avatarJ & J (Jessica & Joshua J. Lyon, BSQP, ACNP)

Summary

The article distinguishes between healthy and unhealthy jealousy in men, emphasizing the importance of a man's protective instincts in a relationship.

Abstract

The content delves into the concept of jealousy within the context of male-female relationships, classifying it into two types: healthy and unhealthy. Healthy jealousy is described as a protective instinct that arises when a man has invested in building a relationship with his partner, prompting him to be alert and ready to defend his partnership against potential threats. Conversely, unhealthy jealousy manifests as possessive or stalking behavior, often resulting from insecurity or immaturity. The author critiques societal changes that have led to a decline in traditional masculinity, suggesting that modern men and women have strayed from a biologically innate dynamic that once supported strong, decisive partnerships. The article advocates for a return to these traditional roles, where a man's readiness to go to war for his relationship is a sign of his commitment, and a woman's satisfaction with her partner prevents her from looking elsewhere.

Opinions

  • The author believes that jealousy is a natural and necessary part of a man's emotional landscape in a relationship, indicating his willingness to protect what he has built.
  • A man who does not show signs of healthy jealousy is seen as either chemically imbalanced, uninterested in his partner, or not truly invested in the relationship.
  • Unhealthy jealousy is characterized by childish and excessive behaviors, such as stalking, and is often a result of choosing the wrong partner.
  • The author suggests that women who are satisfied with their partners will not be interested in other men and that a strong woman will reinforce her commitment to her partner when faced with outside attention.
  • The article implies that contemporary men and women have deviated from a primal and effective model of male-female dynamics, which has led to a perceived crisis in masculinity and relationship stability.
  • The author posits that a true partnership involves a woman who is fully committed and a man who is ready to defend his relationship, likening this to the behavior of lions in the wild.
  • Ex-partners are considered irrelevant and should not hold emotional space in a current relationship, except when there is a shared responsibility such as parenting.
  • The author criticizes the societal devaluation of traditional masculinity and views the current state of male-female relationships as a departure from an ideal, biologically-driven model.

The Two Types of Jealous Men

Sort of important to know both.

PART II of: Is There a Perfectly Developed Man?

Photo by Lukas Medvedevas from Pexels

This is Part II instead of what I had made as the initial Part II, because I wanted to fight a social construct.

Jealousy

If your man does not prepare for war, he is preparing to hand over his hard work.

For the last decade this topic has annoyed me. When we think of a jealous man, we think of the boyfriend, fiancé, or husband — the man that is in relationship with the woman.

There are dozens of movies, but one that hits all the nails is Dr. Quinn, Season 2, Episode 26. This episode is when Dr. Quinn’s ex-fiancé (believed to have died in the war like 7 years ago or something) comes back alive. She makes me hate the writers for two full episodes. It was a gagfest.

The Breakdown

Of course men are jealous creatures. Not only as the writers of Dr. Quinn said in the year 1994, but women I have interviewed myself in basic conversation and in relationship coaching.

“I will always love him” Dr. Quinn said about her ex.

Or, as two women I interviewed:

“I still have feelings for him”, they say about their high school boyfriends — and the women were over 40 years old.

Healthy jealously is when a man has built a home for her, figuratively speaking. Put in the work to build honest trust, friendship, and romance. Of course when an ex or some random [fill in the blank] struts along with only one thing in mind, just like Betta fish’s gills, our hearts will begin to pump and begin to prepare for emotional war.

If your man does not prepare for war, he is preparing to hand over his hard work. If your man does not prepare for war, he has a chemical imbalance or he really doesn’t like you. You pick.

If you are in his romantic life, you are within a territory he will kill for. That’s a biological man. Get over it.

Now, an unhealthy jealousy is when he acts like a baby. This could have started out like healthy jealousy, but you had begun dating the wrong type of man to begin with. He was a quitter, “wounded”, or “dead”. — as defined here. Unhealthy jealousy is also when he goes too far, like stalking you, after you have left him for the new man. Just to leave that new man when a newer man comes along.

In healthy jealousy, this is a spark from one man to the other. If the woman questions this “jealousy”, she probably has not made a decision, she is just sluggishly following her guy. She will probably fall for anything new and shiny — aka “hurt” or “doesn’t know what she wants”. Because she noticed the other man. In healthy jealousy, she should notice firstly her man’s change in attitude, then observe why his spirit became alert, then used her power to reinforce that her and him are an item. Never should she glance back at the other man, unless she is interested in switching. A strong woman makes a decision on a strong man and is FULLY satisfied where she is. A woman who looks around is not satisfied.

If this jealousy gets out of control, both, her and him, are probably children.

There are two types of jealousy. A healthy and an unhealthy. There are 4 types of men and there are probably 6 types of women (I have not researched women as I have the 4-types of men). A healthy jealousy resides in a healthy male-female equality. An unhealthy jealousy resides in all the rest.

As a lion pride sits in a field and two foreign male lions are seen across the field, men of the healthy community raise their heads in alertness and confidence. The huntresses also raise their heads to initially see what it is, but then they rest their heads back down on the grass a moment later. She could give a s***. She also knows to allow the male inside her man develop. In healthy jealousy, the men are just alert and get their heart ready. They do not attack unless the dumb foreigners think they will be coming to say hi.

Women, if the foreigner male comes and says hi and your man does not attack, he’s dead, wounded, or a quitter.

  • if you respond to the man, us victors will walk away and find a real huntress. We will never take you back. In our hearts you died on the trail
  • if you do not respond, but he proceeds forward, we attack. You don’t say anything, unless it’s helping defeat the intruders

If you are with a man, well, you are with a man. You can’t want a man who is not manly. What in God’s name has made you weird? Healthy men, war. The unhealthy men are not fit for war. This isn’t hard.

This includes your exes. Your exes are nothing. If they are in your hearts, get a therapist. They are foreigners or we are the foreigners. If you are an item with us, there is no man of your past.

But, what if we have a kid together?

… your point?

According to the male brain and God, there’s only one father — or there is jealousy. Jealousy is the male brain saying something’s wrong. Unless, Christ and the Church are not a good family example for you. Look at your men in 2021 and tell me you did a good job. We have killed masculinity, but you claim the male brain is not the true science of men… Hahahaha!

Evidently there are an equal number of lesser-huntresses to match our new age cowardice men… Match made in heaven?

Relationships
Love
Women
Jealousy
Neuroscience
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