FINALLY SOMETHING GOOD TO DO WITH KALE
Introducing! 43 Crafts Using Kale
Everyone’s favorite food to hate is now a popular new craft medium
I was tired of putting kale on Snookum’s plate and then throwing it away uneaten. Even the dog wouldn’t go near it.
As a writer, I knew I could find a solution to the problem of too much kale with a little ingenuity. Introducing my new DIY book:
43 Crafts Using Kale!
Now everyone has ideas at their fingertips to keep kale in their lives without having to ingest it. I’ve always been crafty, but now I have a new muse. I always have some of the leafy greens on hand and the glue gun fired and ready.
My craft ideas have spawned an Etsy store and a bestselling book in the Food as Craft section of the New York Times list. I am grateful for the wonder food that is making my life so full of folate.
In addition to solving the problem of having to throw away perfectly nutritious food, I have also solved the What the fuck do I do with my kid’s plethora of lousy art? problem.
The advantage of kale crafting is that it deteriorates over time and smells. The kids are voluntarily throwing away their projects, sometimes even after a few minutes. It has been a godsend, really.
The craft I am most proud of is the wallpaper art for the bathroom. The project requires soaking the kale in bathwater and gluing it to the glass enclosure with the help of Vaseline. The craft gives the kids much-needed kale privacy, and when it falls off into the tub, they learn to use the plunger effectively. I think they have a future in plumbing!
I get the most requests to YouTube the kale-mache face masks. Probably because it is also great for your pores!
As a sneak peek into what you can expect in my book, I am offering the step-by-step of my Pore-Changing Magic of Kale-ing Up recipe. Enjoy!
- Prepare a shallow bowl with 1 part white glue and four parts warm water.
- Soak the kale for approximately 2 minutes or until pliable in the above mixture.
- Apply wet kale to your child’s face, ensuring you work around the nose and mouth. BONUS: They make the funniest faces during the process, so keep one hand on the camera. This is a family craft — everyone takes part by holding the model down in our house. We’ve had many laughs over kale face.
- It takes hours to dry properly. Once it dries, the model is usually fast asleep. Place the finished product on your kids’ walls within sight of their bed. That way, when your cherub wakes up, they remember the fun they had with kale!
A reporter asked me why I didn’t stop buying kale. Apparently, he has never been to Whole Foods with the other parents in the neighborhood eyeing his cart.
Going home without kale is not an option.
You can find 43 Crafts Using Kale on Amazon.com or in Whole Foods in the kale aisle.
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