The Best Advice That Really Matters: Just Do It

Fear is never gone as you continue growing

Have you ever caught yourself thinking, or you realize that something is bothering you? The next day the same while you are busy with the things on hand, you never realize and make a pause to deep think and ask, what is going on?

It is challenging to confront your fear; you don’t even want to talk about it. Moreover, as a man in this society, we are supposed to look strong and fearless. We supposed to have everything under control, and we can manage all situations.

Sometimes even we know we have that fear, and we don’t want to face it. Our ego started to work, protecting us from not be hurt. Indeed, it’s worse when you know that there is a fear, and you don’t face it.

“The only way to get rid of the fear of doing something is to go out and do it” — Susan Jeffers

Fear will always be part of all of us in one form or another. And this applies to people everywhere. It’s clear no matter who you are, no matter where you live, no matter what you are experiencing in life, we all have fear. But it doesn’t need to hold us back from living a rich and beautiful life.

Two weeks ago, I felt that something was bothering me, and I didn’t know what it was, I thought, was just a negative thought that popped in my head, and it will disappear soon.

I left there without even thinking about it. But then I started to realize my mood started to change; I was in stress, I was easily irritable for anything. I made a pause and started to recognize what really was bothering me. It was an argument with a friend easy to fix with a call.

“Every time you encounter something that forces you to “handle it,” your self-esteem is raised considerably. You learn to trust that you will survive, no matter what happens. And in this way, your fears are diminished immeasurably.” ― Susan Jeffers

Five hundred years ago, Michel de Montaigne, who was one of the most significant philosophers of the French Renaissance, said: “My life has been filled with terrible misfortune; most of which never happened.” Now there’s a study that proves it.

This study looked into how many of our imagined calamities never materialize. In this study, subjects were asked to write down their worries over an extended period of time and then identify which of their imagined misfortunes did not actually happen. It turns out that 85 percent of what subjects worried about never happened, and with the 15 percent that did happen, 79 percent of subjects discovered either they could handle the difficulty better than expected, or the difficulty taught them a lesson worth learning. This means that 97 percent of what you worry over is not much more than a fearful mind punishing you with exaggerations and misperceptions.

Let’ s break this down to see how we can handle it.

First Put Your Ego on the Side

“A bad day for your ego is a great day for your soul.” — Jillian Michaels

Everyone has fear. Again, Everyone has fear even if people said not they have it. When people said that their ego is working, just assume that. Make things easier for you.

I agree that society makes us believe that have fear isn’t acceptable, but it doesn’t mean that it doesn’t exist inside us. That is why people can’t accept that and never face it. Even knowing that is there waiting for you. It is better to face your fear when you have energy than when you are weak.

If you let your ego manage your feeling, you will be overwhelmed soon. Your ego in its purpose to protect you the unique thing ego does well is giving you instant gratification, not to face the reality.

It keeps you in your comfort zone. Long term gratification is never an option for your ego. Time will let you know. Just favor your self, putting your ego on the side.

Learn to Live With Your Fear

“Fear is the main source of superstition, and one of the main sources of cruelty. To conquer fear is the beginning of wisdom.” — Bertrand Russell

I am sure that part of the problem is the nonstop little voice our head to keep saying: You are better not change the situation, there is nothing else out there for you. You will never make it on your own, to this. Don’t take a chance. You might make a mistake, boy, will you be sorry.

If you know your fear, be aware of it, and embrace it. It will be easier to ask this question:

what is the worse that can happen?

And realize that the worse is not that bad at all. This question will help you when you know you have that feeling.

When you make your fear part of you, nothing will stop you. You will feel the power to achieve your goals with confidence.

Think about this.

When you have a fear of something, and you take action and face it, then you feel empowered, and you believe the fear is gone. After that, to grow, you want to learn new skills, and right away, you realize that the fear is again there.

As long as you want to grow, you have to understand that the fear will be close to you. The key is to learn how to handle and be with it.

Final Thoughts

Make your fear a close friend and put your ego on the side will help you to achieve your goals faster and will empower you to be better and confident in each action that you decide to take. Not only thinking about the instant gratification that you can have when you don’t face it.

If you knew you could handle anything that came your way, what would you possibly have to fear? Nothing right! Fear will never go away as long as you continue to grow. Just do it.

Thank you for reading.

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Godofredo Rojas is a writer, chef, and constant learner from Peru. He studied in Le Cordon Bleu in Lima, Peru. He moved to New York in March 2011. You can find him on Facebook and Twiter.