Randle Moore, You Are Charged With High Crimes Against Writers

Defend your writing and face the consequences.

Judge Q: Randle Moore, your published articles, in your first month are causing concern among the writing community. You are charged with high crimes against writers and content unbecoming a writer. How do you plead?

I plead not guilty, Your Honor.

Judge Q: D.A. Hamilton Burger, are you prepared to present your case.

Ham Burger: I am, Your Honor.

Your Honor, I have collected three of Mr. Moore’s submissions from his first month of publishing. He submitted these stories under the pretext of being worthy of publishing.

Your Honor, I will prove that Mr. Moore used poor grammar, misspelling, misused punctuation, passive voice, wordy sentences, repetitive vocabulary, poor print styling, misleading tags, poor photos or images, and monotonous content.

Furthermore, Your Honor, I shall show beyond a shadow of a doubt, Mr. Moore is unworthy of publishing within this venue.

Exhibit #1

Ham Burger: Let’s examine the first exhibit, a “How To” piece entitled “You Can Create A Phone App for Your Story Ideas.” We will consider this entry under these criteria:

• Published: Sept. 18, 2019
• Title and subtitle: You Can Create A Phone App for Your Story Ideas / I’ll show you how using Google Forms. Using a (1) headline analyzer, Title rates 40.00%, and Subtitle rates 28.57%. Mr. Moore, your title rates well at 40%, and your subtitle precisely states what your intent is. However, is anyone interested in creating an app? Isn’t it easier to get something from the app store?
• Print Styling: Your print styling, while not distracting, looks amateurish.
• Spelling & Punctuation: You failed to put a comma after the word “Title” in the last sentence of step #6.
• Photos: Although you have a lot of pictures, they look cheap.
• Content: BORING! While it is evident that you spent considerable time detailing the steps to create an app using Google Forms, is anyone interested? I think not based on your stats for the month.
• Interest Level:

Defense Rebuttal: Thank you, Your Honor. My response to Mr. Burger’s observations is “no contest,” except for photos and content. Within the entire collection of quality free-to-use photos on Unsplash, I could find no illustrations for the steps I wished to explain. As for the content, I told what my goal was in the title and subtitle. I also used appropriate tags of Writing and Technology to appeal to correct subject groups.

I would also like to point out I have subscribed to and used the Premium version of Grammarly. I use this application to attempt to eliminate spelling, punctuation, and grammar errors, to minimize passive voice, and to rid text of wordiness.

Exhibit #2

Ham Burger: Let’s examine the second exhibit, a “Writer’s Tips” piece entitled “How is a writer like a child?”.

• Published: Sept. 13, 2019
• Title and subtitle: How is a writer like a child? / This question sounds like the straight line of a bad joke. (1) 0.00% / 0.00%. Mr. Moore, this title and subtitle are so lame, they are Dead on Arrival. They have no emotional marketing value. Within the English language, random words have, on average, a rate of 20.00%. Not only are these titles weak, neither the title or subtitle gives any hint as to the content of the article. Mr. Moore, you have dull, boring clickbait.
• The title also is supposed to be in the title case. You have no regard for clearly stated and observed print styling conventions.
• Content: Mr. Moore, you have two paragraphs in this submission that mostly say the same thing. The second paragraph under Every Thing Tells a Story is virtually identical in concept to the section beneath Observe the People.
• Interest Level:

Defense Rebuttal: Your Honor, the title is funny, awakens a reader’s curiosity, and does relate to the content. Within the context of the essay, I explained how writers should be like children in observing the world around them.

Mr. Burger stated I failed to use the title case for the title. Yes, that is true; however, according to (3) Medium’s Curation Guidelines, title case is optional. The guidelines state, “Standard headline styling is title case for the headline and sentence case for the subtitle. This isn’t required but is ideal.”

Title case is not always used. I offer these examples:

• Is your Numpy optimized for speed?, Sept. 27, 2019
• Black-Box models are actually more explainable than a Logistic Regression, Sept. 21, 2019
• What are five ways to screw up your screenplay?, July 17, 2019

As for the duplication of the content paragraphs, my excuse is I’m still learning. I’m on the steep side of the learning curve.

Exhibit #3

Ham Burger: Let’s examine the third, and final exhibit, a narrative entitled “Secret Sex Rendezvous Does Not Remain Secret for Long.”

• Published: Sept. 28, 2019
• Title and subtitle: Secret Sex Rendezvous Does Not Remain Secret for Long 66.67%/ A secret rendezvous in a school restroom leads to oral sex and consequences. 61.54% Unlike exhibit #2, Mr. Moore, your choice of title and subtitle are home runs as far as emotional appeal, and they meet the accepted norms and intent. You are commended on this aspect of the expose.
• Passive voice: Mr. Moore, Grammarly noted three occurrences of passive voice in this article, yet you still chose to publish.
• Wordy sentence: Grammarly noted this sentence to be wordy, “And the best feature of all, as far as users were concerned, each restroom could be locked from the inside.”
• Print styling: Repetitive use of drop cap is distracting and contrary to established norms. It is customary to use drop caps only at the beginning of a new chapter or section. Drop caps are not meant for every paragraph.
• Interest Level:

Defense Rebuttal: Your Honor, I thank Mr. Burger for his generous comments regarding my choice of title and subtitle. I worked hard to find titles that would have emotional appeal and serve their intended purpose.

I accept Mr. Burger’s statements that repetitive drop caps may be distracting to some readers.

As far as disregarding Grammarly’s notices regarding passive voice and wordy sentence, I claim my rights of editorial discretion to choose how to word my narrative. Grammarly uses computer algorithms and fixed protocols. A computer can not generate creativity. Only a living author can create.

Court’s Ruling: Mr. Moore, after careful consideration of the evidence and rebuttal submitted, it is this court’s finding that you are guilty of flagrant violations of some norms of the writing community. However, it is equally noted that you appear to have a passion for writing and communicating with your audience. It seems to this court that you are learning and are applying your new knowledge as you continue to write and publish.

Therefore:

You are ordered to remain a probationary writer for an additional period of not less than 30 days, at which time your monthly stats may be reconsidered.

You are also ordered to write and publish as much quality work as you can during your probationary period.

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Resources Used for this article:

(1) Advanced Marketing Institute’s Headline Analyzer — “This score indicates that your headline has a total of 40.00% Emotional Marketing Value (EMV) Words. To put that in perspective, the English language contains approximately 20% EMV words. And for comparison, most professional copywriters’ headlines will have 30%-40% EMV Words in their headlines, while the most gifted copywriters will have 50%-75% EMV words in headlines.”

(2) Grammarly — ” free writing app to make their messages, documents, and posts clear, mistake-free, and effective.” [Premium is a subscription upgrade.]

(3) Medium’s Curation Guidelines: everything writers need to know

© CopyRight Randle B. Moore, 2019. All rights are reserved.