Why Do Men Cheat? Here Are the Real Reasons Why Men Commit Infidelity
All women want the truth.
We may not always like it, but we want to know what’s going on in our man’s head. And if there’s one thing we’ve learned from years of being in relationships, it’s that men cheat for a lot of different reasons.
Men are far more likely to have an affair than women are. Consider that the broad majority of Ashley Madison’s 37 million “active” users were mostly male, as if you need any proof.
According to a YouGov poll from 2015, 21% of males (versus 19 percent of females) had actually cheated in the past.
But why do men have affairs in the first place? And what can be done about it?
If you’re worried about your man cheating on you, or if you’ve just discovered he has been unfaithful, read on for 22 of the most common reasons why men cheat.
Knowing what these are can help you understand and deal with the situation better. Also, keep in mind that not all men are cheaters. These are simply generalities based on research and surveys.
So, if your man isn’t one of these, don’t worry. He probably won’t.
1. He Wants to Be Free
This is the most common reason why men cheat. Some men feel tied down by their relationship and so they seek solace elsewhere. Other times, a man has simply lost interest in his current relationship and wants out. You can tell if your man is feeling out of place or trapped by asking him how he feels about the relationship.
2. He Wants More Sexual Variety and Excitement
I know that fidelity is a big deal for most women. We don’t like it when our men go around sleeping with other women. We’re jealous and we feel betrayed if we find out they’ve done so behind our backs, but the reason men cheat on women is because they want more sexual variety and excitement.
3. He Feels Undervalued in the Relationship
Men need to know that their efforts are appreciated. If your man feels like he’s taken for granted or unappreciated, he might be tempted by other offers to feel better about himself. It’s a mistake to think of your man as a machine that needs no maintenance. He has feelings and needs, too.
4. He Wants to Improve His Sex Life
Some men will cheat because they want more sex. And some men will cheat because they don’t get the kind of sex they need from their partners at home. Either way, if your man is feeling unsatisfied in the sex department, he might seek somebody else to “help” him with his needs.
5. He Wants More Freedom with His Money
We all know that men don’t think the same way about money as women do. And some men feel like they’re not getting their fair share of the financial deal in their relationship.
If your man feels that he’s contributing more financially than you, he might feel resentment and seek somebody who will appreciate how hard it is to make money these days.
6. He’s Got a Narcissistic Personality Disorder
If your man is cheating on you, it might have something to do with his need to constantly inflate his sense of self-importance and power whenever he gets the chance to. Men who are suffering from this disorder have an insatiable need to be admired by everyone even if it means sacrificing their own relationships.
7. He’s Not Attracted to You Anymore
Physical attraction is important in any relationship. You’ve got to make the effort to look good for your man to keep him interested in you. But other times, men lose interest in their partners because they’re not attracted to them anymore.
If you notice that your man doesn’t want to kiss or cuddle as much as he used to, then there’s a good chance he’s lost interest and seeks somebody else who meets his physical needs.
8. His Friends Are Cheating
If your man sees that his friends and other people around him aren’t getting into trouble for cheating, then there’s a strong chance that he’ll be tempted to do it too. He might not have gotten caught yet because he hasn’t gotten that far or doesn’t want you to find out about his cheating ways.
9. He Feels Like a Loser for Not Cheating
Some men feel like they’re getting left behind if all his friends are cheating and he’s not, so he feels pressured to keep up with the trend. He might think that you don’t love him anymore or that something else is wrong with your relationship.
10. He’s Got a Lot of Personal Problems
Sometimes men cheat because they’re emotionally unstable or depressed. They might lack self-esteem, self-confidence, or just plain old happiness due to personal problems that their partners can’t help them with.
If your man is having a hard time coping with his feelings, he might find somebody who can understand what he’s going through and seek comfort in their arms.
11. He Just Wants to Have Fun
Some men cheat just for the fun of it. They’re pleasure-seekers and like to “sample everything on the menu,” so to speak. Men who prefer variety will have a higher chance of pursuing other people just for fun, but won’t care about the emotional damage they’ll cause in the process.
12. He Wants You to Figure Out Why He Cheated
Some men cheat simply because they want you to figure out why he cheated and how he could do such a thing. Depending on how you react, he might feel understood and forgiven or just want to get back at you for not understanding him or your relationship.
13. He’s Bored
If your man is cheating on you, there’s a huge chance that he’s bored with his life as it is right now — with you and without you. If he’s feeling a bit of wanderlust or just sick and tired of being with you this very minute, he might go out looking for somebody new to spend his time with.
14. He Feels Inadequate
If your man is cheating on you, it’s because he feels inadequate as a man and as your partner because he can’t satisfy you. He might think that there’s something wrong with him and seek validation and pleasure from somebody else.
15. He’s Got a Lot of Sexual Energy to Burn
If your man is cheating on you, it’s most likely due to pent-up sexual energy or frustration. Some men are very sexed despite how much they make love with their partners, so he might seek somebody else to take care of his sexual needs.
16. He Seeks Emotional Connection
Some men cheat because they’re looking for an emotional connection that only other women can provide at this time. If your man is emotionally unavailable or doesn’t think you’re a good partner for him, he might seek out somebody else who he can emotionally bond with.
17. You’ve Grown Apart
If your man is cheating on you, it’s because the two of you have grown apart and nobody’s really putting in an effort to reconnect or rekindle the fire that once burned so brightly within you both.
18. He’s Got Issues with His Mother
If your man is cheating on you, it might have something to do with his relationship with his mother — regardless of whether or not she was a good or bad parent during his childhood years. Men tend to cheat when they’re looking for the type of mothering they didn’t receive as a child.
19. He’s Gunning for the Next Best Thing
If your man is cheating on you, it might have something to do with his desire for the next best thing — whatever that means. Men who constantly seek out new challenges and experiences will carry this habit into their romantic relationships as well, leading them to cheat when they get bored or feel like there’s something better out there for them.
20. He’s a Sex Addict
Some men just can’t control their urge to have sex with as many women as possible, and they’ll do whatever it takes to meet this need. If your man has a sexual addiction problem, he might start off slow, but his behavior will escalate if you don’t put an end to it.
21. He’s a Misogynist
If your man is cheating on you, it might have something to do with his hatred of women. Men who cheat while in a relationship usually look down on the opposite sex and get a sick pleasure from using and abusing them.
22. He’s Got Some Fear of Commitment
If your man is cheating on you, it might have something to do with his fear of commitment — regardless of whether or not the relationship itself might lead to marriage someday.
Men who carry this fear won’t be able to fully commit to a long-term relationship. He might be immature or just not ready for that kind of commitment, so he cheats on you with somebody else.
The Bottom Line
No one wants to think that their partner is capable of cheating on them, but the reality is that infidelity is more common than you might think. Studies found that over 25% of men admitted to having cheated on their partner at least once. So why do men cheat?
While there can be many different reasons, some of the most common ones include feeling neglected or unappreciated by their partner, wanting to feel desired again, or simply seeking out new and exciting experiences.
Men may also cheat as a way to cope with stress or problems in their relationship. Whatever the reason may be, it’s important to remember that cheating is never okay.
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