Editor’s Choice — Top 10: A Writer’s Psychology Is One of Extreme Duality

Let’s have a look at our top 10 stories today

Betsy Lerner is a professional editor, literary agent, and author. She has worked for Simon & Schuster as well. She thinks every writer’s psychology is one of extreme duality:

The writer labors in isolation, yet all that intensive, lonely work in the service of communicating, is an attempt to reach another person. ~ Betsy Lerner

I am trying to tell you something. Not just you, but a whole lot of people. This piece may become part of my book. But at this time, I am alone. For most of the day, I’ve been staring at the blank screen — alone.

While writing these words, I feel insecure. I have no idea if anybody is going to read it at all. I fear nobody will read it, and I hope everybody reads it — at the same time.

It makes me think. At times, I want to quit. I want to lash out, ‘If you are not going to read my work, then that’s it. I quit.’ But these conflicts are a part of a writer’s life.

In her book, The Forest for the Trees, Betsy Lerner says, “When an editor works with an author, she cannot help seeing into the medicine cabinet of his soul. All the terrible emotions, the desire for vindications, the paranoia, and the projection are bottled in there, along with all the excesses of envy, desire for revenge, all the hypochondriacal responses, rituals, defenses, and the twin obsessions with sex and money. In other words, the stuff of great books.”

Did you notice how your inner conflict makes you a writer? Your ability to see life from two or more perspectives — that conflict with one another — makes you a good writer.

What is it that a writer really wants? Why do they say there is a writer in every reader?

Like all human beings, a writer wants to be loved. A writer wants to be understood. When people treat you poorly — or you do not get the love you wished — you want to tell the world that you are to be treated with respect, with love.

You want to write as clearly as possible that you matter.

Betsy Lerner says, “…but every person who does serious time with a keyboard is attempting to translate his version of the world into words so that he might be understood.”

When people around you don’t understand you, you want to reach anyone who can. That is when you sit alone and write.

You are alone, but you are trying to connect — with all the people here, there, and in the future. That is what Betsy Lerner calls ‘extreme duality.’

In your lonely act of communication, you sit, and you keep on writing. Hoping it makes sense. And when you have told others about who you are, you feel satisfaction that comes alive whenever anyone reads your work.

“The world doesn’t fully make sense until the writer has secured his version of it on the page. And the act of writing is strangely more lifelike than life,” Betsy Lerner writes.

Let’s have a look at our top 10 stories by writers who know how to use the inner conflict:

10. A Writer Who Doesn’t Read is a Contradiction in Terms

Carbon Radio.

They are good writers. Their writing style is conversational and very engaging. Don’t forget to check their other work.

Stephen J. Mexal is a writer and a professor of English at California State University, Fullerton. His bylines have appeared in Pacific Standard, The Chronicle of Higher Education, Smithsonian, and elsewhere. He is the author or editor of three books, all about the intersection of writing, politics, and the American west.

9. How I Developed My Abilities to Avoid Doing Lots of Work

I wrote this one.

You have to be a shirker to really capture the spirit of working hard. The right way to work hard is not so hard after all.

Are you working harder than you need to? Let us see how avoiding work can make you develop a different sort of muscle.

8. Intense Warmth at the Concert Hall

Agnes Laurens is a writer. She writes for the local newspaper. Agnes lives in The Netherlands, with her husband and three daughters.

She is a good writer. Her style is natural, personal, and charming. Do check her other work.

Mysterious, excited, and yet, the darkness of the notes, while in the mids of nature, you’re running through the field.

7. Why Do Men Stay In Abusive Relationships?

Mila. Writer, Marketing Professional, Role Model, and just ultra-cool babe. I’m fearless. I’m a writer. I don’t quit. I use my imagination to inspire others!

She is a good writer. Her writing style is frank, easy to read, and engaging. Do check her other work.

My good friend is in an abusive relationship. After five months of indecisiveness, he finally had his first session with the therapist. He admitted that he is a man who is being abused by his pregnant girlfriend.

