avatarJillian Enright

Summary

The article discusses the internal dynamics between ADHD and Autism within the author's brain, highlighting the differences and similarities in how these conditions manifest in their daily experiences.

Abstract

The author of the article, who has both ADHD and Autism, likens the coexistence of these conditions in their brain to an ongoing episode of "The Odd Couple." They describe how ADHD and Autism, despite sharing some symptoms, often lead to different behaviors and challenges. For instance, while ADHD may cause distractibility and hyper-vigilance, Autism might result in sensory overload and a preference for routine and predictability. The author also touches on the social implications of these conditions, such as social anxiety and the difficulties in communication and behavior that arise from them. The article emphasizes the personal nature of these experiences, noting that they will not be the same for everyone. The author provides resources for further reading on both ADHD and Autism, suggesting that learning from Actually Autistic people and those with ADHD is crucial for understanding these neurodivergences.

Opinions

  • The author suggests that ADHD's need for stimulation often leads to fidgeting to maintain attention, whereas Autism's need for regulation leads to stimming, which they describe as a more socially unconcerned behavior.
  • Regarding emotional regulation, the author opines that ADHD's impulsivity and intense emotions can be beneficial in crises but problematic otherwise, while Autism's sensory overload triggers meltdowns that are exacerbated by environmental factors.
  • Social anxiety is depicted as a shared struggle, with ADHD leading to impulsive speech and regret, and Autism causing confusion over social cues and a desire for direct communication.
  • The author expresses that while ADHD craves both organization and spontaneity, Autism prefers routine and predictability, suggesting a fundamental difference in how each condition approaches life's unpredictability.
  • Hyperfocus in ADHD is seen as a fleeting deep interest in new things, while Autism's perseveration is characterized by a long-term, profound commitment to a special interest, which can sometimes be misunderstood by others.
  • The author advocates for learning from Actually Autistic people and those with ADHD, emphasizing that while some may be open to sharing information, it is not the responsibility of neurodivergent individuals to educate everyone.
  • The article concludes with a personal plug, inviting readers to support the author's writing through a membership platform or a one-time tip, and recommends an AI service as a cost-effective alternative to ChatGPT Plus.

🙏🏼 Chosen for further distribution

My ADHD & Autistic Brain Are Not Friends

Being ADHD and Autistic feels like having an ongoing episode of “The Odd Couple” in my brain.

Photo by Frank Busch on Unsplash

Before you go looking for my age in my bio, no, I am not old enough to have seen the original “Odd Couple”. In fact, I’ve never seen any iteration of the movie or T.V. show, I just know the premise. The premise is, essentially, two extremely different people are roommates. Hilarity supposedly ensues.

Well, ADHD and Autism live together in my brain, and they don’t get along very well most of the time because they’re so similar and yet so different.

There are a lot of overlapping symptoms between ADHD and Autism, but they often manifest quite differently.

This is a description of my personal experiences and will not be the same for everyone.

Occasionally hilarity, but mostly frustration, ensues.

How my ADHD Brain and Autistic Brain differ

Eye Contact:

ADHD Brain: “I’m distracted, hyper-aware, noticing everything going on around me. I’m hyper-vigilant, highly observant, reading everyone’s body language and facial expressions.”

Autistic Brain: “I’m noticing sensory stimuli that I find uncomfortable (like these bright lights and loud noises), trying to pretend to make eye contact for the sake of neurotypicals, but really reading lips because I’m hard of hearing.”

Meltdowns

ADHD Brain: “I’m impulsive, experience intense emotions, have difficulty regulating those emotions, act and react without thinking. Autistic brain appreciates that these characteristics are great in a crisis, but thinks they’re not so great the rest of the time.”

Autistic Brain: “I experience sensory overload. Too loud. Too hot. Too bright. Too cold. Too wet. Too dry. Too much change. Unexpected change. Too people-y! I wish ADHD would keep it down.”

Social Anxiety

ADHD Brain: “Omg. Why did I say that? Did I really just say that? Did they take that the way I meant it? Why did I tell them that? Why can’t I just shut up? Why do I talk so much? Did I just interrupt them again?! I think Autistic brain was right for once, we should have stayed home.”

Autistic Brain: “Did they mean that, or were they speaking in NT code? Were they being sarcastic? Was that a joke? Why don’t they just say what they mean?! (Well, at least ADHD and I agree on this one).”

Fidgeting vs. Stimming

ADHD Brain: “I need stimulation. I need to fidget to pay attention, otherwise my thoughts will wander. Wait. Crap. What did they say? I missed that. I think Autistic brain has the right idea…”

Autistic Brain: “Ugh. Feeling frustrated. Can’t find the thing. *Tappy tappy.* Tapping my fingers helps me stay regulated. When I’m feeling excited stimming feels good. ADHD needs to loosen up and not be so self-conscious, who cares what anyone thinks? *Stimmy stimmy.*

Routine

ADHD Brain: “I need organization and routine, yet crave spontaneity and novelty.” (Thinks Autistic brain is a buzz-kill sometimes).

Autistic Brain: “I need routine and predictability. I crave organization.” (Generally dislikes spontaneity and novelty. Thinks maybe ADHD should get a planner).

Hyperfocus vs. Perseveration

ADHD Brain: “Ooooh, this new thing is so cool! I’m going to research and learn every single thing about it. […2 days later]…. That old thing is boring now, onto the next! Autistic brain should keep up, that special interest is so last week.”

Autistic Brain: “I love this thing. I learn something new about it every day. I want to tell people all about this thing, but they don’t seem very interested. They tell me I obsess too much, so I stop telling them about it and keep it to myself, but I will love this thing for many years. I thought ADHD was into it, but they’ve moved on already. Oh well, back to my special interest.”

Created by Author

To learn more about being Autistic

Visit the Autistic Self-Advocacy Network (ASAN) website

Follow, read, and learn from Actually Autistic people. We’re the experts on our experiences and the best source of accurate information.

With that said, it’s not our responsibility to educate the world. Some of us like sharing information. Some of us, like me, are late diagnosed and just learning ourselves.

If you have an Autistic friend, please take care not to overwhelm them with all of your questions — they may appreciate your efforts, but they’re one individual, and we’re not a homogenous group.

There is a lot of information out there, much of it written and created by Actually Autistic people. We appreciate when people are interested in learning in order to better understand us.

To learn more about ADHD

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Autism
Adhd
Psychology
Actually Autistic
Mental Health
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