4 Swift Universal Laws To Get Any Relationship Back on Its Feet
If you’re trying for one last time, try the *right way*
Relationships are like scrunchies.
Soft, furry, and with elasticity. Though we love wearing them daily, scrunchies lose their ability to return after the stretch. The scrunchies become loose, fragile, and dull.
DIY hacks suggest putting scrunchies in lukewarm water, but the scrunches remain outdated.
Relationships are the same. There’s no way the relationship can return to its newest form after some stretch.
There will be a difference. Always.
With each passing day, your relationship becomes old.
We often make relationship mistakes, such as:
- Rebuilding it
- Trying to adjust
- Behaving as if nothing happened
Acceptance is necessary. People need to accept the demise of any relationship.
There’s no reason why you can’t start on a good note (again). But you need to know if your relationship’s chapter 1 is over. It’s then you can begin chapter 2.
Below are 4 swift universal laws to get any relationship back on its feet. Let’s begin.
1. Whom will you save? (a meditation technique)
Sit in your room somewhere around the afternoon.
Listen to calming meditation music and do this:
Imagine your loved one wandering around a deserted region in the middle of the night. There’s heavy rain and no sound of human beings. Maybe it’s Antarctica, or perhaps it’s a war region; who knows? What would you do?
Mostly, you’ll have [two] answers:
- I am afraid.
- I don’t care
If you’re afraid, you still have feelings for the person. Mutual feelings need a flame to start again.
Meditation never lies. Your brain imagines the worst to align your feelings about your loved ones.
Coming back to reality, realize that you both are in the same deserted region with no hope for life.
So what if you combine and find a way to get out of the deserted island? One person stuck in a noman’s place is dangerous. However, the two bring hope.
Use this exercise with your loved ones.
You can use different mediation imaginations to drive fear for future endeavors.
2. Stay on the same page (likes or dislikes technique)
An O-level tutor teaches my niece.
Recently, she was afraid of her tutor’s negative statements regarding her marks. Though she scored 98% in every subject, the tutor had many expectations. That’s when I told her:
“Your tutor is connected with your friends and family. Defaming him and telling your parents about his absurd expectation won’t work. Your parents need to see the result. So what you can do is find what your tutor loves. Use that.”
A detailed explanation: the tutor had problems with her English grammar skills. I told her to pinpoint its origin and write according to the tutor’s preference.
The “pinpoint origin” paper looks something like this:
Likes: punctuation, new vocabulary, and grammar
Dislikes: repeated words, primary content, no example
She now uses this technique to complete her assignments. Her tutor is now satisfied, which makes her parents happy as well.
You see, sometimes, you need to find out what works for someone. What do they like or dislike?
Try using dislikes and likes techniques to smoothen your relationship. Complete this activity with your partner and find out if you’re both on the same page.
3. Use if(s) and but(s)
Most times, we say without thinking.
What does this phrase even mean?
Saying without thinking means not analyzing if’s, buts, and wills.
A good balance of the present and past is essential. You should know what someone brings to the table.
Here are a few things your partner/friend may be good at:
- Sense of humor
- Friend circle and connections
- Positivity
- Status
- Respect and encouragement
- The nuclear family (welfare for kids)
Exclude the factor that you are entitled to your partner’s future because he had a significant role in your past. Adjust this “help” factor in the above listicle.
So now you see and figure out the points your paters bring to the table. Now, test it with ifs, buts, and wills.
For example:
- What if I lose all my connections and my friend circle in favor of [my husband]
- What if all my kids start hating me?
- What if I lose my respect in front of millions of people with judge trials?
Now ask yourself a final question:
“Am I ready for all the disgrace?”
Use the same technique with your partner. Remember that your benefits have to be a joint command.
You cannot be materialistic — your benefits need to be mentally connected.
All the benefits are a plus point. If you’re losing someone, you’re losing a friend in them.
All else is replaceable.
4. Turn away (breaks and hours technique)
Jason Capital issued a statement:
“When you’re 24 hours with your partner for, there’s no time to miss anyone. I'll take some time off to spend time together.”
It creates value. Spending time alone allows you to crave the person.
Do you know why?
Because a human being is hardly present his whole day. We work like robots.
This means that in our 16 hour-wake schedules, we’re:
- Present for 6 hours
- Absent-minded for more than 10 hours
That’s why we take refreshments to keep ourselves present.
When you spend 24 hours with your partner, you start being absent-minded.
You start ignoring them for good. When this starts to happen, the relationship becomes a liability. Stay 100% awake and fresh when talking to your partner.
Instead of trying to find time to stay with my partner all day, find breaks and hours to spend quality time together. Apply the same technique to your confused relationships by giving them time.
The less you appear, the more they crave you.
Apply this method to your existing and oh-so-ending relationships to reap benefits.
Final thoughts:
A relationship is like a scrunchie stretch.
Stretch it with kindness.
If you don’t handle your relations with care, you might illuminate the loose springs in your mental connectivity.
Instead, fuel your connection with monthly outings, fun, and affirmation. Don’t let the scrunchie stretch get loose and ugly.
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