5 Signs That You’re Rich

#1 — You don’t read this article

Rich people don’t have time to read introductions. They go straight to the point. In this case, 5 of them.

#1 — You don’t read articles titled “5 Signs That You’re Rich”

You know you’re rich, you don’t have any doubt about it, and you don’t need confirmation. The only reason that could make you read such an article is to laugh at the poor people in the comment section.

Usually, you have other things to do.

Also, you don’t laugh at the poor people in the comment. Only poor people do that. Ironically, you find this last fact funny. Poor people fighting with other poor people about who’s the “richest.”

#2 — You don’t have a side-hustle

You don’t spend time learning a high-income skill from Twitter accounts with one thousand followers. Or one hundred thousand for that matters.

You don’t tweet. At least not publicly. You might use Twitter to follow part of the news.

You don’t need a side hustle, nor do you have the time for it. You have an extremely successful core business that is barely leaving you any time for your family or hobbies. OR. You had an extremely successful core business and don’t need to work anymore. At. All.

Neither will your descendants.

#3 — You don’t measure your savings in cups of coffee

The whole “don’t drink a spicy pumpkin latte from wherever and put the saved amount in your 401k instead” is not a discussion you have with your friends.

You don’t avoid buying the spicy pumpkin latte because of money.

You avoid it because your coffee is of much higher quality. Your coffee machine comes from a luxury factory in Italy, and you try to cut on sugary drinks anyway because you know the impact on your health.

#4 — You buy bitcoins for the laugh

You don’t buy bitcoins to make money, but because it’s funny.

Funny to see clueless poor people invest their savings in some hyper-volatile asset they don’t understand because some billionaire with a dick-shaped profile picture tweeted that bitcoins were the new gold.

#5 — You don’t post pictures of expensive items. You’re much more subtle than that

If you were to buy a Tiffany ring (which you don’t because it’s too layman), you wouldn’t post a picture of the ring on your Instagram. You would post a selfie with Tiffany’s creative director, or CEO, or both of them.

Depending on how much you spent there.

You don’t want to impress poor people who can’t make the difference between a cheap diamond and an expensive diamond, you want to impress rich people who know their rubies from their sapphires.

Recap for memory

I’ve got two recaps for you. Your choice.

Option 1:

You read that far and are willing to read through a recap of 5 signs that you’re rich?

=> You’re definitely not rich. And, unfortunately (?), will never be.

Option 2:

You don’t have to be rich “rich” to be rich. If you’re reading this, there’s a very high chance that you’re rich enough to be happy. It’s a matter of perspective. Be wary of who your heroes and models are. All the best to you.

Smillew is a Medium writer that writes mainly about Money, his Medium newsletter, and his Medium referral link. No need to follow him, he’ll show up in your feed.