GOP’s Thoughts and Prayers: Sacrificing 4th Graders to the 2nd Amendment

Well, if the House of Representatives haven’t gone and got themselves a brand new Speaker. From all indications, he will not last long and he will do his best to defund the government while making it illegal to have been born gay or a woman or a Muslim, for starters. He’s been dubbed Maga Mike and rumor has it that he’s a real Johnson. To say his political leaning is toward a supremely white Christian theocracy replete with a mandated side of state religion, might under state how much of his right of center lunacy he sees as just hometown spittin’ an whittlin’.

The jury is out on whether MagaBoy is well-enough armored to withstand the bloodbath he’s about to experience. I doubt that he’ll receive many wounds from the blues. I suspect that nearly every wound will come from his own pack. It is not likely that he can see that he has been offered up as a sacrifice to the famed base. Even if no one knows what the hell that is. I suppose that’s fair though, because no one knows who the woke people are and I doubt that ANTIFA is anything more than a fever dream for those who find both mud racing and wrestling wholesome and satisfying expressions of proud rebellion against something. Maybe wearing shoes and getting up in the morning? Rebelling against shoes and alarm clocks is no more foolish than claiming one is righteous because of a personal relationship with the creator and founding member of Theological Club and golf complex.

There is a wonderfully likely possibility that Mikey has been set up to take the fall for the inevitable government shutdown that the Freedom Caucus Tin Hats, who all have hard-ons to claim as proof of a loyal life to be lived, for the one and only head MAGAT D. Jailbird Tramp.

Here’s the question I have: how do these folks think about what they say they want to do? They all sing that stupid and macabre song about thoughts and prayers while every day multiple random people are murdered in groups by stupid young men with weapons which they are not qualified to own. Their disqualification comes about simply because of how those young men use the weapons. It ain’t a behavior which can be associated with maturity, that much is obvious.

The last American civilization to glorify human sacrifice was the Aztecs. I would hope that Magadoodles can understand that even Hernan Cortez thought that practice was barbaric. Bill Engvall’s solution has a certain appeal, but then those folks in Washington are pretty uptight about members wearing proper colors. I don’t know if a sign would be allowed but it surely would make sorting out the bull crap easier, wouldn’t it? I mean if you saw even Hannity interviewing someone with a stupid sign around their neck you’d have to know to take what the interviewee said with a grain of salt, wouldn’t you?

The thing that marks mentally challenged folks for me is when someone can only manage one description of the world. I have to wonder if the real reason for such an extreme limitation is a lack of mental ability or if it’s the effect of a sheltered life. But neither of those explanations pass the plausibility test and that leaves me with the next most likely explanation. Money. Even that explanation leaves lots of questions in its wake. For example, A** Kissing Kevin can shake his money maker and fund a whole bunch of campaigns. So why did Ms. Gaetze’s little boy Matty engineer Poor old Kevin’s demise? Matty might think of himself as an engineer, but I don’t think he has a license for driving the Gravy Train that keeps the wheels turning in swing districts which puts the majority in jeopardy in about a year. And for more reasons than this.

More Americans than not want background checks that screen gun buyers. More Americans than not want women to decide if they want to or can afford a baby. More Americans than not want a pathway to citizenship for Dreamers. More Americans than not want action to eradicate mass murder by lunatics who are mentally challenged. No Americans want to nourish nightmares of third graders waiting in their class room for their turn to be torn apart by the bullets of a military grade weapon. More Americans than not want people like Elon and Jeff and Warren and Bill to pay more taxes than the rest of us because they figured out how to be in the right place at the right time or they made the right place and time. Either way they can cough up a thank you to the system that brought them such financial recognition. They can’t be all that greedy at this late stage. So why would Matty want to prevent them from paying what they even think is their fair share by trumping up a scripted complaint about Kevinsies? (Sorry, I just couldn’t pass that one up). But I do have to wonder if Ms. Gaetz’s baby boy has a deal with the gun lobby to replace the Azz Kizzer Kevin? They say to follow the money… Just astin’.

The last question that is bothering me is why would the majority party in the United States of America’s House of Representatives choose a Speaker of the House who champions state control of wombs? Why, you ask? Well, what the man said was that would give white untanned management men, young stock, to form in the corporate image, which is most desirable without the need to learn or understand Spanish, for example. In other words he thinks that if women had all the babies that he thinks they should, he would not have to countenance immigration. Did I mention that this guy is a real Johnson?

The ideals which the mentally limited side of the aisle is championing cannot be winning hands. They are not popular ideals with people who vote. There is a demographic who cheer voluminously for the likes of Maga Mikey because he likes what they think they like. But there are more Americans than not who consider the ideals espoused by Maga Mikey as limited and limiting beyond what they willingly wish to support with their vote. I have a hard time visualizing Matti boy as a 3D chess master. I don’t have any difficulty visualizing him as conspiracy curious with a touch of sleazy gossip, who really would like to show daddy how something is done. That is not only not a winning hand, it doesn’t have any mojo. So how did the Freedomites go for Maga Mikey? The only reason I can see is they need a sacrificial lamb to offer up to the gods of political ineptitude.

It’s hard to grasp how the land of the brave has surrendered to the spectacle of human sacrifice to appease the most limited, in terms of understanding the vast numbers of facets or reality which are possible to describe. That a politician can describe a supposed Christian Theocracy reality is not a great accomplishment. Could that same man also describe a Democratic reality where his opinion is merely one of many he might choose to explore? How many realities can that man who wishes to represent us, describe? That would be a measure of his stature which would carry gravitas. What a silly reality Maga Mikey wants to describe. Maybe Mikey would like to include women in his description of reality. What could it hurt, Mikey?

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