Mental Health
If Something Affects You, It Needs To Be Addressed
Ever heard of people “stuck in their old ways?” Sometimes it’s trauma
My Dad
My wife Jessica and I talked a little while back about living with trauma and how it will be a stowaway that leeches itself onto our memories, emotions, relationships, and whole lives. Sometimes people see it as Jack Sparrow’s Black Spot, a death sentence.
My dad has been living with something horrific for 40 years. It’s not my story to tell, but what I can say is he sees his own Black Spot.
Now, my dad is a Christian and has been since I was born, but although he knows that God has forgiven his past, he still has not forgiven himself. My dad grew up in a poverty-stricken home in a small town in PA with a father who always drank and with an angry mother. He remembers a time when he had to eat dog food because there was no food in the house.
He built his first car, so he could get a job. His first job was at a sawmill when he was a teenager. To this day, I remember the street locations he used to drag strip on. But, behind the small-town man lies a dark past. I don’t remember if the story was put in the local paper back then or not.
My dad’s opinions and actions are based on his past, but he will tell you they are not.
I am thankful to have a wife who cared enough for me to get a therapist before we started dating even, to make sure she was good to go. And as I’ve mentioned before, I have a psychologist to help me work through memory issues from the military and anything else that may pop up.
My wife and I have said to people before that it is good and normal to have a therapist to call. One of my friends, who makes around $140,000 a year, has one on speed dial, and basically, anytime she needs to call, she can.
Effects & Dealing with Them
When a negative situation dictates our decisions, it needs to be evaluated. Our satisfaction in life is at stake. It’s time to take it back.
If Something Affects You It Needs To Be Addressed
To this day, my dad is living with ghosts. And there are people I’ve known with similar stories who are over it because they dealt with their pasts.
There are so many ways to deal with something. Almost anything that’s not destructive can be a type of therapy or coping strategy. Some do meditation. Some do traditional therapy. Some do residential treatment. Some do natural medication. Some pick up a hobby or craft. Some do volunteer work.
But, what they all do, is know they need to get past it. They tell themselves that it is not normal, it is a trauma that needs to cease to exist.
The past can make us not do certain things anymore. If our decisions are based on past situations, then we can easily switch truth with trauma and say 2+2=6. That is why it is so important for us to get to the baseline — the normal life baseline.
As parents, our children need us not to have any barriers between them and a situation. For those who are single, it is imperative they don’t try to hide a black spot from their hope-to-be significant other. It’s too easy for us to say, “oh, it’s just me. It’s how I am.” No, you are not your trauma. You deserve to be free and to show the world that you have a scar, experience, and glazed eyes, but you are not held back by any trigger or relatable experience. You can get the day completed with success and eagerness.
Sometimes trauma can make it, so we don’t have life goals anymore due to depression. Don’t let mental health symptoms get the best of you. I have many clients of the past who do, but they say they want their life back. Trauma will keep you prisoner. Put on the full armor and destroy it. You can do this! You were built for freedom and success!
Thank you for reading!! Thank you for your positive comments!! Thank you for sharing!!
Finally published in the Happy Human:
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