RELATIONSHIPS
When The Rain Washes Your Tears Away
And offers healing to your broken heart.
Water has been calling me lately. I’ve been taking candlelit baths every night, soaking for up to an hour, sometimes more. And then the rains came — glorious, loud, heavy, nurturing rain.
Water cleanses, refreshes, clears away debris, and unclogs drains, helps plants grow, and ensures survival for living beings. Water clears stuck energies and resets our bodies and spiritual selves.
I’ve been processing some sadness, rife with the complexities of a single woman grieving the absence of another human in her life. Someone to lay beside, cook dinner, wash the dishes, and snuggle up for Netflix, would be divine.
Sure, other complexities would arise. But I’d rather have challenges within a relationship than not have one at all. Oh, the tears I’ve shed from this absence. They were warm, cleansing tears for all the days and years alone without a mate.
The doors of my heart often swing wide open and don’t close even when I’m afraid. I’m always emotionally available. My greatest gift can be my biggest challenge since some humans have let past hurt dictate their present and potential relationships.
They aren’t willing to take a chance on love again. It’s too painful to imagine what could happen if we went wrong. What if we fail to stay connected and we break each other’s hearts? What then? It’s too much, they say. They try to make it seem like they’re doing it for me. But it’s self-protection.
I understand. I have ways to protect myself, too. But closing myself off to love isn’t one of them. When there was a downpour earlier, I was willing to take a chance on getting soaked. I only needed to wear boots and a hoodie. And I’m always willing to take a chance on sharing my love with someone. I only need to be responsible for my feelings.
For the ones who resonate, remember you can choose to stay open, and the world won’t swallow you whole. I know because I’ve been doing it for years. I fall into the feeling as I sink into the bath. I let the water soothe and envelop me in warmth and support.
People will hurt you, and you will hurt others. Your love remains, no matter how much you try to run from it.
I know I’ll be here, anyway. I’ll be a friend, no matter what road we take. For the one who knows, I washed away tears for your absence on this cozy, cold, rainy night. And I’m still alright.
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