The Biggest Mistake Runners and Chasers Make on Their Twin Flame Journey
What the runner and chaser have to face simultaneously in the twin flame journey
Some days I overthink more than I should. One of those days, I realized that I kept saying “I won’t let you win” to everyone I’ve ever loved. When I asked myself what this means, the answers I received helped me discover my deepest patterns.
Saying “not to lose” to someone I fell in love with meant, in the first place, telling that person, “I always have control over my feelings for you, you will not influence me, I just love you of my own free will.” I will not allow my love for you to upset me, make me make decisions, or surrender to you again.
This meant I would not go where the flow of love took me. Even when I thought I loved someone, I was always squeezing my heart in my hands and putting a resistance between controlling love and feeling it. I didn’t know if I was aware I was doing this. I was just afraid of the great feeling of loving someone like a wave that exceeded my height. I was running away from this love because it would swallow me. But in the end, the pain of not being able to experience love was burning me.
What I always had to face when I was a runner or a chaser on the twin flame journey was that I suppressed my love. Love was not a wave. Love was staying stable, looking at a big, peaceful view. But I always turned feeling love into fear and pain by suppressing it somewhere inside me.
This is one thing I have observed on both sides of the twin flame journey. There is a strange guilt inside us because we try to give our love to the other person before giving it to ourselves. I now understand why we feel so shameful and stingy in expressing our feelings openly. Giving this love, passion, and deep love to someone else, which we clearly cannot even use ourselves, transparently reveals us.
Since we do not have good feelings about ourselves, we cannot accept the feeling that we are always expecting something from the outside. This is a very instinctive and subconsciously programmed behavior pattern.
The source of love that has been packaged inside me for years wants to come out of me these days. I listen to my higher self-talk about the source of love within me.
“Let your love come out of you, flow to the ground, and return to you as fertilizer, not as poison, but as water. Let the love within you nourish you. Love does not have to be reciprocated. Being able to feel the love within and accept it even if it is unrequited is the first condition of being human. Feeling love is a need like breathing, and people who can love allow themselves to be vulnerable and allow love to make them feel everything and purify them from ego. ‘’
The love within me means approaching everything with great receptivity. Learning to be receptive to love enables us to attract most things in life that have the same vibration as love, without the ego barrier, and to exist in our energy field. I understand why my feminine energy is so dysfunctional. Because I am very close to the receptive nature of love. I even put my love in a box and hide it carefully, and then I complain about not being able to feel the love.
If we do not allow ourselves to feel love, we only collect ego-limited, low-vibration energies into our energy field. (Sadness, pride, grudge, revenge, mourning, anger.) But if we accept love in all its forms and intend to rise from the ego and exceed our limits with this vibration, then we will attract the values we want, such as abundance, happiness, joy, and wealth, which are equivalent to love.
That’s why it’s important to be receptive to love. Love allows us to attract to ourselves all emotions and energies of equal frequency. The frequency value of love is around 500. The emotions with the highest frequency after love are joy, gratitude, acceptance, and enlightenment. When we begin to enter the energy of love, we let go of resistance, anger, and emotions such as pain, because love is very light, and fear and pain are very heavy emotions.
The prerequisite for being loved is to accept everything that love brings. To love unconditionally is to allow every emotion and be fragile. It means owning all emotions and being able to love ourselves with all our emotions. Delaying love to avoid being hurt or disappointed keeps us in the energy of disappointment. Allowing love means opening the doors of our hearts to beautiful experiences that include love in all its forms.
Love means saying yes to all kinds of emotions and opening our hearts to unlimited potential and beauty. Being vulnerable expands our boundaries. It frees us and opens the wall of pride created by the ego. A person who can love without limits has internalized the existence of love and uses love to stay in peace and feel only the essence of love. Therefore, the love we feel for someone is the freedom and joy of life that we feel in our hearts without being affected by the person’s physical existence.
Our heart wants to feel and increase the love by using that person. Why do we keep our hearts away from the act of loving, thinking we will protect ourselves? Our heart is the manager of our entire body and is wise. No one knows what we need.
I see the old Bensu. Even though it was right at one point to feel the presence of love within her without expecting anything from anyone, she did it wrong. She equated love with other painful emotions and allowed love to become identified with an emotion that frightened and hurt her.
Love is a big field. And allowing love is making room to handle every emotion and allowing emotions to come and go. It’s not about holding on to any feelings.
Love alone is never toxic. We are the ones who grow love positively/negatively with the behaviors in our relationships and the emotions within us. Love is a concept that develops with whatever emotion we put into our energy field.
Love is letting go of the emotions we don’t need after every emotion comes and satisfies us, develops us, and teaches us some lessons.
In all our relationships, we fail to accept responsibility for the emotions we experience because of someone else’s actions. Rather than saying, “You made me feel this way,” we should learn to say, “I felt this way because of your behavior, and now I did and identify my dominant feeling in this situation.”
When I accept a feeling, it gives me freedom. I feel like I took responsibility for how I felt. I don’t blame the pain of something I was hurt on someone else. Instead of blaming someone, I see that it is my choice to see that I allow this feeling inside me and to deepen it. I felt it and didn’t let it go. I made that negative feeling a part of me. However, the worthlessness I felt for a moment was only a result of the event, not my character.
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Hi, I’m Bensu. I write about the mind, hard feelings, and self-love. If you enjoyed my articles about surpassing yourself and achieving your dreams. Thank you for taking the time to read my article.
