Pandora’s Box

A fictionalized account of a woman who opened the legendary box.

Yesterday I opened Pandora’s box. This is what I found.

Wrath

I snapped at my husband yesterday after he put the milk carton back in the fridge and it was empty.

Empty! Who does that?!

I may have been a bit harsh and told him he was an inconsiderate twit. I apologized shortly after but still, that bit of anger was SO uncharacteristic of me! and it took me by surprise.

Gluttony

I admit it. I ate the last cupcake.

It just looked so good sitting there with its swirly buttercream topping and buttery vanilla sponge. I could practically taste the euphoria of flavors bursting to life on my tongue before I’d even taken a bite.

So really, could you blame me for the lack of self-control?

Greed

I hogged the blankets.

I’m a shameless blanket hog. There was more than enough blanket to cover both of us, but I wrapped myself up tight like a blanket burrito. I felt terrible when I realized that my husband was left out in the cold and shivering!

Envy

My best friend showed me a photo of her new house and it has a swimming pool. Why does she get a swimming pool and we have a tiny little house that doesn’t even have room for a third bedroom? Why does she get everything while I’m struggling?

I work harder than her, I deserve it more.

Wait, no, that’s not fair. She’s earned everything she’s got. I should be happy for her, not seething with jealousy. What is wrong with me today?!

Sloth

I didn’t bother getting out of bed until afternoon today.

I had so much that I needed to do but I just couldn’t be bothered. I threw myself down on the sofa, ignored all the chores piling up, and binge-watched baking shows on Netflix. There’s a mountain of washing piled up behind me.

Ah well, that’s a problem for tomorrow’s me.

Pride

I beat my husband’s score on this mobile game we both play, and I could not stop bragging about it. I was a bit embarrassed afterward because the way I carried on, you would think I won a world championship title or something. Not beat my husband’s pathetic score on a word game.

I could have done with turning down my ego by a notch or two.

Lust

I think we may be getting into TMI territory here, but I couldn’t help it. My husband looked so good last night that I just had to drag him to the bedroom. Now I think of it, that’s probably why I slept in until the afternoon!

Yesterday I opened Pandora’s box.

It turned out that the Greek antique my grandmother brought back from one of her many holidays four decades ago was more than just a little trinket box.

Only my grandmother could go on a discount holiday to Greece and bring back a piece of Greek legend without knowing it!

And only I could open the legendary box and let loose the seven evils and only realize after the fact!

Don’t worry, I’ve shut it now.

I love, love, love Greek mythology and the legend of Pandora’s Box is so iconic that I just had to write a little fic about it. The account in this story is from a fictionalized character, not me, so no my husband has not been putting empty cartons of milk into the fridge…this week anyway!

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