made it, neither you nor I did. Whether you can follow God shows me if you are ready or still a girl clinging to her male friends — I mean father. Point is, if you are spiritually connected, you and I are cheating. If you are connected with me, spiritually, it’s you and him that are cheating.

God made a woman’s brain to wrap around one man. It’s time to move on. Wrap around me or be chained to them forever.

Leaders could not care less, really. The male brain can be studied by studying combat. And in military special operation training, the instructors encourage everyone to quit and go home. That’s what men do with you. Real men. We attract you just by being developed, it’s your job to give us a reason to strap us together in a single parachute and go cover you emotionally, physically, and spiritually. And that’s easy, too. Just be feminine. Be a developed woman.

You are single, not divorced or “broken”. God forgave and forgot, so you should, too. I’m sure you got the forgiven part down — now it’s time to forget. That’s the hard part. He has been your validation for so long, your captor. That might take some therapy. But, what would you do for a great life?

Let him go. Bye-bye. If you want connection with your ex, marry him again. It’s evident he was a great man, you’re still with him in spirit. You still respond to him, quote him, defend him, and think about him. I’ve said this before, your ex is sh*t. I know it, the world knows it, and God knows it. God said “let no man separate” and God separated it, so give it to God.

Because men don’t use you and leave you. Men die beside you. Men make the vow the moment you make their brain explode with neurological reactions.

He is a balloon. Cut the GD string and let him go where he naturally will. Or, be that country girl and get on his ATV.

Part of moving on, is you owning that. A good man doesn’t settle with a woman who is lost. She ends up being all paranoid and will eventually take the reins and get you both lost, then blame you for not being a man.

Victory begets victory. Victors beget victors. Join me.

Either hop on the back of my ATV or not. In the country, she does get on your ATV with the whole world watching and she owns it. Country women will let you look like a fool in front of everyone and watch you drown without moving a muscle if she did not like you. She will watch you die like a man. At your last breath she will give a salute out of respect.

That is beautiful! If I can say so myself.

I seen this woman one time at Wal-Mart and I did a little experiment after assessing that she was a huntress, a true woman. As we walked towards each other, I said “Hi” and began to slow. She, with her Nike baseball cap and straightened hair, just kept walking as if I was a ghost.

That is the standard. That is what I search for in a woman. No words. No hat tilt. No emotion towards them. Nada. She knew that she was sold. And she held the line, not thinking that she’s missing something.

NO MAN wants friendship unless he’s lonely.

And here I am with the bulls**it title, “stepfather” to this:

Photo by RODNAE Productions from Pexels

What a great image to teach children. “Hey kid, this is God’s definition of father. Actually, it’s not, but F-it, I do whatever I want — which is how we ended up here in the first place”…

“Hey kid, your sperm donor can be a devil and your mother’s next husband, Jesus Christ, and he’ll be called ‘stepfather’, meaning, he’s a meerkat and will always come in second place to your male babysitter. Whatever he says, your mother will hop-to.”

We have said before that women only defend who they love, and you keep talking about him. Pick a man to follow and quote, don’t quote your “male friend” from work, either — we men will think he’s not a friend and will know division has begun.

We will think: Time to defend my home to make sure there is no hole in the perimeter. And to make our perimeter secure, ALL threats must be neutralized or he’ll kill us both. Might take 10 years, but it’ll happen. He’s your next husband already.

I guess you did not know what you wanted.

In Recap

The ex talk is important to just get to learn about the other. But really, I don’t need to know him. I’d rather think you were a virgin. If you are or not, you are to us. You are given a clean slate. I don’t actually need to hear about him at all. But, if there’s a situation in which something can pop up, yes, we need to know. That includes diseases. If there’s any stowaway, we need to know so we can prepare.

But again, he doesn’t exist. Get over it. Or go back to him.

Like I said in the other post, I’m here for as long as it takes. But, life is not a pond, life is a river, let’s get moving. OR (one more, I’m sorry), don’t follow me. If you are not following me, you are following him or letting him stop you (still following his lead because we know he’s not doing anything spectacular and he’s having no development; you are not making your own decisions).

Last thing I will mention. There are times when parenting has worked out with both sets of parents in the picture. However, there is a level of stress on the both parents that comes with them. Many times kids will get a preference of what parent they’re going to listen to. It’s natural for kids to gear towards one parental authority couple — and that’s usually one spouse from one couple and the other spouse from the other couple.

My #1 comedy:

Love
Relationships
Forgiveness
Healing
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