Run or Die, Game 10— Mumbai Drift
I want to win
Matt, the read-headed cockney dwarf, is after me. We have just been teleported in the middle of Mumbai for a game of run or die. And, contrary to this Rob Roy cockney, I don’t know the city.
Edward John, the show host, has been clear. This round is meant to be extra hard on me. After my nine wins series, they will do anything to get me killed and avoid paying the 1 billion currencies waiting for the 10 straight winner. Bunch of scammers.
Matt wasn’t born in Mumbai, that’s against the rules, but he has been dating Preeti, the famous Dhangari Gaja singer, for twelve years now. He knows the city by dick, if not by heart.
If I don’t find something quick, there are going to make a tikka masala of me. The horror; I only eat tandoori. Makes me hungry. I turn right on Kanda Batata Poha and catch a vada pav from a vendor. “I’ll pay you hundredfold with my wins,” I shout, running away.
I’m not a nine straight winner for nothing.
I’ve got resources. And I’ve been through worse in my life. I was a competitive undies thrower in my youth. Nothing can match the pressure of throwing the thong of the love of your life for a world champion title. Nothing.
I need a bus driver. A Bad Bus Driver. One that is ready to roadkill some innocents for currencies. In a city that big, it shouldn’t be too difficult to find. Nothing like running behind a bus for speed and protection.
Found one! He looks like a penguin; that’s good! Penguin-looking bus drivers are usually mean beasts on the roads.
Fuck.
He’s an Argumentative Penguin.
I’m dead.
This story was inspired by the Argumentative Penguin’s micro-confession in the shortform. I used names from commenters there. I hope you liked it, people! I ask for your forgiveness if you didn’t. Private note me if you want your name removed.
Here are some stories from the heroes mentioned above:
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