Thursday Musings on ILLUMINATION — What Does Success Mean to You?
Many of us have preconceived notions about success.
That nomenclature of success that is defined by society.
We don’t doubt what was told.
Thus, we inherit it.
In truth, does it work for us?
Those pre-conceived notions could encompass a life-time goal of getting rich, building a business, be a scholar, run a government or own a bungalow at the countryside. Some say that it has to do with the digits on the screen. It should have 2 commas, 3 commas or 6 zeroes, 7 zeroes, 8 zeroes behind the number “1”.
I get that.
I get that because all these messages appear on television and any other form of media daily. We are hijacked visually and by audio form that shapes our understanding of how success look.
When I was a kid, I thought success was the Diploma on the wall. I would be visiting the General Practitioner’s or Dental clinic at my neighbourhood and see how everyone would listen to the man or woman in the white cloak without cynicism and prejudice. My mother would repeatedly drum into my head that they are highly educated, they know how to bring me back to wellness and they have high value certification.
So, the idea of studying hard was wired into me when I was very young via respecting authority.
As I started growing up in school, I realised that the definition of success in my head has evolved from the imagery being a doctor to a scholar. Key Performance Indicators started entering my life every half yearly and the quality of my life hinged upon a string of letters. It is kind of amusing that my goal was to make that string of letters as boring as possible. Straights A’s was the goal, any other letters in caps aren’t that appreciated in the household.
As I mature into my teenage years, it dawned upon me that securing that string of letters ate into my soul. I was bored and disengaged.
As a result of that, my definition of success started to evolve. It went from academic to academic AND entertainment.
My top goal in secondary was to maintain my grades and escape school in a way that I would never be caught and disciplined. It was a lofty goal and definitely an ambitious one. In fact, it was too ambitious. While just skipping school might have been a little low-key to flu under the radar given that teachers tend to give me some slack due to good results, heading out there picking fights and engaging in rowdy behaviour with my friends sent me straight to the police station.
I remember being caned on Speech Day and ironically receiving Book Prizes after that.
When I started working, success started to take on the shape of the dollar sign and the professional title. All I wanted was a higher pay and higher position. I worked 16–17 hours day so I move fast which eventually I did. I was pleased that I made to the next level and the next and the next.
As smooth as things go, something felt terrible wrong.
In my pursuit of higher pay, I realised that more money coming in results in more money going out. Higher earning prowess led to financially stupidity. My bank account stayed stagnant for a couple of years.
In pursuit of higher positions, I offended many people by stepping on their tails. It is one thing to be a goal-directed professional, it is another issue in concern when people started requesting for team transfer. A highly motivated individual without the ability to hold the team together just means there is a limitation to the good work we can do.
7 years in, I was released by the company.
The company had 2 consecutive years of lacklustre financial performance. Finally bowing to shareholder pressure, the decision to trim corporate fats was endorsed. Rumours started spreading around in office and when it reached my ears, I was recalled that I was confident it wouldn’t be me.
Thinking back now, I saw an arrogant jerk.
2 weeks later I was summoned into the meeting room with a Senior Executive who gave me the letter. I remember feeling indignant as I was one of the top performers in the past couple of years.
The bubble of success containing a high pay and esteemed corporate titles burst right in front of me.
While it was a long while before I eventually found another corporate job at that time, I took time to reflect on what I really wanted and how inheriting the definition of success can be a misguided decision. I didn’t even like the majority of my job as a technology analyst. Only the consulting piece of the business interest me. It was a moment of rude awakening.
“No more of this. I need to pursue what really matters.”
Today, even if I have to hustle and put in the long hours to build my business from scratch — I have no regrets.
Maybe I would go back to a full-time job when a majority of my business can be self-sustaining and I would take a salary to earn funds for investment into my business. The North Star is now clear and thus my definition of Success is now clear.
It is to pursue my path in life.
It is to add value to my life, in my own way.
I may have been on a meandered road.
I am now back on track.
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About the Author:
As a Consultant by training, I believe in making the complex simple.
Because simplicity adds value.
Simplicity helps us gain clarity, and clarity helps us to grow.
And if we are not growing, then what’s the point of anything else?
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