My #1 Tip to Lose Weight

Don’t think about it. Plus, few more mindset shifts.

Do you know that struggle to limit carbs only to find yourself indulging in insane amounts of pizza one month later? Are you familiar with coming home from an intense workout and justify yourself for eating that junk food?

As I have been through a fair share of diets, long hours spent at the gym, various at-home workouts, all of them aimed at losing pounds, I feel confident in sharing what has finally worked out for me.

I am not saying all the above-mentioned ways will not yield any results, but any restrictions in form of food intake, the physical regimen will not keep you healthy if your mind is fighting against it.

Keeping your weight loss on the pedestal trips you up.

Yes, it does work in the beginning. Yes, it makes you feel powerful to drink that green juice every morning. However, I find that many people, after the first stages of adrenaline and set of new habits, spiral down into frustration, panic attacks, and further restrictions later on, if not coming back to old ways of comfort food.

The best advice I can give to anyone struggling with losing and gaining weight on and on is to stop thinking about it.

Go live your unlimited life, indulge in new interests, alight that passion within you to celebrate every day. It does not mean to abandon any healthy choices in your lifestyle. Quite the contrary, implement new habits but gradually, and treat them not as a phase you are going through, but permanent changes in your life choices. Not because a fitness guru advises you to, but because you feel a natural pull towards nutritious meals. Yes, you can develop that kind of attitude willingly.

Here are steps that have worked for me:

#1. What you focus on, intensifies. It is just science.

When you become obsessed about losing weight, how do you feel? Stressed, irritated, miserable? Many people tend to focus on how much they still have to lose, what pleasures they need to sacrifice. That is a journey up the hill.

Instead, focus on all the new healthy, nutritious food you get to eat. New recipes you get to come up with if you are into home cooking. Think about how much energy you are going to have. Imagine how a great and healthy example you are going to offer to your kids or relatives. Who knows, you might even become an expert on healthy eating and make a living out of it.

Focusing on what you don’t like about yourself, such as the size of your jeans, tends to backfire, leading to decreased self-esteem.

— Ursula Ridens, a registered dietitian at Sharp HealthCare Outpatient Nutrition Counseling Program.

People should not focus on weight, people should focus on health. You can move your body, not to lose weight, but because of serotonin release serving as an antidepressant. Because it makes you feel good, not look good.

Instead of focusing on losing weight:

#2. Take time to get to know yourself.

Observe your daily habits and especially your thinking patterns.

I feel like we do not give enough attention to our self-talk throughout the day. We look in the mirror, intending to find faults in our bodies and criticize our looks. We brush our teeth and think of all stressful activities we need to prepare our minds for that day, tasks to tackle, food to prepare, kids to juggle. Furthermore, we compare ourselves to an Instagram feed and wish to have or be something we think we are not. (By the way, my social media detox worked wonders for my psyche).

Creating powerful habits is not about reading a bunch of stuff, but doing smart moves. You can devour countless content on healthy eating, cold showers, exercise tips but unless you mindfully start incorporating new ways into your lifestyle, there is not much another scientific discovery behind your metabolism is going to help.

I am encouraging you to befriend your thoughts. Observe them. What is an intention for not doing things or overindulging in certain types of food?

Thinking about that pasta for dinner, again? What am I missing? Why do I feel the urge to comfort myself with this meal?

Not feeling like working out this morning? What other activity do I feel compelled to do instead? What feeling am I looking for?

#3. Find your why behind your desire.

Once you get to the core of your why behind your lifestyle choices, you can implement accurate changes tailored to your personal needs.

It is not the food you are craving but the feeling behind it. Maybe you don’t feel safe within your environment? Maybe, you lack affection and honesty in a partnership? Perhaps, you feel unappreciated at work, and that bucket of ice cream in the evening serves as a prize for your workload during the day Reasons may be varied. However, the source always dwells within you: relying on external factors to make you happy.

#4. Skinnier does not stand for happier.

