OF MOMMAS AND MOMAGERS
What Will You Learn From a Kris Jenner Master Class?
The superpower of public relevance
Don’t holler, but I got a mail from Kris Jenner last night.
It read something like this.
Hey, babe
I’ve missed you. How you been? (in my dreams.)
You know I always wanted to be rich and famous. And I was getting there you know. What with a world-famous lawyer husband who was on O. J. Simpson’s team. But, we divorced.
Then, I got another chance with a record-breaking decathlete who was an American treasure.
Somewhere in this union, I noticed the great potential in my babies. Why not show the world all the ruckus we create as a family, and get paid for it? Right?
Well, from the day I pitched our show in 2007, I have made sure my girls and boy try to outdo one another in the battle of the “most chaotic lifestyle,” and it continues to pay off.
I know you’re saying get on with the point. Well, you can’t tell me how to tell my story. I am the Momager!
I have prodded six human beings into being some of the most searched names on Google. Yes, ask about me. My mantra is to stand out — by every means necessary. Good or bad, and stay at the top. We may not have had real jobs at the beginning but look at us now. We are creating companies and are social-media relevant with over 2 billion followers falling over themselves to catch a glimpse of the next chaos we cause.
Uhmm, don’t worry so much about what you do now. We did not, and look where we at.
Want to build an audience for whatever you need to sell?, I will take you into our pool and wash you with the bathwater my babies and their babies have enjoyed.
Ready? Set. Go.
Don’t yell at me!
I know the words I used are somewhat dissimilar to the screenshot. Ever heard of paraphrasing?
Well, what do you hope to learn in a Kris Jenner class?
I think what the Kardashian-Jenner clan excels at the most is the art of paraphrasing chaos and making it edible to the public.
This is just what the world needs. Who wouldn’t want to have this superpower?
I know your insides are hurting but a few more laughs won’t hurt. Come on.
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