The Rise of Pickup Artists and Their Problematic Behavior
How 2012 marked the beginning of my eye-opening “Red Pill” moment, setting off a chain of events that progressively worsened as time went on.
Previous:
Dear “Lover Boys,”
As I kicked off my journey of self-discovery, dubbed my “Red Pill” moment, according to my generation and current culture after the release of The Matrix, I had no inkling of what was about to unfold.
Isn’t this how the story always starts?
My scenario often brings to mind a scene from the Italian Job movie, where Lyle watches Handsome Rob charms a woman into giving him what he wants.
In this moment, Lyle is sitting in a car with his camera, growing increasingly frustrated as he tries to eavesdrop on Handsome Rob charming Becky to retrieve her equipment for an impersonation job. Lyle then begins to improvise...
Lyle: “How do you do that? What are you saying?”
Handsome Rob: [in a charming British accent] “Eyy, ‘ow are you?”
Becky: “Ooh goood. I’m good.” [with a flirty, playful smile]
Handsome Rob: “Noice to meetchu, I’m Handsome Rob. And you aare?”
Becky: “Oh, my name is Becky, but it’s written on my shirt.” [giggles and points to her name]
Handsome Rob: “Listen, I’m gonna need your shirt and your truck.”
Becky: “Oh perfect, I’ll just give them both to you. Would you like my virginity as well?” [giggles]
Handsome Rob: “If it’s on the menu.”
Becky: [giggles] “Ahaha, you’re so witty. Why don’t you take advantage of me?”
Handsome Rob: “Yeah, you’re not too bright, are you?”
Becky: [sad sounding] “Noo…”
Handsome Rob: “Perfect.”
For those who haven’t experienced this incredible movie, I present to you this epic scene for your viewing pleasure.
Little did I know the whirlwind of situations I would soon find myself in. Wrestling with my self-worth, largely stemming from enduring significant abuse throughout my life and not being taught proper coping skills on how to handle it all at a young age, I was gradually breaking free from these chains.
In a scenario reminiscent of Becky’s, I found myself naive to the methods being taught to “the player” that treaded into legally questionable territory.
It took roughly two more years for me to contemplate hiring a “coach” who falsely professed to hold authentic credentials, and it was during this period that I would encounter my initial and sole ‘polyamorous’ partner.
I didn’t know it yet, but I was so close to having my life, career, reputation, and finances completely uprooted by a con artist pretending to love me — a means to an end for his selfish desires. I would later discover that this person was, in fact, grooming me as a budding sex trafficker and identified with Manosphere “pickup artist” ideologies.
This revelation unfolded after a friend passed along an instruction manual for my consideration, prompting them to inquire if I knew anything about its contents.
During that period, I was entirely unfamiliar with terms like Manosphere, pickup artistry, and a negative interpretation of the “Red Pill” philosophy. Interestingly, this skewed version closely mirrored a group I was part of, yet I never demonstrated the problematic behaviors associated with this distorted ideology.
The “Women’s Red Pill” I joined was nothing like what it is now and I’ll go into that in later articles.
After years of feeling like a walking doormat with a seemingly “adorable” exterior, I found myself facing the chaos of a quarter-life crisis.
I have come to terms with the fact that I may not fit the conventional standards of “sexy,” and that’s perfectly fine by me.
I choose to embrace being myself, exuding “adorableness” and “cuteness,” even if it means society might perceive me as having a lower “sexual market value,” whatever that even means. Frankly, I find such labels to be quite non-sensical.
While examining the PDF circulating among the women in gaming circles who were my friends, I began reading materials like “The Game” by Neil Strauss, the world of Pickup Artists (PUAs), Mystery and his techniques, with the most notorious concept at the time being the “The October Man Sequence.”
While the concept of a ‘polyamorous’ lifestyle may be deemed “wrong” by some, I’ve reached a point of acceptance regarding this perspective.
As abuse survivors, our emotional capacities can often be larger, requiring more to satisfy them. If society were to universally sanction ethical polyamory, then the opinions of others would become trivial.
Ethical ‘polyamory’ should not be equated with cheating; making unfounded accusations about individuals online could constitute libel.
From my perspective, individuals who cause harm and upheaval in the lives of others due to unrelated issues are the ones truly engaging in malicious behavior. Nevertheless, let’s steer back to the main topic at hand.
The October Man Sequence is a controversial “seduction” technique that has gained popularity within the pickup artist community. However, its true nature as “seduction” becomes questionable when improperly utilized.
This methodology is rooted in the concept of “fractionation”, systematically guiding a woman through a sequence of emotions where she oscillates between feeling positive, negative, then positive again.
So, essentially this process involves repeatedly drawing a person into a positive emotional state and then abruptly shifting to a negative state, which can make the positive feelings more intense when re-introduced.
The intention is to establish and manipulate a strong emotional bond while controlling her emotional state.
This tactic of manipulating emotions is also applied through the push-pull method, which, like fractionation, revolves around inducing emotional highs and lows to foster attraction and maintain interest.
In the push-pull technique, an individual toggles between demonstrating interest (the “pull”) and introducing distance or disinterest (the “push”) to create a sense of mystery and engagement in the other person.
This approach can certainly create tension, evoke strong emotions, and sometimes amplify the other person’s need for validation and approval.
A crucial aspect often disregarded by numerous self-proclaimed “coaches” is that employing this technique can foster an emotionally unstable reliance on the individual using it, leading to an addiction that the brain perceives in a manner similar to substance dependencies such as meth or cocaine.
On the flip side, it could result in portraying her as having Borderline Personality Disorder, which often became their default generalized ‘diagnosis’ for such women, as these “coaches” commonly promote the notion that these techniques “only work on emotionally unstable” women (what?!).
Another aspect of the isolation phase involves advising to “stay away from them” without disclosing to the student that they might be unintentionally instigating emotional instability in those women, myself included, who didn’t exhibit such traits before being exposed to these methods.
It’s important to recognize that before these events unfolded, I had achieved success as a multi-award-winning artist.
However, it’s crucial to understand that the promotion of “courses” serves as a guise to establish what essentially amounts to a miniature sex cult involving manipulated and indoctrinated women, mirroring the deceptive system that led to the incarceration of Keith Raniere.
The fundamental principle of consent remains paramount in all interactions.
This ‘diagnosis’ on her lacks foundation; however, the student becomes vulnerable to confirmation bias when the woman starts displaying erratic behavior as a result of the manipulations done to her psyche.
This process further solidifies his connection to the “coaches” and the principles they advocate.
If the woman fails to discern this dynamic, the technique holds the power to substantially influence her mental well-being, consequently impacting her daily life, career, social interactions, sanity, finances, and potentially resulting in the devastation of all she holds dear.
My own ordeal led to a diagnosis of Complex Post-Traumatic Stress Disorder (C-PTSD) and a fractured psyche linked with Dissociative Identity Disorder.
This was verified through numerous “official” diagnoses and brain scans revealing enduring consequences.
The situation arose as multiple men simultaneously employed these methods on me, despite their awareness of my marital status and lack of romantic interest, unbeknownst to me.
As a result, I found myself forming strong addictions to men I didn’t authentically desire, purely driven by the manipulation of my brain chemistry to believe otherwise. This outcome was precisely what was intended, with my lack of awareness crucial to the success of ‘the plan’.