I Cried Myself To A Better Me

Crying cleared the debris from my body, mind, soul, and life.

Reading: Honoring Your Tears — A Poem by Garima Sharma

When tears well up, out of the blue, Remember, they come from somewhere true. A place where mourning was left undone, — Garima Sharma

This piece touched my heart, sending me back to my mother’s death.

I couldn’t grieve.

I didn’t cry.

I wasn’t sad. I wasn’t happy either.

I believe it was the absence of love that took that away from me. As a child, I would cry if I saw someone crying. I would cry for every sad human being I saw. I cried if an animal got hurt. I cried for the pain of others that I saw and for the ones I heard about. Tears stayed with me feeding me empathy, kindness, compassion, understanding of life, humanity, living, and love.

Oh yes, I was a wise child.

As I aged, and life obstacles and challenges began to beat me down, I became strong.

Not because of the food I eat.

I couldn’t afford to be weak; it was like an expensive bill I couldn’t pay. I must be strong because the trials and tests life imposed upon me denied me the opportunity to be anything else.

I stopped crying but remained kind and wise.

No matter what life hit me with, the tears stayed away. Even when depression visits and overstays it’s welcome, and sadness seeped into my bones as pain attacked from all sides. My body and mind became so tired of life and living.

I still couldn’t cry.

There are days when I test myself, to double-check if I am human or am alive.

Have I become so hard and cruel, that I forgot how to cry?

Only your body knows, deep within, the one. Let the tears flow, let your body grieve, Feel the loss, let it find its reprieve. — Garima Sharma

I lost both parents in three months. I grieve without tears for my father because the love was there.

Life kept on testing me.

Still, no tears visited.

Even if you can’t grasp the reason why, It’s vital to let your body cry. When the weeping subsides, be kind, be mild, Nourish your body, treat it like a child. — Garima Sharma

I couldn’t understand why tears refused to visit me. Must I go back to my childhood? Must I become humble like a child to learn to cry again?

With the pain my body and mind reeled in for the past fifty years, going back with all of that pain, would kill the child me.

Medical news: https://www.medicalnewstoday.com/articles/319631

Says: Eight benefits of crying: Why it’s good to shed a few tears.

Crying is a natural response humans have to a range of emotions. Possible benefits of crying include self-soothing, relieving pain and stress, enhancing mood, and more. https://www.medicalnewstoday.com/articles/319631

Not being able to cry, does that make me less than human?

I could still feel everyone’s pain, but not powerful enough for tears to flow.

Benefits of crying

People may try to suppress tears if they see them as a sign of weakness, but science suggests that doing so could mean missing out on a range of benefits. https://www.medicalnewstoday.com/articles/319631

Before 2022, even with reasons, tears avoided me. It was the middle of the year when my life began to change. I have spent more than forty years taking care of everyone.

Now it was time to take care of me.

I didn’t know how. I didn’t know how to put myself first. My entire life I did what must be done, whether it benefits me or not. Now I must do what benefits me.

I couldn’t.

For the first time in my life, I became helpless to myself. I didn’t know how to help me.

Then tears found me! It’s like a river opening inside of me, restrengthening my love and life.

I began to cry for no reason and every reason.

After each flow, I become stronger. Something was watering my body, mind, and soul with good vibes and hope.

The more I cried, the better I felt.

With the help of tears, I learned how to take care of myself. I learned to say no to the right people. I found ways to help me.

While battling depression I cried and slowly comforted myself daily. I release regrets with the tears because life showed me how to turn cruelty into kindness. Crying, I can see life clearly along with the intentions of the people in my life.

Crying cleared the debris from my body, mind, soul, and life. The weight too. I have battled with my weight for years. The extra fat went with the pain as tears flowed.

Garima Sharma said: For self-care is a gift, a loving treat.

It’s like more than forty years of pain and grief were washed away from inside of me. I forgave my mother years ago. But thanks to tears, I understood that she had to be her, so I could be a better me. I am taking better care of myself now. I know how to and am no longer afraid to cry.

Crying is my way to take better care of myself! Crying isn’t associated with sadness anymore for me.

Let your tears go, it takes the pain and regrets away.

Thanks to Garima Sharma, I can honor my tears now.

Cry when you want to. Free yourself with your tears. Cry your way to freedom!

Be inspired!

Thank you for reading this piece. I hope you enjoy it and will savor more from some talented writers on this platform, whose links are below.

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