Changing how you look can certainly make you feel better about yourself, but you’re still the same person no matter what the outside looks like. External looks do not make you a long-term catch.

Losing weight will not make you permanently happy. It will give you relief for a while. It may provide you that glossy aura and pride in achieving your goal. But it will never suffice for your level of happiness. The way your body looks is external. The way you feel about your lifestyle, the choices you make, the quality of people you hang out with, the content you take in (books, social media, shows), thoughts you have about yourself are far more important in finding that happy place than looks ever will.

Many people approach the journey of weight loss with a desire to change their bodies. They want to look different by thinking that looks will score them more friends, successful career, in short: happiness. They come from a place of lack, not being enough, and that is a counterproductive approach. You can only produce more emptiness in your life when looking for external validation through superficial looks. In order to make any long-lasting changes, you need to focus on grander goals like better health, more time for yourself or increased creativity, to name a few.

People should not focus on weight, people should focus on health. Then you don’t engage in these diets where you restrict your nutrients, and where people get depressed because they regain weight, which is almost an inevitability.

— Professor Gary Wittert, an endocrinologist at the University of Adelaide.

#5. Trust yourself.

Implementing new habits should come from a place of self-love and self-trust. If you set up on a journey not believing you can reach that goal, chances of accomplishing it are very slim. However, if you set forth from a place of unshakable knowing that you only have your best interest at heart, you start to develop a new level of self-esteem, thus committing to better options.

By the way, it is never your fault that you want to indulge in processed food. Food manufacturers get pretty devious — they spend hours creating the perfect nutritional makeup of junk food that will cause you to eat too much of it. Processed food messes up with your hormones and control brain chemicals so that you don’t feel full enough, plus the reward circuits within our brains activate and release the chemical dopamine, making us connect junk food with pleasure.

#6. Take control over the narrative behind your failures.

This advice also falls in the self-trust category.

Perhaps you failed you dieting more than once. Perhaps you promised yourself to move around more, only to end up switching channels while lying on the couch. That is not a big deal. Just because you failed, does not determine the outcome. Whatever narrative you ascribe to the past event, that story will either serve you or drag you down. Past is just a story. It does not have a hold on your present situation unless you let it. Change the story by getting one step closer every day to your new goal. Change the story by forgiving yourself for past blunders and start telling how awesome you are for trying. Remove the word failure from your vocabulary.

#7. Focus on how food makes you feel.

Mindful eating is a great way to start any health journey. You focus on smell, taste, your emotions when it comes to food. Eventually, you realize that some food just does not taste as good as you initially thought, and you are able to implement changes according to your preferences. What is important, you come to this realization on your own, not just because some fitness trends advise you to.

One size does not fit all. Come up with your personal approach by listening to your body. Observe what food makes you tired, sleepy or heavy. Opt for food that makes you feel energized, lighter, boosts your creativity. You don’t have to eat every day the same. You can wake up one day craving a blueberry smoothie. The other day, striving for some avocado toast with eggs. Both are delicious and super healthy.

After all, lay the foundation with self-appreciation.

Trust me, life gets so much easier once you stop counting calories. An unhealthy and obsessive relationship with food is more atrocious and stressful than eating that burger once in a while, with extra fries!

Let’s finally start looking in the mirror and actually appreciate our bodies, no matter the size of the waist. I will never believe that restricting food just to fit into expectations of beauty trends is healthy.

I cannot stress it enough: whatever journey you embark upon, never forget about loving yourself as you are, relishing in the process and appreciating the magnificent body of yours that have given you so many strength and opportunities. Every change can be daunting in the beginning, even scary. But as long as you give yourself time and space to incorporate small modifications, you are always moving forward, not leaping but eventually getting where you are supposed to be. And where you are now is also freaking marvellous.

Thank you for reading!

I write to empower and inspire with self-love. Your biggest strength lies in your authenticity, so embrace the whole package. Wear your unique attitude proudly.