Rise and Shine With a Sparkling Mind
How to make an Optimist out of a Realist
Although there is a lot of realism and pessimism in the world, I’ve come to believe that these two attitudes can make some people feel uninspired and bored with life; meaning they live a fairly normal existence, avoiding risk and extremes, but at the same time, they can lack positive engagement, passion and focus.
So if you want to feel more upbeat and enthusiastic, here’s how to step out of the ordinary and into the big wide open — like a true optimist, by simply throwing a few new ‘ingredients’ into the mix.
Act Like A Beginner
I have found this to be a very helpful approach. Although we all know things, if you start each day as if you don’t, you start with a clean, fresh slate and nothing to interfere with new ideas or information you take in, and you can be more straightforward and calm in your thinking.
You’re not trying to forget what you previously learned, but you’re adding to it, without muddying or judging every previous thought and decision you made.
Have An Open Mind / Curiosity
One thing I’ve observed, is that optimists keep an open mind and ask more questions than other people do. They’re also not afraid to admit when they don’t know something; and there’s no shame in that.
This is why an open, curious mind is so important; because without it, we cannot adjust our views or outlook, or stay up-to-date in the ever-changing modern world.
Play to Your Strengths
Play to your natural strengths, whatever they are. Not only does this increase your self-esteem and optimism, but you’ll enjoy being yourself when you realise how productive, creative and useful you can be. And forget about weaknesses, we all have those, and they’re not interesting.
Understand: Nothing is Personal — and that’s a good thing
Don’t take anything personally and take everything people say with ‘a pinch of salt’. Also, consciously decide not to be offended by anything. If you do these three things, like optimists do, you’ll feel much lighter and more carefree on a daily basis.
Remember, when people say things, they’re talking through the filters of their own experience and focus, so their thoughts are colored by their own perception of events; good, bad or otherwise.
Therefore, nothing that is said is entirely objective, and what works or doesn’t work for someone else, may have different results for you. So if you keep this in mind when listening and making decisions, your judgment will be as good as it can be.
Be Mindful — Always try to focus on the positive
For example: Two people may go to an evening party together, but because they focus on different things, they have different opinions of the event afterwards. Neither is right or wrong, but Person A (the optimist) ends up feeling a lot better than Person B.
Person A: Goes to the party and focuses on: The amazing lighting, the array of fancy drinks, two people kissing, some people laughing, the fun DJ. The great music, a fabulous dancer, the big food menu, a pretty girl in the corner.
Person B: Goes to the same party and focuses on: Two people arguing, the toilet door slamming, the rude bouncer, too many people at the bar, nowhere to hang their jacket. Not enough tables, the expensive drinks, a drunkard on the floor.
From the example above, it’s easy to see that Person A had a much better experience. The only difference between these people is what they chose to focus on; so people need to make sure that they focus on and look for what is good in any situation.
This is what optimists do all the time, and it really makes a big difference to their life. The more you practise looking for what is good, the more easily you’ll notice it.
Be with the right people
Be around sunny and positive people. If you can’t be with anyone for practical or other reasons, you’re better off being productive and alone than with people that are cynical, negative or leave you feeling down. No matter how well meaning these people are, they’re simply not good for your spirit, so it’s best to limit your exposure to them.
If you don’t know any uplifting people, you’re not alone and this isn’t uncommon, but the next best thing is to read about people you admire, or listen to them online. Research anybody and everybody that you think is ‘your kind of wonderful’ and those with really good ideas and behaviours that influence you in a positive way.
Always be learning something new
Just reading those words can make some people feel tired. However, in my experience, whenever you start learning something new, it not only sharpens your mind and makes you feel younger, but the pay-off is that you get to feel more competent and optimistic generally. I don’t know how this works, but I can tell you that it does.
Take Calculated Risks
Most people don’t take enough ‘calculated’ risks. I don’t mean take reckless risks, just small, well thought-out ones. Also, many people don’t notice opportunities in their environment. However, opportunity is everywhere, if you look hard enough. You can also create your own opportunities, if you indulge your imagination.
Taking small, calculated risks regularly, is not only exciting, but is a really good way to prove how much luck and expansion you can bring about from your own efforts — and it makes you more confident, optimistic and hopeful.
Believe in Yourself
Always behave as if you can get what you want in life, and believe in yourself, no matter what is happening for anyone else. If you believe you can win, you’re half way there, because you wont be thrown off by other people that say it can’t happen, or that it’s never been done before.
If something hasn’t worked for anyone else, that’s okay, because none of their results can be applied to you. Other people don’t know what you’re made of. So, if you believe you’re a winner, or can be a winner, you can also believe in your ability to create your own luck, and that’s a very fortunate conviction.
Feel Lucky and Be Lucky
Think of all the things in life that have made you lucky. All the small things, big things and everything in between. Go over it in detail, and you’ll find a massive amount of luck has been breezing through your life from day one, without you even noticing.
At the start of my life, I had a really bad deck of cards that nobody would want. However, despite that, I consider myself to be one of the luckiest people alive. Not because of those dodgy cards, but because of the luck I have been able to create and ‘notice’ by looking in the right direction, despite the cards.
I believe that, ‘lucky’ is a way of behaving, and believing you’ve got ‘the edge’ to be able to pull off anything you want to in life, despite your circumstances and challenges.
Optimists Create Their Own Luck
The great thing about believing you’re lucky, is that it’s the furthest you’ll ever be from self-pity and defeat. So dig out the evidence for yourself today, so you can know it, enjoy the feeling, and stride out with hope.
Many optimists believe they’re lucky and often create their own luck, by having a positive, assertive attitude, which then attracts even more good fortune.
Optimism is essential to achievement and it is also the foundation of courage and true progress — Nicholas M. Butler
Play to Win
No matter what is going on in your life, always believe you’re going to win. Not just because you’re good at what you do, but because it’s you — and you only play to win.
I have personally found that, if you’re not concerned with failure and you don’t let it scare you, then you don’t have much to do with it; and even when things do fail, you can brush them off quite easily and start again. After all, everybody fails at some time.
When you’re focused on success (by your own definition), your mind is in a state of positive anticipation, so it’s a good place to be, always believing you’ll end up on the sunny side of life. This is what being an optimist is all about: You get knocked down, but you get up again.
Everybody Loves an Optimist
Some people feel that optimists are happy dreamers, but whatever they are, I would rather be an optimist and live in hope, joy, excitement and occasional disappointment, than be flattened and subdued for a lifetime.
Who really wants to have a dull and so-called ‘realistic’ approach to life, never taking chances and not feeling much about anything? After all, most healthy people want to feel alive, and have some fun in the process.
I hope this story has made your mind sparkle!
© America Zed. Other Self-Help Stories by America Zed.