What I Want Most This Year: Faith During Hard Times
Some people believe that if you are a Christian, you will have faith at all times. But Christians are still human. We become angry at God. We lose faith sometimes.
I know this well. When I begin facing difficult times, I cling to faith that God will pull me through. But when my situations remain the same for weeks or months, I lose faith that God cares about my struggles.
Last year, I dealt with bullies every day. Given my circumstances, I felt like I didn’t have a choice. When I lost faith that God cared about my well-being, I became very dependent on my boyfriend for love and happiness. After my breakup, I depended on my friends to heal my broken heart. But I soon realized it wasn’t fair of me to solely rely on other humans to fix my problems. They did not have that power, and they could not talk all the time.
One day, when I was alone, I felt hopeless and depressed. It seemed like I would never recover. To drown out the noise in my head, I started listening to songs that gave me comfort in the past. Some of the songs were by secular bands, but they still had positive messages. They reminded me that I am not alone. The songs by Christian artists reminded me that even when I do not feel it, God’s love is unconditional.
After I listened to music, I started praying for faith. It took a while for me to find faith again, but it began to bloom in my heart. God replaced toxicity with positivity. I began to heal. God allowed me to go through tribulations to show me the importance of pursuing a relationship with Him. As I obeyed Him, I found wisdom, strength, patience, and love.
I am currently attending a weekly growth group with other believers. They share their trials, wisdom, blessings, and faith. They remind me to keep praying and seeking help from other believers as well as God. They encourage me to pursue my relationship with God every day.
It was difficult for me to reflect on last year, but I’m glad I did. It was a spiritual experience. I felt called to share the words that God pressed upon my heart. I now desire to remain steadfast in faith and improve my relationship with Christ.
If you are seeking encouragement, here are links to relevant articles I have written.