Day 6: Depression And Dependence Pain
Learning new ways to grow.
Update, May 8, 2022: It’s come to my unfortunate attention that my X has many narcissistic traits. I encourage anyone that is going through a weird and painful relationship to please research narcissism.
No one told me about this and I was clueless. 4 years later I know about narcissism but am paying the very painful price for having dated one. Below are some links for you to learn from. Very helpful and informative.
Narcissist Questions/Answers. / Narcissist Video Help
Story ends with a car tire……(that’s why the pic, be patient and enjoy)
I am feeling very down today because my girl doesn’t want to talk to me right now and insists only text.
She has a traumatic childhood and I feel she is imagining that I would cause her harm.
I would never cause her harm.
I am sad that the girl that was once my angel is now seeming like a devil.
But, I go on and look forward to the future.
I haven’t really cried but have felt very depressed at one point.
I don’t know if she will talk to me or?
No contact from her all day.
I am trying to be ok and to have feelings of self esteem and just being ok on my own.
Went to get some McDs tonite and hopped the curb on the way to the drive-thru.
Had a flat tire and kept driving so I could park it in the night rain.
Never changed a flat and was not wanting to now.
Thought about calling a friend but didn’t.
Something inside me told me to DO IT!
I had to really think and do some work to pull it off.
But I did change the tire and came home.
With no hamburgers!
I felt so good about myself in feelings I can’t describe.
Took my mind off my girl pain and made me feel more like a man.
In that I can overcome an emergency if I put my mind to it.
It was a great feeling and I hope it lasts and is permanent.
peace,