Odd Story of The Most Kissed Girl In The World

No, it's not Marilyn Monroe or Kim Kardashian, in fact, it is ahem a “corpse.”

Crushing on corpses: What has the world come to

Let me give you a little backstory since I’m sure a lot of you must be understandably confused at this point. So basically a floating corpse was discovered in 19th century France blissfully sweeping across the River Seine cough cough necrophilia alert.

Bittersweet-16 :

The body was dragged out of the river and was taken to the morgue but no marks of any torture were found and no one ever showed up hence why her name, age, and backstory all remain a mystery to this date despite how scientists have estimated her age to be 16 at the time of death.

Due to all these unknowns, she came to be quite literally known as the “Unknown Woman of the Seine” or as the French call her “L’Inconnue de la Seine.”

Coming back to the kissing controversies that surround this poor Parisian princess, let me first assure you that no there is no gory necrophilia involved in this story that was just to fuel my dark humor, now grab your popcorn and let the actual story time begin.

Does an unknown woman set a kissing record: Paradox much?

Coming to the real question as to why she owns the title, or the more important question why are we even setting a record for something as intimate and personal as kissing, let me enlighten you.

Love at first autopsy?

Well for question one what happened was that the pathologist who oversaw her at the Paris morgue was awestruck by her breathtaking beauty so much so that he went on and created a mask casting plaster on her face.

Owing to her breathtaking beauty the mask became almost like a viral sensation of that era with artists and thinkers alike using it as a muse and inspiration for years coupled with regular people hanging it up as a décor item in their homes since the silent stoic smile left everyone speechless.

Coveted cultural icon: The drowned Mona-Lisa

She was stoic, silent, and smiling yet she somehow became the ideal European standard of beauty with notable men paying odes to her, with the legendary philosopher Albert Camus citing her as “the drowned Mona-Lisa”.

One critic said that “ Death in water was a very romantic concept. Death, water, and the woman was a tantalizing combination”.

Surprisingly none of this critical acclaim earned her the famous title and that was something created by a man born decades after her death.

The plastic revolution: spoiler alert this isn’t the Kim K one

Our literal revolution was bought about by a Norwegian toy maker by the name of Asmund Laerdal. His business began producing little wooden toys in the early 1940s after first publishing children’s books and calendars. After the war, Laerdal started experimenting with plastic, a brand-new material that had just started to be produced in mass quantities.

He created one of his most well-known toys from this supple, flexible material: the “Anne” doll, which was hailed as the “toy of the year… with sleeping eyes and natural hair”. Although Anne was sleeping she was not L’Inconnue, at least not yet.

Drowning to success 2nd Edition :

However one day “Tore”, Laerdal’s two-year-old son, was on the verge of drowning when his father found and rescued him, on being approached by anesthesiologists, Laerdal was told that they needed a doll to demonstrate a newly developed resuscitation technique — a procedure known as CPR and Laerdal did not disappoint.

Drawing room discovery: Muse-ical

Since Laerdal was already experienced in using plastic, creating a life-sized dummy out of plastic wasn’t the issue, the only question was what face would be suitable for the dummy? Whilst thinking about this he suddenly recalled an eerie yet perfect-looking face he’d seen hanging in his in-law's drawing room, yes the face was none other than the L’Inconnue.

The 1960s: The era of No homo bros

Aesthetically she was perfect but even practically it made much more sense to give the dummy a face of a woman since in the conservative era of the 1960s most men would frown upon and straight up deny kissing a male doll. Lerdal, therefore, made L’Inconnue-faced adult-sized dolls that had the body of Annie and even had open lips and a collapsible chest so that people could practice properly.

This is how the unknown woman of Seine was reborn as “Resusci Anne (Rescue Anne)” or “CPR Annie” in America.

Annie to the rescue:

Again just like L’Inconnue, CPR Annie was an instant hit in the industry and became a pioneer in the world of CPR, as one healthcare worker mentioned that “It is the face of simulation in healthcare — as championed initially by Laerdal.

Kiss to save a life: Snow White reimagined?

Because the operations involved mouth-to-mouth contact, it is because of these extraordinary figures that have grown considerably over time that Rescue Anne has earned the title of “the most kissed lady in history.”

Final words

Personally speaking, it is oddly comforting knowing that despite the mysterious and bleak circumstances she died under, Anne continued to rescue lives after her passing an estimated two million lives were saved with CPR, according to data provided by the Laerdal business.

Though she was unknown when she died, I can only hope that she was somewhere basking in the glory of it all. Finally, I would love to hear your opinions on this thoroughly intriguing case.

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