Why Caring Is Cool
How to conquer indifference and take on the world
* In a well-known city close to where I live, there’s a seemingly big grey area of collective indifference towards other people and life. And there are many faces that rarely smile, notice or seem to enjoy the environment around them.
There may be all kinds of reasons for this, but, if the over-riding feeling is people look miserable, you probably won’t feel very energized or cheerful yourself.
The Power of Environment
Although the above is a personal perception of one city, our own reality is all we have, so we need to become aware of what brings us down and saps our energy so we can change direction and find our own rewarding ‘climate’ to live in.
I believe that anywhere you frequently mix with indifferent, bored, tired or negative people, is where you’ll eventually end up feeling the same. After all, it’s very difficult for us to be completely immune to the people we meet.
Therefore, we need to be mindful of the company, places, and environments we allow ourselves to be around, often, as all these can affect our mood, energy, outlook on life and our ability to thrive.
Indifference and neglect often do much more damage than outright dislike — J.K. Rowling
Where you live your life
Below are some places where I have personally found inspiration, but I also believe, you can find it anywhere that people are genuinely involved and passionate about what they’re doing. Here are some examples:-
Major sporting events. At running tracks. The guitar section of music shops. Big open-air concerts. At lively theatre shows. Hospital wards. Rehabilitation clinics for people with brain injuries. On deserted beaches. At rooftop cafes. In Meetups (online). Concert halls. On Medium.com. At the gymnasium. Air Shows. Watching The Red Arrows. Driving the Kancamagus Highway, New Hampshire. In Gospel choirs and music. Recording studios. In jazz bands. At racing tracks — driving or watching fast cars. At charity events. Pet rescue shelters, etc.
Who makes you feel excited?
To have the best human experiences, you need to become aware of what kind of people make you feel energized, valuable and loveable, and give your time generously to these special relationships — if you want to keep those good vibrations.
In my experience, having a few fabulous relationships is the most effective way to improve levels of happiness and emotional wellbeing. In addition, if you mostly converse with passionate, positive and uplifting people, there’s no way you’re going to feel ‘beige’, tired or pessimistic for very long.
Unhelpful and Common Behaviours
Automated Humans — on a ‘spin cycle’ that never stops
I believe that this group of people have allowed themselves to become too busy, automated and even selfish with their time and attention. If you’re not part of their inner circle, they don’t see the value in connecting with you. They may even see strangers as a hindrance to their ‘busyness’ — Big Mistake!
In my opinion, there will never be a person you can’t learn something from, after all, everyone knows something you don’t.
Onlookers
Have you ever noticed how people rarely remember what they were doing when they were in a passive state? i.e. watching TV, browsing their phone, etc.
I believe this is partly because ‘watching other people and life go by’ doesn’t feel interesting or important enough to remember and is the result of us behaving like ‘onlookers’ and not creating personally meaningful things to do.
However, we can choose our behavior. If we want to become engaged and interested in life, we need to adopt a consistently caring ‘What can I give? attitude — towards situations and people, in the broadest sense. We need to stick with this question until we find our personally meaningful answers.
Remember that children, marriages and flower gardens reflect the kind of care they get — H. Jackson Brown Jr.
Choose Your Power
We can choose to freely give (to other people) our time, skills, kindness, conversation, compassion, affection, talent, hope, humor, imagination, knowledge, physical help, money, food, clothes, material things, etc.
It’s also best if we drop the haggard phrase, ‘What’s in it for me?’ from our thoughts entirely, as we can never control what we get, but we can always control what we give.
This ‘human upgrade’ makes us feel more valuable, vibrant and powerful, for as long as we choose to care. We become more decisive, meaningful and interesting, no matter what, when we are immersed in, and focused on, ‘the finer details’ of our lives AND feel part of the bigger picture. This also keeps our thoughts in perspective and helps us to attract ‘good karma’.
This doesn’t mean we should never ‘zone out’ and just relax. But for some people, ‘zoning out’ is the larger part of their existence, and this avoids a lot of human creativity, passion, and growth and instead leads to them feeling indifferent to much of life. This is a real shame, for one brief spell on Earth.
Why Caring People Have “The Edge”
Caring evokes intimacy
When we obviously show that we care for others, by our actions and words, this often brings about a good response from the person being cared for. Even if they are quite a difficult person, they won't be able to forget how you tried to make them feel better. Kindness leaves a lasting impression.
Because you care, people will sometimes share some of their deepest and most private thoughts with you, as they trust you will react to them in a gentle and kind way, no matter what they say. Given time, these relationships often become more rewarding, open and meaningful.
Caring people are attractive — and connect with others more easily
When people actively care about others, a lot of their thinking involves how to make other people happy. Because they’re thoughtful and altruistic, they love to think up ways to thrill, entertain and excite their friends and family, more than selfish people could ever imagine. Therefore, caring people are usually valued and well respected by others, and seen as more attractive.
Caring people are the first to pay attention and listen
Because caring people are genuinely inquisitive and care about their contribution and place in the world, it’s easier for them to find opportunities because they’re always ‘looking out’ beyond their own four walls and showing an interest in what’s current and happening outside. So they’re likely to be first in line when it comes to spotting opportunities or hearing about them and finding where they can bring value to life.
A caring attitude sets you up for success
When we want to learn a new skill, or how to improve a technique, a person who really cares will do their utmost to see to it that they learn the best methods and put in the hard work to achieve a high standard of competence. Other people may think of doing things well, but only a person who truly cares enough will go the distance and be successful.
More Reasons - ‘Caring is Cool’
- Caring for yourself means that you look after your mind, body, and soul, in a kind, compassionate way — always. You respect all human needs and fully indulge your passions and interests, thereby keeping love and joy alive in you.
- Caring for other people, without considering the benefit to ourselves, makes life feel worthwhile, rewarding and meaningful and can alleviate depression and loneliness. It also stops us from becoming too self-absorbed.
- Caring people are sensitive and generous with their time, and they understand the fragility of people’s feelings. They also treat other people as equals and believe that no one person is more important than another.
Without a sense of caring, there can be no sense of community — A. D’Angelo
Conclusion
When we truly care for anyone or anything; this is when we do our best work — because our heart and soul is in it. This makes our living authentic, joyful, meaningful, creative and full of hope — and we all need a ton of this.
Without people that care passionately and deeply, life would simply be one ugly mass of indifference, for eternity.
Therefore, I feel it’s time to celebrate and show appreciation for, all the special and wonderful people that care every day — for our lives, interests, hopes and dreams, and everything on planet Earth. These are the real-life Superstars.
©America Zed. Other Self-Help Stories by America Zed.
