Screwed! (Routinely)

Writers, whatever you do, don’t bend over

Before you get too far into this piece, I want to warn you that I am not going to dive into the new Medium bullshit. Already, it’s been done to a rapid death and, no matter what is written, it appears that the “little people” here, in other words, those of us who haven’t amassed a gazillion followers, are going to be taking it up the ass.

Now, I’ve experienced this particular affliction before and I want to tell you: It ain’t pleasant. No, worse. It hurts like hell. Here’s an example:

When I was starting out as a screenwriter, I hooked up with another writer who said he had an idea for a screenplay and had garnered the interest of Hugh Grant for the lead.

This jerkoff asked me if I wanted to “co-write” the project and share in the spoils. Being a bit more on the green side than I am now, I figured, “Why not?” The caveat was that he needed the screenplay like yesterday. Apparently, old Hugh was pissing his drawers at the thought of having to wait for this gem.

I had to write it within a two-week time frame, which is insane, as anyone who has written a script knows. INSANE. But I delivered, even with a fulltime job. In fact, I worked my unsuspecting ass off.

Even though he was supposed to co-write, I did all the work. I basically took a turd of an idea and turned it into a rough-cut diamond. It was a comedy, by the way. I wasn’t thrilled with the concept, but I made it work.

Without boring the Pandemic Pants off you, let’s just say he screwed me. Took the script, stripped me of any credit, and worse, trashed a production deal I had set up with a producer who was good friends with Hugh Grant and loved the screenplay. He told the producer that I had stolen his script and that’s all it took to fuck up a deal that would have established me as a working screenwriter.

To add insult to serious injury, I was going to get paid a considerable amount of dough for my efforts, compensation that I would have shared with the idiot, who turned out to be a complete charlatan. He couldn’t even write.

The shit got ugly. So bad, in fact, that it affected me emotionally and physically. Because I couldn’t afford the type of shark lawyer who would have stuck it to this guy, in the way that he deserved, I had to let it go.

As far as I know, the twit is still trying to sell it.

Royal screwing number two took place a few years later when I pitched an original TV pilot to a producer, who then proceeded to ghost me and rip off the idea. I wouldn’t have known if an industry connect hadn’t alerted me to the notice on IMDB.Com (International Movie Data Base.)

I did talk to a couple of lawyers this time, but it would have been difficult to prove outright theft. Even though the concept and characters were the same as mine. Thankfully, the pilot never got past the pre-production stage because actually seeing my uncredited work on the small screen would have sent me around the bend.

In my career as an advertising and marketing writer, I’ve had ideas stolen from Executive Creative Directors who had no business being in the business. They got lucky. As many incompetents do.

My point here is that writers get routinely screwed. Whether it be in the entertainment industry, corporate America, or here on Medium, we’re continually taken for granted and worse, ripped off.

You freelancers, especially know what I’m talking about. When I was freelancing as a marketing and advertising copywriter, I was consistently low-balled because, hey, anyone can write…right?

And that’s another ugly truth to our routinely being discounted for our abilities. Why should a company pay us what we’re worth when ANY ONE of their own staffers could “throw something together,” copy-wise, be it Derrick the IT guy or Madge, the Senior Administrative Assistant?

In many respects, quality writing, be it a sell-sheet for a client or a well-crafted story doesn’t get the love it deserves. Unless you’re a Stephen King or a Gillian Flynn — or any writer of that caliber who can virtually broker their own deals. In my personal experience, writers have always been low on the totem pole.

I never understood this and I still don’t. Hooking up with Medium has only added to the puzzle. The awful listicles and “how-to” pieces. The “look at me, everyone” braggadocio. And then, there’s just the crap. Badly written and conceived “stories” from people who have no business calling themselves writers.

Yet, this dung-heap boasts more curations than you, and I will ever rack up. Perhaps some of the Medium editors are dumb as posts. I couldn’t say, but the proof is in the stink.

Because I’m always up for a challenge, I would love to have the acumen to start and grow a platform like this, but the necessary “pyrotechnics” are way beyond my abilities.

And in spite of all of the “Chillax, People” stories in response to the discomfort, disappointment, and all-out fear we’re feeling at the prospect of our intellectual property being used without our consent, I’m not feeling it. I’m the farthest thing from chill.

Something’s going on and it stinks. Bullshit always does.

Sherry McGuinn is a slightly-twisted, longtime Chicago-area writer and award-winning screenwriter. Her work has appeared in The Chicago Tribune, Chicago Sun-Times, and numerous other publications. Sherry’s manager is currently pitching her newest screenplay, a drama with dark, comedic overtones and inspired by a true story.

Thanks so much for reading. If you enjoyed this, please read on.