The Power of Writing and What It Has Done for Me as a Writer

My one-year journey on Medium

I wasn’t much of a reader when I was a teenager, but I was always a writer. I used to keep a journal when I was in tenth grade until my parents discovered it, read through it, and were stunned by the ramblings of a teenage mind.

I learned my lesson. Instead of a daily journal, I did an annual recap of all the essential trials and tribulations of the year with an outlook for the new year. I still have those notes from when I was 16 years old. It’s heartening to see my emotional development that was firmly rooted in some core values and coping strategies.

Along the way, I maintained a blog when I moved to Japan with two little kids to document some of my experiences and learnings. This was when writing a blog was the “in-thing.” Then life happened and I didn’t feel like exposing my soul. I didn’t feel safe. I soon went back to journaling in a notebook through some rough times in my life until I stumbled upon Medium earlier this year.

2022 — The year of Medium

In January 2022, I came upon Medium as a site to read other people’s work. It took reading a few free articles before I quickly signed up, mostly to read the content that's out here. But it was a matter of time before my fingers started to type the words that would form my very first story on Medium.

Tick, tick….Boom! was my first story in The Memoirist to take stock of where I was in life and realize that I needed to start over. With only 223 claps and 7 comments, it was a modest start to my writing journey. Not my best work, but a great baseline to look back and see how far I have come as a writer and a person.

What writing has done for me

Using the narrator’s voice, I learned to express my thoughts and feelings with expressive writing. Along the way, I met so many people who affirmed my thinking or shared writing that resonated with me.

Writing has given me a supportive community that inspires me to be a better version of myself!

I will set myself up for failure if I attempt to list all of my favorite writers, but I will try. Read Michele Maize who inspires with her stories on sobriety, Emily Mark who seems to choreograph her words to dance with ease, Sara Burdick whose adventures led me to my first solo trip, Linda Ng and her nifty lists around travel, Darren Weir and his travel stories from all over the world, Leonora Watkins who helped me understand the behavior of a narcissist, Klara Jane Holloway and her life’s journey being the breadwinner for her family, and Anonymous Teacher whose writing about love, loss, and divorce is a breath of fresh air from a man’s perspective.

I used the three essential elements of writing — facts, thoughts, and feelings — to weave my narrative.

Writing has been empowering!

My healing process started from the inside out. I was able to cultivate awareness by standing outside my stories and peering inside to process so much that had taken place over a long-term marriage that lasted 19 years until the date of separation and another two years to divorce.

Writing has been cathartic!

My most statistically successful and widely-read article was Telltale Signs We Were Headed for Divorce which was published in Modern Women. I was touched by the number of people who could relate to the signs.

The supportive community on Medium allowed me to slowly express more of my deepest thoughts and feelings. I started to label the events that took place in my life and recognize them for what they were. It was not a great feeling, but I continue to push through the discomfort to process and make sense of things.

Writing has been therapeutic!

Joining a Story Nerd’s Club organized by Scot Butwell was the best informal writers’ workshop I’ve engaged in this year. There were so many facets to writing that I was able to learn and incorporate into my writing with the help and camaraderie of a group of supportive writers.

Two pieces of writing that stand out for me are Experiencing a Panic Attack for the First Time and Lessons Learned from a Part-time Dad. I put to practice many of the exercises we worked on in the writing club and I thoroughly enjoyed the process from draft to final publication.

I don’t have a specific theme. I don’t really care for the earnings or the stats. I write about whatever passes through me. Much of my writing reflects my passions (travel and food), my interests (tennis, teaching), and my life (marriage, divorce, dating, and parenting).

The second half of 2022 saw me enter the black hole of online dating. Within a month, I enjoyed writing about the nonstarters in dating.

While I did meet my chocolate-coated strawberry, I navigate a new space of Love 2.0 as a middle-aged woman with primary parenting responsibilities.

Special thanks to the editors

My Medium journey wouldn’t be possible without the tireless hours and work of the editors to keep the publications running. I am ever grateful to the editors who are also part of the community I have built here. JoAnn Ryan, Adrienne Beaumont, Jillian Amatt - Artistic Voyages, Megan Llorente, Yana Bostongirl, Linda Locke, Dawn Smiles, Dr. Preeti Singh to name a few.

What’s in store for 2023?

2022 saw me processing my divorce and finding my adult self. The year saw me go through a tumultuous journey of getting in touch with the hurt and pain caused over a period of time. I could see myself emerging from the dirt and rubble as a happier person. No shame, no regrets.

Forging ahead in a new year, I continue to go after all the things that make me truly happy. I am done rehashing the past. I know the heartbreak and loss of a marriage resonate with many, but I also want to be able to write about how empowering it is to stand on the other side and feel nothing but gratitude; gratitude for having the courage to end something that wasn’t working out and gratitude for the people who were supportive of my decision.

I haven’t lost faith in love and what life has to offer. I do believe I have half my life ahead of me, filled with so many more goals to achieve — both personal and professional. Staying positive has served me well, and I will do more of that in 2023.

The topics that continue to interest me are dating, love, and relationships. Of course, I won’t miss an opportunity to write about food and travel. (Jillian Amatt - Artistic Voyages, thanks for introducing me to your new pub Sharing Food).

I will continue to write, share my thoughts, and learn with and from my Medium community.

Thank you for your readership!

Read Yana Bostongirl’s one tip for writing engaging articles on Medium.

I find myself at peace watching the sun at dawn and dusk. Read Dr. Preeti Singh's piece on sunsets and the picture that was taken at the Golden Temple in Amritsar makes me want to go back to experience that peace.

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