Calling Us ‘Girls’: When Men Insist On Using Infantilizing Language for Their Convenience
A woman will write an entire research-backed article explaining why the term “girls” is infantilizing, and men will still try to justify their language.
I recently published my article, “Men: Why You Should Call Us Women, Not ‘Females’ or ‘Girls.” Included in this was research, links to news articles, links to definitions of microaggressions, and examples of why their terms “girls” and “females” are systematic microaggressions that demean and degrade women by figuring us as somehow less than our adult male counterparts.
Yet men will (and have) still decide(d) to blithely comment, “but I can use the word ‘girl’ if my intention is good, right?” Or “But what if my woman friend says she is not offended by these words?”
Did you not truly read the article? Is that not the point of how insidious language works to normalize demeaning and degrading connotations for an entire sex of people?
After it was pointed out to one of these reply guys that even if women say that the everyday usage of terms like “girls” and “females” don’t personally bother them, the systematic use of these terms toward women are microaggressions, with very real consequences, he still insisted that maybe one study wasn’t representative of all women. Yes, point taken, one study on female undergraduates is not representative of all women of all ages, but this study was just one example; and it exemplifies that even young women feel slighted, disempowered, and marginalized by the systematic use of the word “girl.”
Interestingly, the above reply guy appears to either have deleted his comments in the face of scrutiny or to have blocked me. Let’s hope people who are called out for their behaviors learn to understand their impact and learn to take accountability rather than doubling down on using offensive language.
When men insist on minimizing the toxicity of misogynistic language for their convenience, they’re exposing their own calculated involvement in insidious misogyny and male privilege. Please, rather than minimizing the toxic, problematic nature of words like “girls” and “females” because these terms are so prevalent and you don’t want to change your language, try being an ally. Try hearing, really hearing, some women’s reasoning on why they don’t like certain terminology.
Try doing your own research, looking at both scholarly research and news articles on the topic. Try opening your eyes as to how power disparities between the sexes are only exemplified in our language.
Try considering why you don’t try changing your language. And then try changing it.
Like my writing? Support me, along with other writers, by purchasing a Medium subscription for only $5/month and get unlimited access.
You can also support me and my writing by buying me a coffee (or two or three ;) !)