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Lemon’s Cousin

Another Loser Coffee Pot

It All Started with Lemon

Several years ago we bought a new coffee pot. Because of it’s many malfunctions we named it “Lemon.” I told you that sad story a few stories ago.

Now another coffee pot malfunction!

Mr. Coffee to the Rescue

After Lemon, we bought a new 12-cup coffee pot. A simple one. No pre-programming to brew coffee at 6 am. After all, we get up at 5 am. No low setting to keep it warm all day. That’s what microwaves are for. No clock. We have one on the wall, thank you very much.

It doesn’t brew cappuccino or espresso. You buy those at Starbucks for a special treat. No choice of light, medium, or strong. One might ask the obvious: why would a “real” coffee drinker choose other than “strong”?

Our coffee pot brews coffee. It doesn’t tell time or make other beverages. The only choice is caf or decaf. That choice is moot: “real” coffee drinkers do not drink decaf.

The new pot performed its duties well, day after day, pot after pot. We drink a lot of coffee at our house. Two pots sometimes three a day. Even in the summer when others are sipping ice tea with too much sugar.

Eric takes a large thermos of coffee to work every day. So I’m making the second pot around 5:30 in the morning.

Please no comments about how drinking too much coffee is bad for one’s health. And comments promoting tea are also unwelcome. Tea is fine if one has the flu or bronchitis. But there’s no reason a healthy person would drink tea.

Calamity Strikes

I have this mistaken belief that everything should go in the dishwasher. That’s why one has a dishwasher. Sometimes I visit my son Stephen and his partner, Jen. They have a complicated system of this goes in the dishwasher, that doesn’t. I don’t help make these decisions at their house although I’m happy to chop the garlic for guacamole.

Stephen and Jen enjoy building towers of clean dishes, pots and pans on the counter above the dishwasher. Stephen came to visit us and helped out in the kitchen. He kept enough dishes out of our dishwasher to build a tower. He took a picture of the tower and sent it to Jen.

But wait, maybe Stephen and Jen are on to something. I regularly put the new coffee pot with it’s not-to-be removed lid in the dishwasher. Then one day it refused to leave its spot in dishwasher without first removing the not-to-be removed lid.

Now we have a coffee pot with a lid that falls off when one pours the coffee. Once more, not unlike the story of Lemon-the-coffee-pot, the coffee sometimes misses the coffee mug.

You might think the answer is to hold the lid on while pouring the coffee. You forget that one needs to remember holding the lid before pouring the coffee. It doesn’t help to remember to hold the lid after pouring the coffee.

Eric and I are resourceful people. After all, our parents lived through the Depression. I will buy just a new carafe, no need to toss Mr. Coffee.

I buy a “universal” replacement carafe. Right there on the box it says “works with Mr. Coffee” along with a dozen other brands of coffee makers. It even comes with two lids in case you put a lid in the dishwasher and it melts.

Eric tries it out at 5 AM the next morning. I will spare you the details of the mess that follows. I clean up the mess. He makes another pot of coffee in the carafe with the do-not-remove-lid at the expense of being late to work.

I will return the “universal” replacement carafe, buy a carafe specifically for Mr. Coffee. I put it universal carafe in its box and look for the receipt. But wait, I look more carefully at the second lid. It’s different. Ah, maybe the second lid works for Mr. Coffee. It’s not just a replacement in case the first one melts in the dishwasher.

The new lid doesn’t work. Luckily I find this out before making a pot of coffee and cleaning up another mess. (I do admit that tea bags aren’t as messy as hot, wet coffee grounds.)

Eric says, “Oh forget it. Just get a new coffee pot.” I reply, “Oh, I can just order a Mr. Coffee replacement from Amazon and avoid leaving my stay-at-home status.” I was right. However, the replacement is more expensive than a new coffee pot.

I’ll buy a new coffee pot today. Because we’re resourceful, I’ll save the old coffee maker just in case. And Eric can use the carafe with the lid not-to-be-removed to water the petunias on the front porch.

Please, let this be my last story about loser coffee pots. And if you didn’t read about Lemon, you can do so now.

Watch for my forthcoming ebook, Oh Look, There’s a Squirrel and Other Stories.

I offer words of wisdom to adult ADHDers and to folks who are adopted. I am both. (Many adopted folks have ADHD, often caused from trauma at birth.)

You’ll find me at LivingWithAdoption.com. For a list of common adoption challenges, grab my free Adoption Checklist for Women: 25 Life Issues.

Given raging ADHD, it’s no surprise that focus does not come to me easily! In addition to adoption and ADHD, I also write random stories from my life, what I’ve observed, what’s in the news, about writing and editing, anything that tickles my fancy.

For a Black Lives Matter from a white perspective, see my stories For White Folks from an Old Gray-Haired White Woman with Arthritis. And Teaching Kindergarten at an all-Black school.

You might also like musings on Staying at Home because of COVID 19: The Good, The Bad, and the Not So Ugly.