Life Lessons

When Life Gives You Lemons, Sometimes You Can’t Hand Them Back

All of us will face predicaments in our lives; it’s how you deal with them that counts

This week has been an introspective one, as my family faces a challenge. This pandemic has changed many of our lives and for us, that would also hold true. I wrote of the struggle to travel across the world due to the closed borders, after I lost my mother, at the start of the pandemic. I live in the UK and my parents were in New Zealand.

I was therefore elated when New Zealand announced recently that it was opening its borders, but only gradually, and that I would be able to travel there in July this year. With plans set in motion to see my father who had coped on his own throughout this pandemic without his loving partner beside him and our family scattered all over the world, he really had been all alone.

This week we had news that his Oesophageal Cancer has returned after being cancer-free for 10 years. I guess the stress and strain have taken their toll. But Dad is still there alone.

“When we least expect it, life sets us a challenge to test our courage and willingness to change; at such a moment, there is no point in pretending that nothing has happened or in saying that we are not yet ready. The challenge will not wait. Life does not look back.” — Paulo Coelho

With the borders still shut I cannot travel without special permission, so trying to deal with the emotions and the paperwork has been a challenge, to say the least. To have to go through this challenge once is hard, but twice, what is the universe trying to tell me?

It makes me reflect on life and what is the purpose of it all?

If I asked my dad, I think he would say he has lived a good life. Maybe it was not the entrepreneurial path or the high life, he worked hard all his life to provide for his family and then simply retired. He was old school in every sense of the word and never could understand my yearnings to constantly travel or why I struggled to settle down, hopping from job to job and never finding that happy place. I think he would say he felt fulfilled in many ways, a loving wife of 60 years and family who care, what more is there that we can possibly want in life?

But I think he would say that he has been robbed of the past two years.

Now he may never meet his great-grandchildren born during the pandemic.

He may never see his grandchild get married next year.

He may never hold and hug his brothers and sisters again.

At the end of life, what really matters?

As usual, the universe has its own way of working and sent these stories into my feed, so I wanted to share them with you, as I contemplate this next phase in my life.

Let me start with Jillian Amatt, “Boy Did I live My Life Backward”. She tells us of how she and her partner, took a leap when they were young and did what they wanted. Along their travels, they met someone, who was waiting all his life to do what they were already doing. Living a life of freedom. Watching them made him realise that maybe he could have done these things much sooner, rather than waiting all his life.

“I silently vowed then, to never live my life with regrets as he had.” Jillian Amatt.

We wait in life until… and then realise that maybe we have waited too long. This piece will make you stop and think, so please take time to read it.

We all have one life and how we choose to live it. This piece “I Followed My Heart and Took the Road Less Taken” by June Kirri, is about courageous choices, going against the grain of everyone’s expectations. Although her choices weren’t all plain sailing, and she had challenges along the way, at least she followed her heart, and in the end, that is what matters.

“21 years later, I have no regrets” June Kirri.

Final Thoughts to Ponder

Life will have many ups and downs, crossroads that we have to deal with. I have had my fair share already, but each experience has made me grow in ways that I have not expected. We cannot live forever, that I know, and as I prepare for this next phase with my dad, I wanted to share these thoughts, so that we can all think about where we are in our lives and not wait until…

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