You’ll Destroy Yourself Emotionally if You Chase Love

Here is what to do instead.

Albert Einstein once said that humanity would only have four more years if bees disappeared from Earth. It shows a profound interdependency between nature and humans.

Our eyes may ignore a flower blooming in the backyard. But the bee does not neglect even a tiny, forgotten wildflower in the forest. They always find a way to get near them.

But how do bees find flowers? Do flowers and crops dance to attract bees from a far distance? Do tiny pollens whisper something in the air to tell bees to pollinate them?

No, definitely not.

The flowers don't manipulate. It just blooms at its highest potential. And when it blossoms, its subtle fragrance and beauty automatically attract the bees to it.

But we humans have forgotten to flower to our capabilities. We limit ourselves to fulfilling others' expectations. And with that meager mindset, we search and chase love in others.

If you find or chase love and don't know how love functions, you will get hurt in many unexpected ways. You have to move away from the mindset that 'my lover will fulfill me.'

There is another way to fall in love that will set you free and allow you to live with that love (irrespective of your lover).

It is never about how much you love the other.

You can love someone with all your heart and soul and still end up drowning in your tears. Many people have loved all their life, yet they never find love for themselves.

How do I know this?

Because I gave more than 100% in every relationship.

After a while, it constantly exhausted me and left me wondering, ‘Why I was being punished for love. What wrong did I do? How can the other be blind to my sacrifices?’

However, now I can see the reason was never the other.

It was because of where my love came from.

My love was not always coming from a pure place. After years of sacrifice, I wanted the same love, attention, and care the way I did. And whenever I received his love, my judgments blocked it.

Loving the other with whom you vibe is easy.

But you feel a lack after a while, especially when you keep clipping your wings to fulfill others. It may be because you feel it is your duty, expectations, responsibility, or obligation — the reasons can be endless.

It took me years to understand that you can't give from an empty plate.

Fill yourself with love first. It is not selfishness. It is the top-most priority, which most people ignore.

You can't love from a loveless heart. You can't give from an empty pocket. You can't look at others hoping for a drop of love from them.

It is not love. It is a subtle begging.

Make love work for you, not against you.

You can prevent yourself from being emotionally destroyed. Change your approach to this —

• It is *not* about how much love you give to the other.
• It is *not* about getting dependent on others to get love.
• It is about how much you fill love within yourself.

You don't have to become Rumi to understand the meaning of profound love.

You have to be you. The solution is 'you.'

When you genuinely love, you love with no bounds in those moments. The ocean of love engulfs you.

But when the same ocean dries up, you must fill it. Not from begging, borrowing, or stealing love.

Reconnect with your heart and replenish yourself with love. It is solely your responsibility.

Stop cutting your supply to yourself. It is the foundation to understand love and grow in it.

Fill yourself with nutritional ingredients like a flower. Only then you can bloom to the highest.

You'll be destroyed emotionally if you don't take this extra step.

The hardest part of understanding love is that it is not what society teaches us. It is not what we see happily ever after type of movies.

Love is not a destination towards someone's heart.

It is an ongoing journey of life.

Remember any challenging life situation of the past. Recall the despair, helplessness, and agony. Notice how you felt at that time.

Cut to now.

Will you feel equal turmoil if a similar situation arises now?

Maybe not that intensely. Why?

Because you learned your lessons from that particular situation.

Right now also, life is pushing you to learn your lesson. Use your current circumstances. Notice what it is trying to teach you.

• Is it a lesson in self-love?
• Do you need to overcome your jealousy, comparison, and expectations?
• Is there a subtle need to control the other?
• Are you too attached to them?
• Is the other foundation of your life? (You can't imagine being without them.)
• Are you physically, psychologically, and monetarily dependent on the other?
• Have you invested too much time, emotions, energy, and money that you can't let go of others?
• Are you afraid of people, society, and your partner's reactions that suffocate you from living the way you want?
• Have you become too weak to follow your heart?
• Do you feel smothered under responsibilities and feel forced to live the way you are?

If you skip the lesson or ignore your situations, life will bring more challenging situations that you won't be able to ignore anymore.

So peek into your situation right now and see what life is trying to tell you right now.

Be authentic in your heart. Answer it with raw genuineness to be free emotionally.

The secret sauce of love is "Your Being."

Outside life situations are poking you to learn your lessons. And your lessons are to go more inside of yourself.

We misunderstand love to be an emotion. It can be.

But when I went beyond the worldly definitions, I found love to be the core of existence.

Love is not outside of you. It is 'You.'

Love is a magical pill that starts from you, expands through you, and returns to you in unimaginable ways.

Go deeper and deeper to find the profound meaning of life and love. Don't remain stuck at the periphery.

Be courageous to dive deep within your heart and live the life you deserve. A life full of love and bliss. A life not dependent on others.

An abundant life where you share your beautiful and immense love with no expectations and judgments.

The more you enter the vast possibility of love, the more you stop chasing love. Then love automatically comes in unexpected ways and doors.

Final Thoughts

Blossom in your highest potential, like a flower.

A flower does not wait for anyone to appreciate its beauty. It just is. It lives and withers in a few days. But that does not affect it. Even for a few days, it lives fully and passionately.

Be like a flower. Live with your heart in all its glory and love. You may feel vulnerable, but when you realize that vulnerability is beautiful and closer to life, you won't be afraid to live in it entirely.

Recognize the blissful love that flows through your every cell. Then you experience the real divine you that is beyond every identity and attachment.

Is life dragging you, and you don't know how to handle it? Download my FREE guided meditation to heal yourself and embrace your magical self.