Ball Gags Are Riskier Than They Seem

Follow these safety tips before playing with one

Last year, I got my hands on a big mystery box of sex toys, which turned out to be mostly filled with bondage gear.

I got it for the whimsy and thrill of opening a package full of surprise sex stuff, and I was pleasantly surprised by what it contained.

There were lubes, which I always have plenty of uses for.

It had a smooth paddle that I’ve had the pleasure of being smacked with several times since.

And there were all sorts of restraints that Mr. Austin could use to tie me up in whatever way he felt like.

Some of the things I got were too far out of my comfort zone, though. Nipple clamps were one of those because they just don’t sound fun to me at all. Same with another paddle that looks like it’s designed to leave some pretty serious bruises. Those went straight into a box that I tucked at the back of my closet.

Then there were a few items that are more like gray areas. The thought of trying them didn’t turn me on, but I was curious enough to hold on to them.

The collar and leash went into the “maybe someday” pile because I could see myself playing with it in some very specific ways if I got extremely horny.

I held on to the strap-on dildo, too. I don’t have a use for it now, but I’ll definitely try it out if I ever get the sex doll that I keep window shopping for.

And I kept the ball gag. I don’t find them very appealing. I’m too bratty to be into the idea of muffling my voice. But I knew I might give it a try someday.

I haven’t played with it yet. And recently, I came across a TikTok that made me glad I hadn’t jumped right into using it.

The TikTokker, Jason Drake, cautions that ball gags should be used safely to avoid the wearer from choking on their own saliva.

I’m glad I was hesitant to try the ball gag because until I came across that video, I never even thought about the possible risks of using one — let alone the potentially fatal risks. It just seemed so simple and straightforward.

So, I decided to do some more research. If I’m ever going to let Mr. Austin gag my mouth, or if I’m ever going to meet a submissive cutie who wants me to gag her, I want it to be done in the safest way possible.

These are the safety precautions I’m going to take if I ever finally decide to play with my ball gag, and they’re the ones anyone should have in place before muffling their partners or agreeing to be muffled by them.

Get the Positioning Right

Ball gags are a drooly toy. Whenever I’ve seen a video of a woman wearing one, things get really sloppy because it encourages the production of saliva.

It also makes it harder to swallow.

That means all the excess drool can pool in the throat and cause the person wearing the gag to choke on their own saliva.

To avoid this issue, you have to make sure that the person being gagged is positioned so their head is pointed down, at least slightly. That way, they can let the saliva drip from their mouth instead of letting it accumulate at the back of it.

Don’t Play While Nauseous or Congested

Nausea is another serious issue because vomiting will cause the same kind of choking that pooling saliva can.

If you’re playing with someone who is feeling any kind of nausea whatsoever, leave the gag out of it. And if you’re gagged and start to feel nauseous, tap out immediately.

Congestion is a risk to consider as well. A gag will restrict breathing, which isn’t a problem if the person being gagged can still breathe comfortably through their nose. If they’re stuffy, though, they won’t be able to get the kind of airflow they need. So again, leave the gagging for another day.

Come Up With Alternative Safewords

Safewords are crucial for any kind of BDSM play — and they can be handy for more vanilla sex, too.

They give you a clear and simple way to redirect the action before it gets too intense, put a complete stop to it if you need to, or signal that something’s going wrong.

But because safewords are words, though, they’re not very useful when a gag’s involved.

I personally use a system where I will say “red” if I need things to come to a stop, “orange” if I want to change what we’re doing, “yellow” if I’m enjoying myself but don’t want things to go any further, and “green” if I’m fine with things escalating. With a ball gag in my mouth, though, I wouldn’t be able to use any of those.

So, make sure you have a clear, unmissable alternative in place.

I’ve seen a few suggestions online. If your wrists aren’t bound, you could tap your partner so they know you need them to remove the gag and check in with you. Or you can come up with a hand signal.

Another option is to hold an object you can drop or a bell you can ring if you need to signal your safeword.

I’ve also seen a recommendation for setting up a pattern of nonverbal sounds in place of a safeword. Like, maybe grunting three times in a row or something like that. It could work but I’d personally advise against it because the gag might still make it more difficult to make clear sounds and grunting might be a real challenge if saliva is accumulating in your throat.

Set a Time Limit

If you’re not used to wearing ball gags or you’re playing with someone who’s new to them, you should limit your gag time.

Unsurprisingly, ball gags can be tough on your jaw. Someone who isn’t used to them might endure discomfort or pain if they’re worn for too long.

Being gagged for the first time might also be a bit psychologically or emotionally difficult. You might feel unanticipated distress or anxiety from being muffled or from feeling helpless.

Most places I’ve checked recommend playing for no more than 20 minutes if you’re still fairly new to gags. But you can go as low as 10 minutes or even less if you want to play it safe.

Keep Trauma Shears Handy

Trauma shears look like bandage scissors but they’re a lot stronger. They’re designed to cut clothing off patients in emergency medical situations. They’re also a common safety precaution for people who play with rope bondage, since they can cut through rope a lot faster than it can take to undo a tie.

It’s a good idea to have a pair on hand when you’re using gags too.

If for whatever reason you can’t undo the clasp on the gag, you’ll want to have something that can cut through the strap quickly and safely.

Since a lot of ball gags have a leather or faux leather strap, you’ll need to make sure you have heavy duty shears that can cut through that kind of resistant material.

Never Leave a Gagged Person Alone

I’m not into being left alone during any kind of bondage scenario, but it happens. Mr. Austin might step out of the room to wash a dildo before using it on me or to grab a towel if we forgot one and things are getting really lubey.

It’s not something that you should ever do with a gag in place, though.

Because there’s a potential for choking or difficulty breathing, there should always be someone in the same room as the person who’s gagged — especially since they have no way to yell for help if something goes wrong.

Lesson Learned

Learning about ball gag safety taught me an important lesson, and one that I should’ve known from the start.

Never assume that you know how to play with new bondage gear or that you can do it safely. Always look up how to do it properly.

Even if it looks as simple as innocent as a ball gag, there can be risks you haven’t fully considered.

Do it even if you’ve just opened a surprise box of sex toys and found some new gear to play with. You’ll be just as excited if you wait and learn how to do it right.

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