We Get the Coaching We Deserve
I unsubscribed from a copywriter’s newsletter yesterday. I didn’t like the tone of his emails for a few weeks already, but it’s something he said about coaching that did the trick for me.
The price was utterly ridiculous.
“I’m not cheap (obviously)…it’s $10k a month or 4x calls which will go 90–120 minutes each…”
You might be wondering if I did a mistake in the quote above, but no. He offers coaching services for $10,000 a month, or $1,250/hour. The minimum wage in Michigan is $9.87 per hour, and this guy offers coaching for $20.83 per minute.
RIDICULOUS.
Sorry, I had to repeat myself, but there’s no other word to describe this offer.
There’s no way someone’s coaching is worth this price. You can get professional and efficient coaching for ten times less without any problem.
Why would anyone pay $10k for 8 hours of coaching?
Even if the coach was Freud, it wouldn’t be worth this price. Someone ready to pay $1,250/hour for coaching is clueless about money or is buying the pleasure to brag about how rich they’re at the clubhouse. So rich, they can afford a $1,250/hour coaching session.
That’s why I decided to offer my coaching services
Upon advice of my grandma, I offer two programs. One is dirt cheap, and the other is ridiculously expensive. Have no worries as to the quality; I developed these programs per the highest standards of the International Coaching Association of the Smillewverse.
My coaching approach follows two methodologies, respectively called ZGEC and BBS. I’m an expert in both and use them according to your needs. And depending on the amount you’re willing to pay.
Zoom Ghosting Echo Chamber — or ZGEC Coaching
For as little as $3/session, I will have a call on zoom with you. The session can last up to 40 minutes. This is how it will work:
- You send me $3 or more here.
- I send you a zoom invitation for a session at your convenience.
- You enter the zoom and start talking until you’re done or the time’s up.
I will not be present in the zoom call. You won’t see or hear me. During the call, be honest, feel free, and tell me anything you want. You don’t have to worry about being judged; I won’t be listening.
Scientific studies of Smillew grade quality confirmed the therapeutical effects of the ZGEC coaching methodology. For optimal efficiency, I recommend sitting in front of a mirror during the call.
What are you waiting for?
Book a session today!
Big Bag of Science — or BBS Coaching
This offering is available only in a one-on-one setting. To ensure the highest level of Smillew grade quality, we need to be in the same room. Indeed, it’s well-known that the coaching potential multiplies when two people look at each other’s eyes and breathe the same air.
The cost is $10,000 per hour of coaching.
You have the choice of the place and time of our meeting because I want you to feel comfortable. I will come and sit with you, on your left side or facing you, depending on your preference, and will listen to everything you say during our time together. I might comment, or not, at my sole discretion.
While I understand people want answers, as a certified coach of the International Coaching Association of the Smillewverse, I’m also aware that sometimes it’s better to keep quiet and let the coachee find their own answers.
Even if it takes more time and they end up paying me more.
Also known as the Big Bull Shyte method, the BBS coaching methodology is recognized by the most prominent coaching associations of the Smillewverse; including, but not limited to, the International Coaching Association of the Smillewverse, the Great Coaching Authority of the Smillewverse, and the Universal Coaching Federation of the Smillewverse.
Take your time to think about it; $10,000 is a lot of money.
I don’t want you to make such a commitment if you’re not 100% sure you’re financially solvent.
I understand that trust might be an issue when this kind of money is involved. That’s why you should pay only half of the amount in advance. It’s a risk I’m willing to take to show you how serious I am.
Final words from the coach
As a coach, treating clients fairly and equally is of utmost importance. One should not discriminate.
That’s why I guarantee that no matter the methodology you choose, I will pay the same attention to your challenges.
Free coaching from the Smillewverse:
