About Me — Divina Grey
I’m a picker, I’m a grinner, I’m a lover, and I’m a sinner. I play my music in the sun.
Hello! Buongiorno Bellezza! Guten Tag! Buenos Noches!
I can’t think of a better way to introduce myself than to tell you what I’m wearing, the last ten songs I listened to on Spotify, what I had for dinner tonight, and what I did right before I ate that delectable dinner.
- Bare feet, fitted purple joggers, a soft grey long-sleeve purple shirt that says, “Nurses are the heartbeat,” no bra, and a smile. (My goal is to be that heartbeat someday.)
- Wish You Were Here — Pink Floyd, Pride and Joy — Stevie Ray Vaughn, Purple Haze — Jimi Hendrix, Feel Like Makin’ Love — Bad Company, Look What I Found — Lady Gaga, Castles Made Of Sand — Jimi Hendrix/The Red Hot Chili Peppers, Whole Lotta Love — Led Zeplin, Mississippi Queen — Mountain, Give It Away — The Red Hot Chili Peppers, Simple Man — Lynyrd Skynyrd, 18 And Life — Skid Row, Heart Of Gold — Neil Young, Praying — Kesha, Gimme Shelter — Rolling Stones, My My, Hey Hey — Neil Young, Palace — Sam Smith (You are correct, there are sixteen songs here. I couldn’t pick just ten!)
- Chipotle — burrito bowl w/ brown rice, black beans, double chicken, fajita peppers, pico de gallo, red chili salsa, sour cream, cheese (heck yes, I paid extra and treated myself to some guac.)
- A 10-mile bike ride.
A few more rapid-fire fun facts about me:
- I was born and raised in the Golden State of sunny California.
- I write under a pen name for one reason and one reason only — so my kids have a more challenging time finding stories about how unkind their dad was to me. (I’d prefer for them to form their own opinion about who their father is instead of reading about it on the internet. But as a duty to them, myself, and broken homes everywhere, I’m obligated to tell my story with as much grace and tact as I can possibly manage.)
- My favorite color is purple.
- I’m going to medical school at thirty-eight.
- I’m German, Italian, and Spanish.
- I’m slowly teaching myself Spanish (so I can be that bilingual nurse that comes to the rescue.)
- I’m going through a divorce. And I’m going to be okay.
- My article has nothing to do with the song “Joker” by Steve Miller Band (other than it’s a fun song to play on my guitar), but I’m hoping it intrigued you enough to come on in and stay a while.
- I have an eleven-year-old son and an eight-year-old daughter, who are the lights and loves of my life.
Roles and Goals
Mother — No matter what comes at me in life, I am always a mother first. That’s how I live my life, and I’m damn proud of that woman.
My goal is to show my kids how superhuman we moms are all-the-while wiping away our streaming tears.
Single (Free) Woman — Divorced with two kids living back home at thirty-eight was certainly not part of my plan, but like someone very wise once said,
“To resist is to piss in the wind. Anyone who does will end up smelling.” — Brandon Boyd
This. Is. Happening — whether I like it or not. The pain of it all is undoubtedly wretched. But between you, me, and Quy Ma, I am finding it more comfortable to lean into the liberty of being an unattached free-spirit-of-a-woman (for the first time in my life) than I thought.
My goal is to keep leaning in to find myself with class and eroticism in equal measure.
Daughter — I don’t think living with my parents again is an accident. There is a sense of healing wafting through our house that I can’t explain. They are taking care of us, and I am forever grateful they are our soft place to land. It’s also an honor every day to help them with anything I can as they grow older.
My goal is to stay healthy and take on more responsibilities, so my mom and dad have less. I want to encourage them to grow old with peace and harmony by showing them I am their support too.
Musician — I got an electric guitar for my thirteenth birthday. And the rest, as they say, is history. People ebb and flow throughout my life, but my guitars are my constant, my best of friends.
Music heals, hands down.
My goal here is simple: to heal (myself and others) and never stop strummin’.
Athlete — Alright guys, full disclosure, I hurt my hip last week. But with a little T.L.C, acetaminophen, and lots of gentle stretching, I’ll be going H.A.M again in no time! Never in my life have I been more consistent and dedicated to my physical fitness than I am post-divorce.
Nothing like heartbreak to get a jump start on a new fitness journey!
My goals are to workout every time the pain of missing my kids is unbearable, always be stronger than my son (who’s already taller than me at age eleven), and stay healthy for myself and my family.
Student — The second most gut-wrenching thing I’ve ever had to do after choosing to file for divorce was taking the plunge to enroll in medical school while in the gritty middle of that divorce. It was one of the best decisions I ever made. I’m not impulsive. I think about everything before I make a final decision. Once I’ve decided what’s right for me and my kids, no one and nothing will stop me.
My goal is to make it through my Medical Assistant classes with flying colors, continue my education for my LVN (Licensed Vocational Nurse) license, and show my kids how to use pain as their guide (and a stepping stone) to a damn good life.
*mic drop*
“I’m coming for everything they said I couldn’t have.” — random motivational quote on Pinterest.
*steps off soapbox*
Caregiver/Health Aide/Future LVN — Do you have any unanswered questions in life? Spend a little time with the elderly and listen carefully. They will tell you all you need to know.
I am forever grateful for rolling into my future supervisor’s office two years ago and her taking a chance on a stay-at-home mom with zero work experience for the last ten years.
Clearly, I knew how to care for people, and because of her, I am exactly where I need to be.
My goal is to keep caring for humans like I always have, but with certifications and pay raises the second time around.
Writer — I almost failed high school because I wrote in my journal all day, every day, instead of listening in class. I am damn proud of my journal collection. I’m not comfortable revealing my identity as I mentioned earlier, but here’s a real-live peek into my long-time love of writing history. I’m not kidding when I say I’ve stockpiled a collection of journals over the last twenty-five years and I am beyond thrilled for the once-in-a-lifetime opportunity to share my story with you guys.
My goals are to flood my twentieth book with all my hopes and dreams, sift through my emotions on its paper (and on a screen), and continue to speak to you guys from my heart for many years to come.
I am forever and always a writer at heart.
I don’t have a niche, and if I do, I don’t know what it is yet. But here are some things I enjoy writing about:
Parenting/Motherhood:
Relationships:
Sex:
Divorce:
Fitness:
Writing:
Photography:
Gratitude:
Life Lessons:
Satire:
Final Thoughts
What brought me here: Pain, a-whole-helluva-lot-of-it. Paired with a few heapings of loneliness, a scoop of disconnection, and two tablespoons of my long-time love of writing.
Why I stay: I have an important story to tell. It’s a long one. I need to heal. I want my kids to heal. I am grateful to have found the perfect recipe here on Medium for all that healing. I’m not going anywhere and I hope you aren’t either.
Gratitude: As time passes, I am finding that a grateful heart is a sign of true healing. I am overwhelmed with gratitude for Quy Ma and the entire Medium community. You guys have been my life-line like you wouldn’t believe.
Here is Part 2 if you’re interested:
Thank you for reading. Love on ya!❤
Divina Grey is a ferocious woman and mother rebuilding her life one article at a time. She likes long walks on the beach, singing and playing her guitar, an electrifying workout, and a cup of coffee so decadent she can feel the frothiness in her bones. Over the last twenty-five years, Divina has stockpiled a collection of used journals in an elegant wooden chest and is oozing with gratitude for the chance to share her staggering long-time love of writing with the world.
