Psychology | Self-improvement
The Mindset Successful People Use To Build Unshakeable Self-belief
And achieve their goals without even thinking about them
I used to be a degenerate.
Seriously.
I used to spend every single day gaming, sleeping, eating junk food, binge-watching the most deplorable of media, and self-loathing more often than I’d like to admit.
I started to believe I was a complete failure. As a result, the person who believed in me the least was… me.
That was until I came across a mental framework that is used by some of the most successful people around to create unrivalled self-belief and achieve your dreams without even thinking about them.
I studied it for the past few years to claw myself out of the degenerate mindset I was in and take control of my life and the belief I had in myself.
It has nothing to do with goals; it’s about changing your identity and stepping into the shoes of he who can.
Before I explain what the hell that means, I have three prerequisite tips to help you utilise the mindset as effectively as possible. Let’s go.
1. ) Limit your social media usage aggressively
If you start a new religion, be sure to make excessive social media usage the first sin.
Social media platforms are like echo chambers: they reinforce all of your beliefs, thoughts and actions to make you more polarised and addicted.
The more shit content you consume, the more likely you are to consume shit content.
It all gets circulated, distracting you from improving your life.
When you’re wading through the sea of negative media that shows you hate, and violence, people who are better than you, earn more than you, do more than you, achieve more than you…
You’re going to feel like shit about yourself over and over again.
Attention is your most valuable resource. Don’t let it be stolen so easily by stuff that makes you feel worse.
Self-belief explodes when the only comparison is yourself.
2. ) You are the sum of your behaviours
We’re not much more than meat suits that repeat things.
When studying someone for long enough (in a non-creepy way), you start to form an entire understanding of them by just observing:
- Their actions, and;
- Their repeated actions.
The behaviours you accumulate define your life.
We are what we repeatedly do… therefore excellence is not an act, but a habit.
— Aristotle
If you want to achieve anything in life — excellence, Lambos, or anything worthwhile — you must align your behaviours with who you want to be.
Otherwise, you’re stuck with a feeling of mental dissonance that is only fixed by enforcing positive behaviours.
You fix your life by fixing your behaviours.
And to fix your behaviours, you need to fix your beliefs and identity.
3.) The most important belief you need to succeed
The most important belief in the world is believing that you can change your beliefs.
It is a meta-belief.
Behaviours define what you do, but beliefs define how you behave. Thus, we become our beliefs and they shape our reality.
The countless studies on placebos prove the power of belief, such as the students who were told they were being exposed to poison Ivy, when it was actually a harmless maple leaf, yet reacted as if they were being poisoned.
But the belief is superior to every other belief is the belief you can change your beliefs. Without this belief, you relinquish all control of your environment and genetics.
You become a prisoner of your circumstances.
Believing you can change empowers you. It grants your subconscious the ability to generate new ideas and thoughts to affirm the beliefs you want until you eventually take action to solidify and change your beliefs.
By changing your beliefs, you can change your behaviour. By changing your behaviour, you can change your identity. By changing your identity, you can become whoever you want.
And if you can become whoever you want, you can achieve whatever you want.
The mindset that builds self-belief
You currently have a 0% chance of achieving your goals.
If the current sum of your beliefs, behaviours, identity and actions could achieve your goals, then you would have attained them already.
But you haven’t.
This mindset shifts the focus from achieving goals to achieving the identity and character that is capable of achieving your goals.
You must step into the shoes of he who can.
Trying to achieve outcomes is usually pointless; we do not rise to the level of our goals, we fall to the level of our standards and identity.
This is why you find it so difficult to achieve goals and maintain habits.
Become the person capable of achieving your goals
To accomplish your goals you have to become the person who is capable of achieving them.
The mantra of this mindset is: become he who can.
Don’t think about your goals. Think about what character traits you’d need to become the man who achieves your goals.
You achieve identities and self-image, not goals. But when you achieve the self-image and identity that aligns with the goal you will inevitably achieve it.
Product = identity and self-image Byproduct = goals and outcomes
Think about what the person you want to become would need to go through and feel to assert his self-image and reach his dreams.
Journal about it.
Meditate on it.
Talk about it.
Become clear about what sorts of actions they’d need to take. Then ruthlessly orient your life to match the person you’re becoming.
Stack small wins to solidify your new identity
When you focus on who you are becoming, you will start to align your actions and beliefs with that person.
But this identity takes time to solidify.
A powerful way to easily build conviction for this new identity is to stack small wins over time that prove you’re stepping into this new identity.
At first, it will feel difficult; you’re committing to a huge character change (which the brain isn’t a fan of) and likely experiencing fear of being incapable.
All this self-doubt is outworked when you stack small wins — small pieces of evidence you gather over time that prove you’re becoming who you say you are.
Ride the train of positive feedback loops.
And remember, every time you hit a wall, think: would the person I’m becoming experience shortcomings and challenges? Would he have had setbacks?
Proving that you can change your character to fit any outcome you desire is the most rewarding and empowering thing you can do.
It proves you can become whoever you want!
Thus, you can get whatever you want. All it takes is forming the identity capable of achieving it.
When you prove your malleability, it leaves no room for self-doubt — you can now adapt to anything that life throws at you.
Consequently, your self-belief becomes unmatched.
Concluding guide
Here’s a summarising step-by-step guide and tips to help you apply this mindset and build unrivalled self-belief
- Limit your social media usage and remove all distractions. This will help you focus more of your time and energy on who you’re becoming.
- Work aggressively to convince yourself that you’re capable of changing your beliefs (if you don’t already believe so).
- Create a dream identity document — it should detail who the person is that you’re becoming with all the behaviours and actions they will take. You need to know who you’re becoming. Otherwise, you’ll create confusion.
- Direct your energy towards becoming the person capable of achieving goals. Stick your dream identity document on your wall, look at it often and remind yourself of the mindset.
- Create a document of all the small wins you accumulate. You can look back at these to create confidence that you’re solidifying your new identity.
That’s it. It takes a while, but it’s damn worth it. Plus, Y=you’ll get better the more you practice.
You can also complement this with visualisations and affirmations. If done right, that can really spice things up.
Thanks for reading.
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