How to Fall in Love With Anal Sex

Every step to making the fantasy come true

I was really into anal sex even though I never actually had any of it.

It was a recurring feature of my sexual fantasies.

There was something about it that just turned me on so much. I couldn’t explain why. I just knew that it was very naughty, just a little taboo, and incredibly appealing.

Anal porn was the most reliable way I could get off. If I was jilling off and having trouble reaching orgasm, all I had to do was search for something like “babysitter anal” and I’d get lots of videos that got me there perfectly.

When I had sex with my husband, I secretly fantasized about his cock pounding my ass instead of my pussy. Just the thought of it helped me come even harder.

The thing is, anal is an especially intimidating sex act.

Even though I was spending so much time fantasizing about it, I couldn’t bring myself to ask my husband to give it to me.

First, there was the embarrassment of wanting it so badly. I knew he wanted it too — and wanted me to want it — but admitting it out loud was a step I didn’t always feel ready to take.

When I did manage to overcome the embarrassment, I still hesitated. It was a hot fantasy, but I wasn’t sure getting my ass fucked would play out the way it did in my mind.

I worried about the discomfort I might feel. We hadn’t done it in years so we were both extremely out of practice. I figured we were bound to get something wrong.

Then, I just had one of those nights where the urge snuck up on me. I was extremely aroused — to the point where I felt my inhibitions wash away. I was enjoying a really good fuck, but I wanted more. I wanted to do something dirty and impulsive.

I stopped Mr. Austin mid-thrust and asked him to fuck my ass instead.

I only managed to say it in a whisper, but it was loud enough for him to hear. Without hesitation, he pulled out of me, lubed his cock, and repositioned himself. He pushed into me slowly, as gently as he could. He paused after every push to give me a few moments to adjust to the sensation.

It took a while for him to get all the way in, but it was worth the wait and patience. Feeling his cock slowly thrusting in my ass felt even better than I remembered it.

The sensation was intense and incredible. The orgasm it gave me was deep and powerful. But most importantly, it satisfied a craving I had held onto for years.

I’m glad I got over my hesitations and made anal part of my life again, but I know a lot of women are in the same position I was in. They’re curious about anal, they fantasize about, and they dream of trying it, but something holds them back. They’re nervous about what it would actually be like, they worry it might be painful, or they’ve had a bad experience with it in the past (I’ve had my share of those, too).

If that’s the position you’re in, there are a few steps you can take to make sure your first attempts are comfortable, pleasurable, and just as hot as they are in your fantasies.

Build Your Arousal

One of the most important steps to enjoying any kind of anal action is to be extremely horny.

Your body needs to be relaxed enough, and that usually only happens when you’re so incredibly aroused that you downright crave it.

You can get there physically by edging yourself and engaging in tons of foreplay, but it also helps to get specifically aroused by the thought of anal sex itself. I’ve found that the best way to achieve that is by watching anal porn, and lots of it.

You shouldn’t just watch the first results that come up when you click on the anal category of whatever pornsite you’re using. Be choosy. Take the time to find videos that really turn you on, and click away from the ones that don’t do it for you.

Make sure you find videos that show women who are really enjoying themselves — or at least seem to be. My biggest clue is always their stomachs. Are they tensing their abs like they’re nervous and uncomfortable? Or are they arching their backs, relaxing their stomachs, and enjoying the way that cock is pounding into them?

I also recommend looking for scenes that give you a clear shot of the action. I find it really arousing to watch a woman get fucked in the ass while her pussy is exposed. That way, you can see exactly where she’s getting fucked, at which angle, and at how much depth.

Find some great videos, keep revisiting your favorite ones, and immerse yourself in the fantasy. It will increase your desire for anal and help you get in the perfect mindset for enjoying it.

Train for the Main Event

One of the reasons anal can be so challenging is that so many women go straight to some pretty advanced stuff.

We go from never having done any ass play to trusting someone else to thrust their cock inside us.

That’s how I did it my first time, too. But I highly recommend doing some anal training first.

Going solo lets you start off with something more modest than a cock. It also lets you go at your own pace, no matter how long it takes.

Most importantly, it gives you complete control over everything. Even when you and your partner have great communication, it can still be hard to get them to go at the right speed or adjust the angle of penetration in the precise way you want.

You can finger your ass, but it’s not going to be as effective (or as fun) as practicing with toys.

Start with a modest buttplug that you can fit in fairly easily. Don’t start with one that’s too big — the biggest step will be getting used to penetrating yourself with anything at all.

To get used to the feeling of actually getting fucked, though, you should also get a dedicated anal dildo. It doesn’t have to be designed for anal play specifically, but it should be one that you never use in your pussy.

I prefer a slim, soft, and slightly floppy dildo for ass play.

You can also get yourself an anal training kit. They’re sets of buttplugs that come in progressively larger sizes so you can start small and work your way up to something more substantial.

No matter what toys you decide to get, though, make sure you buy lots of really good lube. I’ve used standard lubes before, but getting a water-based lube that was designed specifically for anal was a complete game changer. My go-to is Sliquid Sassy. It’s thick, extremely slippery, and long-lasting — all of which makes it so much easier for your ass.

Practice Bearing Down

You need to be relaxed to have great, comfortable, and pleasurable anal sex.

In part, that’s mental and emotional. You need to have enough desire to overcome any nervousness you’re feeling. You have to be relaxed and really wanting it.

But there’s a physical part to it, too.

Specifically, you need to relax your asshole. And you can do that by bearing down.

When something’s coming for your ass, your natural instinct is to clench up. You have to fight that reflex.

Bearing down on your partner’s cock or the toys you’re pushing into yourself is counter intuitive. It feels like you’re pushing them back. Instead, you’re actually relaxing your asshole and opening yourself up for the penetration.

It’s kind of tricky at first. It can take a little bit of practice. But it’s absolutely worth it. Learning to bear down has been the one thing that made anal sex consistently and thoroughly enjoyable for me.

Stimulate Your Clit

Anal play feels really good on its own, but it feels so much better when your clit is getting some love, too.

It’s not just about the amount of pleasure you get or the incredibly strong blended orgasms you’ll have (but it’s that, too). Stimulating your clit makes taking anything in your ass much easier.

In part, it’s about the extra pleasure and arousal you get from it. It’s just one more thing increasing your desire and putting you in the right mindset. But it also takes some of the tension out of your body.

Clit stimulation is easiest to accomplish when you’re playing by yourself but it’s not impossible with a partner. If you get in the right positions, you can stroke your clit, use a toy on yourself, or have your partner rub your pussy while you’re getting fucked.

Everything is better with clit stimulation, and that’s especially true for when your ass is involved. So don’t skip out on it unless you’re specifically in the mood for some simple, straightforward anal.

Bring Your Fantasy to Life

Anal can be tricky to pull off right and it can take a lot of preparation. Sometimes, you get lucky and everything works perfectly on the first try. Often, though, it takes a little work to get there.

But it’s worth it. If you get turned on by the idea of doing it, anal sex can be just as hot, stimulating, and orgasmic as it is in your fantasies.

Start watching those babysitter anal videos, practice playing solo, and you’ll be ready to enjoy the real thing in no time.

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