After two hours he received this advice — if she wasn’t pregnant, his therapist would advise him to take some time on his own to rebuild his boundaries because she believes that he is being emotionally, psychologically and at times physically abused by his girlfriend.

6. How to Stop Being a People Pleaser All of The Time

Khadejah says, “I write about life lessons, writing, social justice, and productivity. New articles published daily.”

She is an excellent writer. Her writing style is charming and engaging. Don’t miss this beautiful piece and read her other work.

My first college roommate was a mess.

She’d always trash the room. She never went to class. She brought her boyfriend over a million times (sometimes doing things in the bedroom). And she kept trying to fit in too damn much.

5. My Husband Says He Married Me Because I Was Putting Out, A Lot

Toni Crowe. Sarcastic escaped executive. Best-selling author. Writes whatever she wants.

She is an excellent writer. Her writing style is honest, flowing, and very engaging. Don’t miss this piece.

The subject of why we choose our lifetime spouses came up in conversation. My husband and I were chatting about what we think our grandchildren will look for in a spouse. We postulated how that seeking differs from what we wanted. My husband and I met in the free-love seventies in our twenties.

4. The Truth About Worry and Your Health

Bill Abbate is a leadership writer and executive coach.

He is a good writer. His writing style is logical, informative, and very engaging. Please check his other work.

What would it be like to live a life without worry? Can you imagine that? It would be like living in a near-perfect world!

Unfortunately, a worry-free world does not exist on this earth. Yet how much of our worry is unfounded?

3. 10 Reasons White People Don’t Want To Talk About Racism

Rebecca Stevens A. says, “I write about racism, but there are so many other things I would like to write about instead. Help me dismantle racism so that I can get to that.”

She is an excellent writer. Her writing style is direct, honest, and engaging. Do check her other work.

I’ve been publicly writing about racism for over a year. I’ve shared my articles on my social media platforms for all my friends, colleagues, and acquaintances to see. What has really shocked me is the total silence of most of my white friends and colleagues when it comes to discussing overall racism and acts of racism that I have experienced.

2. What If There’s Hope to Improve Immunity

Dr. Mehmet Yildiz. Technologist, Cognitive Scientist, Transhumanist empowering writers. Founder of ILLUMINATION, curating key messages.

He is an accomplished writer. His writing style is informative, direct, and very engaging. Do check his other work.

This powerful supplement is not hype. It is not a commercial pitch. And it is not a prescription drug. But it is as effective as medication for some health conditions proven by multiple clinical studies provided in the reference section of this article.

1. Seven Signs You’ve Accidentally Gone from Investing to Gambling

Tim Denning. Aussie Blogger with 500M+ views — Writer for CNBC & Business Insider. Inspiring the world through Personal Development and Entrepreneurship.

He is an excellent writer. His writing style is honest, direct and extremely engaging. Do check his other work.

He has only 212,000 followers yet.

Four years in love. A beautiful anniversary dinner, and I couldn’t eat a bite.

One of my favorite Youtubers ripped my heart out and left it on the floor still pumping blood. There were accusations of wrong-doing. Nobody believed them. There’s just no way an honest guy with a wife and kid could turn into a scammer, surely?

The last seven top 10

This post is part of the Top 10 Series — you can meet 500+ top writers with these links:

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Final Thoughts

If your story was selected in the Top 10, please share another story with a brief introduction and a short convincing review — in the comments. (Please write the review in the third person and start it with your name.)

I must have missed something today. I cannot read every story on Illumination and Illumination-Curated. I try — and fail daily — to read all of the great articles.

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Iꜰ ʏᴏᴜ ꜰɪɴᴅ ᴀɴʏ ᴍɪsᴛᴀᴋᴇ, ᴛʏᴘᴏ, ᴏʀ ᴏᴛʜᴇʀ ᴇʀʀᴏʀ, ᴘʟᴇᴀsᴇ ʟᴇᴀᴠᴇ ᴀ ᴘʀɪᴠᴀᴛᴇ ɴᴏᴛᴇ ꜰᴏʀ ᴄᴏʀʀᴇᴄᴛɪᴏɴ. Tʜᴀɴᴋs.

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