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lassic Gale thing to say. (Author’s photo; modified in Canva)</figcaption></figure><p id="c9c8">^^^Some people would call that insolence. I call it comedy gold. But don’t tell Gale I said that.</p><p id="e4fb">Some quotable moments are short and sweet (see below).</p><figure id="5153"><img src="https://cdn-images-1.readmedium.com/v2/resize:fit:800/1*C_3Q_Pd2gAGuAtWq3H-wBQ.jpeg"><figcaption>Actually, he might have said, “Aww.” But this would have been funnier. (Author’s Photo; modified in Canva)</figcaption></figure><p id="9fef">^^^It’s true. Ask any early childhood educator! Swearing in context is a sign of an exceptional vocabulary.</p><p id="0b4a">And, speaking of bullshit (see below) —</p><figure id="3dea"><img src="https://cdn-images-1.readmedium.com/v2/resize:fit:800/1*9B99dm31Bm2m_4ghFL7H9w.jpeg"><figcaption>“Look at my bullshit and see what I’ve found…” (Author’s Image; lyrics parody of theme song; Canva)</figcaption></figure><p id="d3e8"><b>Okay, maybe that last picture wasn’t a direct quote <i>or</i> something my kid said, either.</b> It’s a little ditty I sang to my seven-year-old — to the tune of the “<a href="https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=MLCg1kb1sA0">Pinwheel” TV theme song</a> [<i>external link</i>] from the 70s — when Gale said he’d washed his hands after using the bathroom.</p><p id="d177">It’s also the song that replays in my head when someone lies. (#PlayfulParenting)!</p><p id="73ac"><b>A moment in my household that doesn’t belong in the family scrapbook?</b></p><blockquote id="98df"><p>Bullshit.</p></blockquote><p id="1f53"><b>Note</b>:<i> This post is a continuation of a series of memeworthy quotes I’ve compulsively made in Canva.</i></p><div id="67ff" class="link-block"> <a href="https://readmedium.com/i-cant-stop-making-instagram-squares-with-people-s-quotable-quotes-2d8dda6bed6b"> <div> <div> <h2>I Can’t Stop Making Instagram Squares With People’s Quotable Quotes</h2> <div><h3>But so far, nobody has told me to go meme myself and the horse I rode in on</h3></div> <div><p>medium.

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com</p></div> </div> <div> <div style="background-image: url(https://miro.readmedium.com/v2/resize:fit:320/1*jhfL5aTv6ekDOCH0OVCnXw.jpeg)"></div> </div> </div> </a> </div><div id="fd86" class="link-block"> <a href="https://readmedium.com/more-uplifting-highly-quotable-quotes-from-medium-and-elsewhere-26d882fb9a5d"> <div> <div> <h2>More Uplifting, Highly-Quotable Quotes from Medium — and Elsewhere</h2> <div><h3>I still can’t stop making Canva memes of Medium writers’ wise words</h3></div> <div><p>medium.com</p></div> </div> <div> <div style="background-image: url(https://miro.readmedium.com/v2/resize:fit:320/1*woRcLyp0oCqY71ppNuBKqg.jpeg)"></div> </div> </div> </a> </div><p id="656e">Join <a href="https://medium.com/@lindyvogel/membership">Lindy Vogel on Medium</a>, <a href="https://lindyvogel.medium.com/subscribe">subscribe</a>, and follow <a href="https://swearymommy.com/">SwearyMommy.com</a> for more sassy comebacks to innocent questions.</p><p id="9858">IG: <a href="https://www.instagram.com/theswearymommy/">@TheSwearyMommy</a> Twitter: @TheLindyVogel Facebook: Lindy Vogel</p><p id="bf92"><b>Dead or Alive? </b><i>We will publish a story every 24 hours as long as we can. Help us stay alive; submit a story today!</i></p><div id="0e68" class="link-block"> <a href="https://readmedium.com/dead-or-alive-a-new-temporary-publication-on-medium-c917fb2f6903"> <div> <div> <h2>Dead Or Alive — A New (Temporary) Publication on Medium</h2> <div><h3>Join us today</h3></div> <div><p>medium.com</p></div> </div> <div> <div style="background-image: url(https://miro.readmedium.com/v2/resize:fit:320/1*MbtrbZBAxZlq4HM-i-oCOA.jpeg)"></div> </div> </div> </a> </div></article></body>

#3 — SPIRITUAL MOMMERY

Shit My Kids Say: Meme Version

Messages of Inspiration and Hope, From The Mouths of Babes

Guilty as charged. But I think I’ve earned it, son. (Author’s Photo; modified in Canva)

Do you have children? Smillew Rahcuef and I do!

Well, not together. We each have children. He has more than me, and I have six fucking kids. So he probably has a better “kid quotes” collection than I do.

Still, there are a few wise words I’d like to share — straight from the mouths of the bratty-ass kids in my household.

From the Vogel Family archives —

It’s wild out there in my living room. Twelve-year-olds be savage. (Author’s photo; modified in Canva)

^^^This is what happens, Mom, when you tell your kids to be kinder and gentler with each other.

Sometimes it’s good to be frank, though (see below).

An oft-repeated sentence of a toddler with two older brothers. (Author’s photo; modified in Canva)

^^^Younger sibs end up as captive breathers and guardians of the vehicle air. There is great wisdom in those four words, especially because that kid now has four brothers. No SBDs, guys.

I think the most profound quote so far has come from our second-youngest, though (see below).

A classic Gale thing to say. (Author’s photo; modified in Canva)

^^^Some people would call that insolence. I call it comedy gold. But don’t tell Gale I said that.

Some quotable moments are short and sweet (see below).

Actually, he might have said, “Aww.” But this would have been funnier. (Author’s Photo; modified in Canva)

^^^It’s true. Ask any early childhood educator! Swearing in context is a sign of an exceptional vocabulary.

And, speaking of bullshit (see below) —

“Look at my bullshit and see what I’ve found…” (Author’s Image; lyrics parody of theme song; Canva)

Okay, maybe that last picture wasn’t a direct quote or something my kid said, either. It’s a little ditty I sang to my seven-year-old — to the tune of the “Pinwheel” TV theme song [external link] from the 70s — when Gale said he’d washed his hands after using the bathroom.

It’s also the song that replays in my head when someone lies. (#PlayfulParenting)!

A moment in my household that doesn’t belong in the family scrapbook?

Bullshit.

Note: This post is a continuation of a series of memeworthy quotes I’ve compulsively made in Canva.

Join Lindy Vogel on Medium, subscribe, and follow SwearyMommy.com for more sassy comebacks to innocent questions.

IG: @TheSwearyMommy Twitter: @TheLindyVogel Facebook: Lindy Vogel

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Bullshit
Quotes
Parenting Humor
Parenting
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