Woman’s Life- Are You Too Qualified For Love?
You probably don‘t know yet
I recently (re)activated myself on dating apps and getting aquatinted of lots of Men.
After talking a few of them, I realized no matter what age men are, they are always try to figure it out what they want.
I give a benefit of doubt to people to explain when they say: “I am just looking around.” “I don’t know yet what I want right now” or “dating sucks, but still I am here”.
In my experience online dating doesn't suck that much as much as people who are on them.
If you are on dating apps, at least have a rough idea about your own self, liking, disliking, how you see yourself in next 2–3 years.
Educated Women have ruined the dating
An article by Vincent Harinam, “ Mate Selection for Modernity,” sought to explain how the process of mate selection and dating has changed.
In the piece, he detailed how dating apps, the rise of hookup culture, and the increasing age of people getting married for the first time were indicators of the imbalances in the “sexual marketplace.”
He concluded the piece by stating that “an increasing cohort of successful women are chasing a shrinking number of high-value, commitment-averse men.”
I have noticed a pattern while dating men and talking to male friends. While many claim to be okay with a woman contributing financially, the reality is that many would prefer she didn’t as they find it emasculating.
I don’t argue with “not all men,” but the majority of men I’ve met mostly think the same, no matter what they project.
And when a man says they are looking for a “feminine” or a “girly-type” woman. I don’t understand what it actually means.
Is there a manual I can read?
The idea everyone loves
The thing is, most men love the idea of having an independent, self-sufficient woman.
They like to date them casually, but when it comes to a relationship or marriage, they most of the time prefer someone who can be submissive and let them run the show.
While women may be attracted to muscular men, this does not mean that we only choose partners with these traits.
I like men who have an emotional and vulnerable side.
After all, research shows that while women favor traits like intelligence and hard work, men favor physical desirability higher.
Nevertheless, I do think the general conclusion is accurate.
I have had conversations with many women (and some men) who echo the same sentiments.
Even myself, I do not think my standards are particularly high, however, the number of men who meet them is dismal.
My opinion, one shared by a few friends, is that the patriarchy has always forced women into a standard that is both heavily fixed and regulated.
Because of this, women, in general, tend to be consistent in how they present themselves and in how they date.
Compare this to men, who are allowed some freedom within the patriarchy — dependent on their race and socioeconomic status — and therefore are not forced into one particular mold, presenting in more extreme and ranges.
In essence, women as a whole have to do more, compared to men who (in most instances) get more choice in what they do.
However, as women have become more successful to keep up with the rest of their cohort, men haven’t experienced the same uniform pressure to change.
This is why the pool of successful women keeps increasing while the pool of men stays pretty consistent.
What to do?
The first and most obvious would be for men to collectively step it up!
In appearance, schooling, professional life, and success.
I think the move away from violent masculinity and stereotypical male traits is an overall good one.
Educated women have not ruined dating, we have simply changed it.
A change that will take some time to stabilize but one that is not harmful in the long run.
I think there is nothing wrong with women raising the bar, nor is how we have done it a secret.
Pushing men to do better by us as a whole is in the collective good of us all.
Are you over-qualified for love?
No, you are not too qualified for love. You never will.
Love is a fundamental human need that everyone deserves, regardless of their qualifications or achievements.
It’s important to remember that love is not something that can be earned through external accomplishments or credentials.
It’s a feeling that arises naturally between two people who connect and care for each other.
Feeling like you are too qualified for love could be a sign of self-doubt or insecurity.
In summary,
Everyone deserves love, regardless of their qualifications or achievements.
It’s important to recognize that your qualifications or achievements do not define your worth as a person or your ability to love and be loved.
It’s okay to have high standards for yourself and what you want in a relationship.
Be open and vulnerable to the possibilities of love and connection with someone who may not fit your preconceived notions of what a partner should be.
It’s important to recognize and work through any feelings of self-doubt or insecurity that may be holding you back from experiencing love and connection with others.
Be Bold
Be Courageous
Be Your Best
Citation: https://aninjusticemag.com/have-educated-women-ruined-dating-i-dont-think-so-a940261ef7ba