8 Reasons Why I Love the New Layout
Medium! You ROCK

1. I can write a listicle
And if I were to write a listicle of things I love writing, listicles would be on the top of the mountain.
2. People don’t like the new layout
I’m never happier than when other people are unhappy. Feel free to be unhappy about it in the comments.
3. There are many bugs
I love bugs.
Each time my notifications do not load is an opportunity for a power-meditation that puts me right back on track to becoming Bouddha. Thank you, Medium, for all the bugs. I love them. Keep them coming.
Hashtag enlightened.
4. I finally have a chance to get fucked
Even Laco got fucked thanks to the new layout. See for yourself.

I’m pretty jealous but remain optimistic. Maybe this listicle will help?
5. The tags are not visible anymore
If you’re regularly writing satire like me, that’s great news, folks. Finally, people won’t know if it’s truth or satire. That’s likely to trigger them into writing some of these angry comments the algorithm loves so much. Trolls! Come to me and make me rich!
HA HA HA
(That’s my evil laugh. It’s better live. Maybe I should start a YouTok channel.)
6. The related articles are much more visible
I see this as a win/win.
There are more chances people will discover my articles, and it’s easier for me to lure in new followers by clapping and running on articles I will never read.
7. Some people will get fired over this change
After listicles and unhappy people, that’s like my #3 reason for being happy. It’s because I’m a leader and real leaders fire people.
8. It reminds me of Wordle
It doesn’t, but I thought it would be a good opportunity to plug my article explaining why I hate Wordle.
Side note, I don’t care about Wordle. I’m just throwing articles at the paywall, hoping to get viral and buy my grandma a new denture.
Tell me in the comments if it works. I don’t read them.
Okay, now we’re off to the tagging section
(What can I say? I love claps. Ask MissClappy if you don’t believe me.)
- A listicle I liked by Paul? => click here
- The best clap and run article you’ll ever read by Srini? => clap here
- The article where Kristine gets fucked? => watch it here
That’s enough. I wouldn’t want you to read too many articles that aren’t mine.
Smillew is a Medium artist who writes about testicles scratching tools, his Medium newsletter, and his Medium referral link. No need to follow him; he’ll show up in your feed.
