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Abstract

l><li>Either they show that they care.</li><li>Or you will know that they don't.</li></ul><p id="f523">But isn’t it worth knowing if you really want to have a connection with someone and experience a relationship that has a real depth?</p><p id="5f8d">What I think is that at least I gave my best to have this person meet me at a deeper level than just having a shallow conversation.</p><h2 id="fd79">Vulnerability is the best ice breaker.</h2><p id="fcfb">People are not perfect but their flaws can make you love them especially when they are willing to openly share them with you.</p><p id="df7e">You don’t fall in love with an egoistic person who is not willing to accept their flaws or dark side but you definitely will fall in love with a person who is willing to accept their flaws and be open about their dark side with you. That is vulnerability. It is about trusting the other person with your secrets, with a part of you that you will not ever be open for the world to see.</p><p id="8d8c">But be careful of falling into the victim mode because there’s a thin line between vulnerability and <a href="https://readmedium.com/abyss-of-self-victimization-and-its-panacea-583165ad8c2a">self-victimization</a>.</p><p id="a8f8">Now let us dive deep into the dark side of vulnerability and how some people approach their vulnerability.</p><h2 id="e18b">There is a difference between Being Vulnerable and Acting Victim</h2><p id="692a">If you’re looking for sympathy, you might get it but if the person is someone with a strong sense of self then they won’t move a muscle if you’re playing the victim card to get their attention.</p><p id="340d">I don’t play victim to gain attention from others and since I am capable of accepting my victim mode and grow beyond it, so I am sure others can grow beyond their victim mode too.</p><p id="d8d4">I care and I have been in a place where I acted like a victim, we all have. It is just that most of us are not aware when we play the victim card but it definitely is our responsibility to pull ourselves out of our own misery mode survival game and play our authentic self!</p><p id="b95b">If you don't know what “acting victim” means then read the following,</p><p id="f8f6"><i>Identifying yourself from a worse situation that you had to face and then sharing that sobbing story with others to gain their sympathy. Remember doing this when someone broke your heart? we all have been through the same mess so don't worry.</i></p><p id="6816">I can't tell you how to behave or how to share your vulnerability but as a person who is no longer bound to her victim mode of living, I can tell you how I would share my vulnerability or my sobbing story.</p><p id="020b">For vulnerability, I think honesty does the job. Since I always enjoyed being honest, it is easy for me to speak th

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e truth even if it can cost me any relationship. I would say how I feel and I would expect the other person to be open in their communication with me on how they feel or think about anything that might bother them.</p><p id="3641">For the victim story or sob story, I would share the ABCs of my pain but not have them pity me since I have done really great job in self-pitying for myself.</p><p id="2f95">I would tell them that this is what happened, that is how it felt, I had some terrible ups and downs after that and I have gone down the spiral of self-victimization and self-pity. Now, I am aware and know that it happened and I made some bad decisions but since it turned me into who I am today, I have no complaints and I only want to have a genuine connection from you, not your sympathy but your genuineness.</p><p id="79d5">That was my ice-breaker! I hope it helps you too! <i>Honesty is always the best policy!</i></p><p id="350d"><b><i>Namasté Lots of Love!</i></b></p><div id="dccf" class="link-block"> <a href="https://readmedium.com/10-choices-to-consider-for-a-better-life-54f90dc85c3f"> <div> <div> <h2>10 Choices To Consider For A Better Life.</h2> <div><h3>Create a Better 2021 and the following years.</h3></div> <div><p>medium.com</p></div> </div> <div> <div style="background-image: url(https://miro.readmedium.com/v2/resize:fit:320/0*H_sljIetmC1VoPh_)"></div> </div> </div> </a> </div><div id="7664" class="link-block"> <a href="https://readmedium.com/on-thinking-alone-ef30a00f6896"> <div> <div> <h2>On Thinking Alone</h2> <div><h3>How to Deal With Your Thoughts When You’re Alone With Them.</h3></div> <div><p>medium.com</p></div> </div> <div> <div style="background-image: url(https://miro.readmedium.com/v2/resize:fit:320/0*ZqS9jZ8_FmV4opH5)"></div> </div> </div> </a> </div><div id="18a8" class="link-block"> <a href="https://readmedium.com/5-questions-you-can-ask-yourself-to-deeply-understand-yourself-cd3bd4492b83"> <div> <div> <h2>5 Questions You Can Ask Yourself To Deeply Understand Yourself</h2> <div><h3>Make positive changes in life by understanding yourself better.</h3></div> <div><p>medium.com</p></div> </div> <div> <div style="background-image: url(https://miro.readmedium.com/v2/resize:fit:320/0*K5LaGE1iAQKX7i7D)"></div> </div> </div> </a> </div></article></body>

How To Break The Ice In Conversations & More

Let’s talk about vulnerability & self-awareness

Hello! Hello!

