When I say chat I mean I write a satirical limerick and then you chuckle good naturedly and hand over lots of money
Tony, It’s Time for A Chat
Where’s the money at?
Coach, it’s been a while since we had a chat, And I worry when we don’t chew the fat, Too much skin on the bone, Boss picks up the phone, And says Toe-knee, we kickin’ shins where you at?
Short arms and deep pockets ain’t your fault, It’s just genetics and poor tailoring I’m sure, But my FoM’s are lookin’ gipped, Their smiles a little chipped, Maybe take another look in the vault?
Mathematics has never been my strong suit, But Pythagoran is staggerin’ to compute, More money in the pot, But less food for our lot, Did you burn it or is it stuck to your boot?
I never would’ve taken you for a misor, You’ve got a great beard and well-proportioned incisors, But you do like to run, Cheap sports are never fun, Have you considered a financial advisor?
Dad always warned me don’t heckle the boss, Specially one with lackeys and bots, Despite the risk to my arse, I still have to ask, How come it seems your gain is my loss?
Money’s not the only reason we’re here, But it helps with the bills and the cheer, Cos when we pour out our guts, To an algo that’s nuts, Seeing frauds being boosted brings tears.
And now I’m hearing that Medium’s gone Disney, Nothing boosted that’s sweary or frisky, Well that’s fucked me again, Should I toss in the pen, Is vanilla how we want to write our history?
I’ll end our chat on a happy note, We can still become friends but I have to know, Can you give me your word, That I’m not being burned, On a pyramid that you’ve helped promote?
This was an entry into Smillew Rahcuef’s inaugural poetry challenge. If you’re reading, Tony Stubblebine (Hi! 😁) please drop a comment as I’d love to hear your thoughts (and it will score me lots of points.)
If you — or any non-CEO’s reading this — would like to enter the contest, find the details here:
And check out this entry by Ben Human while you’re at it. It’s funny and you can dance to it.
I also write on Substack, where I am yet to post a satirical limerick about the CEO. Can’t be long though.