BUSINESS & IT

Women in Tech — That’s Cute

You better watch out

Back in school

It was a little over 15 years ago when I was just 18 years old and had graduated. I got my final secondary school examinations and knew what I wanted to do.

We had the opportunity to take the school’s first computer science class, starting in 10th grade. It was voluntary, in addition to my other classes.

I was always good at math and enjoyed technical subjects. Therefore, I attended these classes from 10th grade until I graduated.

I always got full marks and had a lot of fun. My passion for IT grew. I learned Assembler and Visual Basic. I wanted to study computer science!

Before that, my career aspiration had something to do with languages. I like to learn new languages and about new cultures and countries, also as a hobby.

I did some research and found my dream study: International Business Information Technology. A dual study where you study and work in a company, too.

It is a combination of a lot of IT, some business, intercultural communication, and languages. The studies were partly in English, in subjects like higher mathematics or machine learning.

I am German and come from Germany, so it was a bit more difficult. I like challenges. There were also additional Spanish classes.

My choice and the first obstacles

Before I applied for this dual study at the most famous and biggest IT company, I thought a lot about what my future should look like.

There were many hundreds of applicants for 10 places for this study.

My boyfriend at the time thought it was ridiculous to apply for it. Not because of the many applicants. Because I am a woman and wrong in IT.

I should rather become a teacher and then have children and take care of them and the household.

IT is for men. How often have I heard this saying from others later.

Dear men living in the past: Just imagine, times are changing. Women are taking up professions that they enjoy. That they are good at. Independent of men. No matter what some men think of it.

I wanted to become an IT consultant after my studies. I was sure about that. I applied and was invited for an interview. I was so happy!

My voluntary computer science class with full marks and also top grades in math, German, English, and French helped. Also my great interest in IT and the fact that I could spontaneously tell about my hobbies in French.

According to the interviewers, my interest in other countries and cultures and my helpful and open manner led to me being accepted.

I was so proud and fortunate.

What did my now ex-boyfriend say about it? That was luck, coincidence, and probably I flirted with someone there to be chosen.

I was sad because it was my dream, and he was talking about everything bad. He didn’t believe in me and even made fun of me.

I went through my studies and successfully completed them. He kept saying I was lucky and had slept my way up somewhere or cheated on the exams.

He didn’t begrudge me about my studies, nor could he cope with the fact that, in his opinion, I chose a man’s profession.

During my studies, I was a semester abroad. I had many possibilities for countries and topics to write my term paper and study at my company at one of the many international locations.

All of my ideas were bad — but not in my opinion. My boyfriend at the time thought either the country was bad or the topic was bad.

It was my choice after all! He argued he would like to vacation there. That I should choose a topic that would also interest him.

Because he doesn’t want to be bored when I talk about it. Well, he always talked about himself and his topics anyway. In addition, all my ideas and suggestions were bad anyway, all the time in his eyes.

So I finally decided to go with what I found most interesting. I programmed software for an EU-sponsored project during my semester abroad.

It was one of the best times I ever had. My ex never visited me there, by the way, it was too much of a hassle for him. It was only an hour by plane, with the budget airlines at the time for 50 euros inclusive possible.

Even if he has called and written several times a day to know where I am with whom. What I do. When I would be back to my apartment. Called in the evening to see that I was alone.

So many constraints, restrictions, and controls. How glad I am not to have this idiot in my life anymore.

A difficult start

As I wrote in my “About Me” story:

For my living, I solve IT problems … I love my job, although I had a rough start and several difficulties with old guys believing that women should cook, clean, and watch children instead of programming and IT consulting.

…there are still shockingly many guys who think that sexual harassment at work is nothing but a little flirt…No, it’s not.

I started my career 22 years after finishing my Bachelor of Science. I got a job in a small company that did IT consulting for huge German and also international companies.

I was young and female. Enough for some colleagues from my customers to take advantage of it.

I wrote here about sexual harassment. A few sentences I heard over the past almost 15 years in my IT studies and in my job:

I will give you the best sex you will ever have, just give me one chance to prove.

You look so fuckable.

How I grew — with some setbacks

Some years ago, my boss at the time, who was also the project manager at my customer, was no longer there from one day to the next due to illness. I wrote about that here.

He never came back. …

I quickly became the overall project manager and was responsible for all projects at this customer.

I became the main contact person for our customer and was responsible for different employees in several projects without having received a handover of the topics….

I was on the verge of burnout. But I sought help. Worked on me. Took my time.

I have grown. I managed all the professional issues. I got promoted, and still have a great career and learned a lot back then. I am grateful for the experience, even though it was probably too much in too short a time.

My life today

I’m a Senior IT consultant, a single point of contact for many people at my customer, and also for some of those old white men.

I had a hard time but stood my ground, and proved that I’m good at my job. That I am exactly right there. That women have a place in IT. Women in tech are no longer a rarity, and that’s a good thing!

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Get to know me: About Me — Iris B. Stehn