I am assuming most of the readers here are men because, to be honest; we women love to see you sharing your vulnerable side.

Women care, they will always care but seeing a man in a state of vulnerability makes us love you!

I still remember a man I met who was giving a presentation and he shared his story when he was 16 and how he felt like crying when he was not aware of how a bank card works. I felt like giving him a tight hug right there and help heal his childhood wounds even though he was much older then.

Any woman can relate to a story when a man shares their vulnerability.

We all know where I am getting so let’s dive deep!

Share Your Vulnerability aka Be Vulnerable.

It is amazing how easy it is to share our true selves ONLY if you have a strong foundation of Self-Acceptance.

If you accept yourself, it will be easy to share your vulnerable side.

I have met many people in my life but I strongly admire those who were brave enough to accept their vulnerability and share it with others. It actually frees you. It surely freed me!

I was a huge caterpillar person who would never share her vulnerability anywhere. I was good at hiding my vulnerable side, I used to see vulnerability as a weakness but a passing friend of mine reminded me that it is not a weakness.

Later I realized that vulnerability is Strength.

It requires courage to be vulnerable, to be open in acceptance of your vulnerable side and to be open about the pain and hurt you can feel or have felt.

Now let's talk about sharing this soft piece of yourself with someone.

If you want to have a genuine conversation with someone, you might wanna bring your authentic self to the table.

Vulnerability is about being aware of your inner world and having the courage to share it with the other person.

Not everyone will care but if you want to break the ice with someone special, you need to share your inner world with them.

If you take the courage to share your vulnerability with someone, one of the following two things may happen:

Either they show that they care.
Or you will know that they don't.

But isn’t it worth knowing if you really want to have a connection with someone and experience a relationship that has a real depth?

What I think is that at least I gave my best to have this person meet me at a deeper level than just having a shallow conversation.

Vulnerability is the best ice breaker.

People are not perfect but their flaws can make you love them especially when they are willing to openly share them with you.

You don’t fall in love with an egoistic person who is not willing to accept their flaws or dark side but you definitely will fall in love with a person who is willing to accept their flaws and be open about their dark side with you. That is vulnerability. It is about trusting the other person with your secrets, with a part of you that you will not ever be open for the world to see.

But be careful of falling into the victim mode because there’s a thin line between vulnerability and self-victimization.

Now let us dive deep into the dark side of vulnerability and how some people approach their vulnerability.

There is a difference between Being Vulnerable and Acting Victim

If you’re looking for sympathy, you might get it but if the person is someone with a strong sense of self then they won’t move a muscle if you’re playing the victim card to get their attention.

I don’t play victim to gain attention from others and since I am capable of accepting my victim mode and grow beyond it, so I am sure others can grow beyond their victim mode too.

I care and I have been in a place where I acted like a victim, we all have. It is just that most of us are not aware when we play the victim card but it definitely is our responsibility to pull ourselves out of our own misery mode survival game and play our authentic self!

If you don't know what “acting victim” means then read the following,

Identifying yourself from a worse situation that you had to face and then sharing that sobbing story with others to gain their sympathy. Remember doing this when someone broke your heart? we all have been through the same mess so don't worry.

I can't tell you how to behave or how to share your vulnerability but as a person who is no longer bound to her victim mode of living, I can tell you how I would share my vulnerability or my sobbing story.

For vulnerability, I think honesty does the job. Since I always enjoyed being honest, it is easy for me to speak the truth even if it can cost me any relationship. I would say how I feel and I would expect the other person to be open in their communication with me on how they feel or think about anything that might bother them.

For the victim story or sob story, I would share the ABCs of my pain but not have them pity me since I have done really great job in self-pitying for myself.

I would tell them that this is what happened, that is how it felt, I had some terrible ups and downs after that and I have gone down the spiral of self-victimization and self-pity. Now, I am aware and know that it happened and I made some bad decisions but since it turned me into who I am today, I have no complaints and I only want to have a genuine connection from you, not your sympathy but your genuineness.

That was my ice-breaker! I hope it helps you too! Honesty is always the best policy!